Honestly I never understood why?

You are available and attractive. What line of work are you lining them up at. I am betting healthcare

Married women from work and my local circle made the first advances which lead to sexual encounters and affairs.

Cautionary for all husbands. If the wife is working around other men, especially in particular professions. Opportunity awaits

 

Cautionary for all husbands. If the wife is working around other men, edpecially in particular professions. Opportunity awaits

Nonsense. I’ve worked with mostly men my whole career. It’s about character not opportunity.

 

Yes there is an easy answer, you stop doing it. How would you feel about a guy doing the same with your wife if you were married?
So what if women approach you? You say no, it's not hard.
People who cheat will always lie about their spouse and marriage. They lie and deceive and cheat and you are part of their deception.

Please start acting as if you actually have some moral values and integrity.

Believe me a decent lady will have no interest in marrying a man who has been committing adultery with loads of married women and who can blame her.

 

Its complicated, if it wasn't me or others like OP, it would have been another guy.

Thats the justification I played in my mind when I did the same thing. It's not something I'm proud of, but when the opportunity presented itself... you know...

I'm hoping I will never be that guy again but I understand where OP is coming from

 

It doesn't matter that other people don't know this side of you. You know the truth.

Based on your comment of, "I know the husbands would be unhappy if they found out" tells me you don't get this. "Unhappy"? How about destroyed!! Families BLOWN UP because of this. Young kids lives ripped apart. It's also not uncommon for a betrayed spouse after finding out to commit suicide.

"Being single this was fun"? Again you do NOT get it. The ol if you didn't have sex with them someone else would so why not you???

You say you're "professional", "cultured", and "educated"? You think you exude these attributes but you have NO IDEA the true definition of what these mean.

Character is what you do when nobody is watching you and what you do. To be blunt you are a snake.

You can't control what these women do but you sure can control what you do. Are you going to continue to stick your D!$K into married women because it's "fun" or are you going to wake up to see the scum of a man that you are and change your evil ways?

 

Hello and thx for reading my post. I am male SINGLE mixrace professional educated cultured based in London UK

Over the years I have had both friendships and affairs with several married women.

Curiously I was not the one initiating the affair.
Married women from work and my local circle made the first advances which lead to sexual encounters and affairs.
Honestly I never understood why?

When I probed the questions with the women involved the answers were many and varied

Boredom
Neglected by husband
Need sexual gratification has husband is not up to the task
Some actually enjoyed cheating and loved the thrill of illicit affairs.
Revenge on cheating husband
Others wanted to experiment into various kinks lifestyles without husband knowlegde.

I never went out to look for affairs actively. It just happened many times on a regularly basis
If I refused or said not interested the women replied they would look elsewhere.
So might as well be me instead as a trusted friend companion lover.

Being single this was fun as its sex with no committment whatsoever. Took precautions like condons and std free

In my day to day life I am seen as someone who would never ever do anything like this.
I have always kept this strictly private with not even my closest friends ever knowing this side of me.

I know the husbands would be unhappy if this they found out.
Other men turned a blind eye

Stay married but unhapppy?
Or Play discreetly outside the marriage

There is no easy answer I guess

Would like to hear your thoughts

Kindly appreciate honest comments but refrain from abuse

Regards

Most of the reasons you have listed are commonly given by the women but not necessarily true. For example a woman tells you she is being neglected by her husband when in fact the husband has been attentive and frozen out by his wife because she wants to bed another man. Not that it matters practically. Such women do what they do because they want to and they can not because of any real dissatisfaction in the marriage. One man to pay the bills (husband) and another man to enjoy the forbidden (you) while she indulges in her fantasy. Having your cake and eating it.

In my day to day life I am seen as someone who would never ever do anything like this. Such a reputation takes time and effort to build. Can be ruined in an instant. All it takes is the wrong woman. So far you have been fortunate and you have taken precautions against pregnancy and STDs. Everybody's number comes up sooner or later.

Like yourself I have had similar opportunities but have chosen to avoid entanglements. I know the pain of betrayal. I also refuse to betray my second wife who unlike the first has always had my back.

How exactly do you vet these women? How are you sure they only want sex vs you to monkey branch to. Trusting a wayward woman's word is folly. Trusting such a woman to keep your reputation intact is also folly especially if she gets caught and faces consequences.

Why don't the husbands do anything? Most are unaware there is a problem. Such loose women always require a convenient excuse to betray their husbands. If no problem exists she will manufacture one to justify her need to step out on her husband. If husbands are aware likely they have much to lose in a divorce (alimony, child support, division of assets). Others are spineless and fearful of loosing their wife. Joke is on them she is already gone. A few may have their own distractions and allow their wives to run wild.

Stay married but unhapppy?
Or Play discreetly outside the marriage Depends on who you are asking?

