Ask her.

Honestly, when will enough be enough?

 

But she has ignored the request. I know that she received it. What reason would someone have for not allowing or wanting their spouse to follow them on social media?

Doesnt she ignore all of your tequests on any subject? IMO a husband n wife should be an open book to one another. Secrets lead to misunderstandings at a minimum.

But your wife doesn’t care what you think about anything. If guessing wouldn’t be bit surprised if she was dragging you through dirt on SM.

 

She doesn’t want you to see the string of orbiters and guys she’s a goalie bamgimg on instagram, or the pics she’s posted of herself obviously fishing for some D.

geez you need to buy some RidX and De-louse,because your wife is lousy.

 

I'd hazard a guess she posts and shares a lot of stuff about how ****ty husbands and men are and she doesn't want you to see it.

 

I'd hazard a guess she posts and shares a lot of stuff about how ****ty husbands and men are and she doesn't want you to see it.

And her husband in particular. Are folks from his church on Instagram with her? Are they all laughing about OP behind his back?

 

I can't believe you're starting another complaint thread. C'mon man.

 

Not a complaint thread. It’s a legit question and I have my answer.

Thanks all!

 

The only reason to not allow you to follow her is she doesn't want you to see her posts, likes, etc., doesn't want you to see her followers or her followers to see you. Not much else. Have you tried asking her why she hasn't accepted your request?

 

I'm not biting.

 

Think you kinda just did.. 😊🤔

 

Only reason I see is she does not want you seeing her interactions with other guys or posting of inappropriate stuff.

 

How much more of her rudeness are you going to endure?

 

All of it. He is spineless to the core. That isn't enough though, he's helping shepherd his sons into a spineless future too. That is the really sad part of his situation. He can't even stand up to her when she tells her son she's not sure if she would be sad if he died.

On one hand I feel sorry for @deadsave because quite honestly I think he is a victim of spousal abuse. At the same time he has it within his power to do something, but he chooses to do absolutely nothing. Well, except ***** and moan about it on here.

 

His wife does whatever she pleases. She knows he isn’t going anywhere.

I wonder how many of her acquaintances have her slant on her marriage.

 

Man, either take action or quit complaining.

 

Sorry man, I've not once complained in this thread. I'm genuinely seeking understanding.

 

Has anyone considered that she may have "girlfriends" on Instagram with whom she flirts? Perhaps that's her reason for not letting @deadsave on her account.

 

How many here hide their TAM account from their SO, or family/friends?

 

Not I said the guy... 🫢

 

1 Corinthians 7: "Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time; that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control"

Self-control in this context means fidelity. It's also clear that husbands and wives are to submit to each other. IOW God wants married couples to have healthy sex lives - not that crap your wife is dishing out.

 

THANK YOU.

 

Look there’s redemptive suffering, which is virtuous and Christ commands us to take up our cross and follow him with