My first wife cheated on me. Once I learned the truth I ejected her from my life. I remarried a younger, better woman. I took no revenge against my replacement. He did me a favor by taking my second hand wife off my hands. Since I already have what I want and I know the cost of wayward behavior I chose not to indulge in the opportunities that have presented themselves. Not worth all the damage that can result. I have worked hard to build a future with a worthy partner and unwilling to squander it.

 

I worked my whole life in a male dominated profession. In various locations around the country. The stories I could tell of the affairs between married women and men on the job. Most of the men were also married, usually managers ( at all levels ). But the single men were in great demand.

I often wondered how we managed to actually accomplish the business we were in for all the romantic activity at work. My wife's career was female dominated. Most of the few men in her profession were only romantically interested in other males.

Yes, character is the main thing. But if there is an abundance of opportunity, some problems with the old man (or woman) at home adds some interest, some attention from another adds some sexual tension, humans often fail the character test. Again and again and again. So eliminate the opportunity decreases the potential for an affair IMO.

That is why I made a rule for myself, long ago. No female friends. No association with females unless my wife is with me.

 

I worked my whole life in a male dominated profession. In various locations around the country. The stories I could tell of the affairs between married women and men on the job. Most of the men were also married, usually managers ( at all levels ). But the single men were in great demand.

I often wondered how we managed to actually accomplish the business we were in for all the romantic activity at work. My wife's career was female dominated. Most of the few men in her profession were only romantically interested in other males.

Yes, character is the main thing. But if there is an abundance of opportunity, some problems with the old man (or woman) at home adds some interest, some attention from another adds some sexual tension, humans often fail the character test. Again and again and again. So eliminate the opportunity decreases the potential for an affair IMO.

That is why I made a rule for myself, long ago. No female friends. No association with females unless my wife is with me.

Thank you for your reply its appreciated

 

People of character avoid even the appearance of impropriety. The blame for these office affairs does not belong on a society that allows women to work or be around men other than their husband. Housewives cheat. Cheaters create opportunity. It is entirely possible for a woman to be “off leash” without cheating. Men cheat too, more often than women, and it was never because women were “around,” it was because they chose to cheat.

 

People of character avoid even the appearance of impropriety. The blame for these office affairs does not belong on a society that allows women to work or be around men other than their husband. Housewives cheat. Cheaters create opportunity. It is entirely possible for a woman to be “off leash” without cheating. Men cheat too, more often than women, and it was never because women were “around,” it was because they chose to cheat.

Stats please. You may be right, but I wouldn’t bet on it. Women have far more opportunities to cheat than men. BOTH are equally prone. From my experience, women are more likely to cheat in a circumstance where you have a married couple of 10 years or more and There’s never been cheating before. But that’s biased by me too.😊

 

......... still trying to decide if I need to run and get my popcorn or not.......

 

Save your popcorn, we can see where this is going. Same thing we always see. At the end of the day, cheaters cheat. That's why we call them "cheaters." Cause of all the cheating. 😂 I doubt we learn anything new from this.

 

My thoughts are you are an alley cat trying to disguise himself as a student of human nature. If someone drops a wallet, do you pick it up and keep it? If a school bus stops but does not put on the lights, do you race past it or do you look for students?

Every day, we ALL are faced with moral questions. The man/woman who flirts a little too much, the person who dropped something in front of us, the chance to cheat on a test, etc, etc, etc.

What separates you from people who prefer to live in a society is that you just take whatever comes you way and act like somehow the decision to do so does not define you. It does.

 

Or you could just call him a POS it's more expedient.

 

And your purpose for writing this in a forum of a bunch of people who have been betrayed is what exactly?

 

So, here you are - all proud of yourself and ****. Brag on.

 

@aryn.bbc What's the meaning of your user name, please?

 

He works for the BBC... all the spelling mistakes are there... hold on... that's The Guardian! 😂

 

Is Penthouse Letters still a thing? Maybe some of these posters should go there.

 

My view on single people having affairs with married people is that I personally do not want to cause anyone harm even indirectly, so I wouldn't have an affair/relationship with a married person, unless they were separated without intention to reconcile. That said, the real POSs are the women who initiate these affairs. While I don't approve of OP's actions, he is not married, and he (if he's to be believed) did not approach these women. IMO, there are degrees of responsibility one should exercise; for example, if I found a dollar on the street, I'd pick it up and keep it, but if I found a wallet or large amount of cash, I'd do my best to return it. In this case, someone is giving him "the wallet," and it IS theirs to give, though their husbands might dispute it (and apparently, not all would!). So while I don't approve of OP helping others break their vows, and wouldn't do so myself, he's not the POS here.

 

Yeah but it shouldn't be socially acceptable either. I remember 5 years ago you guys trashed me senseless over a potential affair looming between me and a married woman before I met my ex.

She probably fked some other guy, but not my sh-tshow.

 

Well working for the BBC makes more sense than an Aryan with a big…well you know.

 

But you are probably right...

 

You are just the type of chap who needs a solid USMC ass whooppin‘. Sooner or later you will mess with the wrong wife and you will likely regret your actions when the husband rains hell down on your ass.

 

I'd like a ring side seat to that one.

 

Thank you for the contribution to discuss, I will check it again tonight with my popcorn, hopefully not deleted that time.

 

Thank you all for your answers and perspective.
Even the insults thrown my way is okay. I forgive you all.
I am not here to judge anyone on their life choices and wish you all a nice day
Bye

 

You walk a dangerous line mate, but you know the risks. Just don't expect sympathy if it happens, I know I don't.

 

I wonder if he is writing an article or something.

 

That or he is simply smug, wanted to come on here, tell his tales of sleeping with other men's wives, and getting a chuckle at the thought of triggering them/us.

Although I'm not triggered since I am long gone from my x-*****, I still recognize a bottom dweller when I see one.

 

No one should even be a little shocked. Modern world has told women to go out and try it all, if you don't find it try it all again.
Divorce rates are 50% or higher in most nations. As many men can attest to here women don't want to give it up at home so it is being taken care of someplace else.

 

No one should even be a little shocked. Modern world has told women to go out and try it all, if you don't find it try it all again.
Divorce rates are 50% or higher in most nations. As many men can attest to here women don't want to give it up at home so it is being taken care of someplace else.

Interesting to see how many seem to live so called ideal lives and have a ideal world view. Where everything is perfect.
Facing reality of what actually happens in society is not for everyone.
The insults only shows the true character of the writer insluting others in my opinion
But thank you for all others engaging in the discussion

 

Deleted

 

Hello and thx for reading my post. I am male SINGLE mixrace professional educated cultured based in London UK

Over the years I have had both friendships and affairs with several married women.

Curiously I was not the one initiating the affair.
Married women from work and my local circle made the first advances which lead to sexual encounters and affairs.
Honestly I never understood why?

When I probed the questions with the women involved the answers were many and varied

Boredom
Neglected by husband
Need sexual gratification has husband is not up to the task
Some actually enjoyed cheating and loved the thrill of illicit affairs.
Revenge on cheating husband
Others wanted to experiment into various kinks lifestyles without husband knowlegde.

I never went out to look for affairs actively. It just happened many times on a regularly basis
If I refused or said not interested the women replied they would look elsewhere.
So might as well be me instead as a trusted friend companion lover.

Being single this was fun as its sex with no committment whatsoever. Took precautions like condons and std free

In my day to day life I am seen as someone who would never ever do anything like this.
I have always kept this strictly private with not even my closest friends ever knowing this side of me.

I know the husbands would be unhappy if this they found out.
Other men turned a blind eye

Stay married but unhapppy?
Or Play discreetly outside the marriage

There is no easy answer I guess

Would like to hear your thoughts

Kindly appreciate honest comments but refrain from abuse

Regards

Well I guess these women could say the truth, that they are just horrible people. But it doesn’t quite have that nice ring of victimhood.

There is something very broken about a person who enjoys having “unencumbered” sexual relationships with these kinds of women. Why are you posting about it?

 

Strangely reading all the replies to my post.

NO ONE HAS MENTIONED IF THE HUSBANDS HAD ANY RESPONSIBILITIES FOR THEIR ACTIONS

Are they somehow all Saintly Victims of a cheating wife and her lover?

Or maybe they by their actions behaviour attitude also contributed to their wives looking elsewhere?

I vote for the Guiltless Victims Card.

Husbands after all are such perfect specimens in every way imaginable in your imaginary world.

 

Strangely reading all the replies to my post.

NO ONE HAS MENTIONED IF THE HUSBANDS HAD ANY RESPONSIBILITIES FOR THEIR ACTIONS

Are they somehow all Saintly Victims of a cheating wife and her lover?

Or maybe they by their actions behaviour attitude also contributed to their wives looking elsewhere?

I vote for the Guiltless Victims Card.

Husbands after all are such perfect specimens in every way imaginable in your imaginary world.

No, but they are entitled to choosing if they want a wife who bangs the town *****.

 

OP is obviously a man of zero integrity and devoid of a conscience.

 

The perfect husbands
They do exist ?
Please show me one
Must be the son of a unicorn and mermaid
Rare breed

 

The perfect husbands
They do exist ?
Please show me one
Must be the son of a unicorn and mermaid
Rare breed

So the only people who should not be cheated on, betrayed and lied to… are perfect. I can see now why you’re afraid to be in a relationship.

 

If my post is troubling you simply ignore it and move on
I wish you well in your perfect saintly harmonius world you live in.
You are truly lucky even blessed
Coming here is a test of facing reality with maturity.

 

If my post is troubling you simply ignore it and move on
I wish you well in your perfect saintly harmonius world you live in.
You are truly lucky even blessed
Coming here is a test of facing reality with maturity.

Uh, huh, and sticking your resentful tongue at the British snobs, that you are determined to burn.

One man's way of getting even.
Yes, and enjoying of it.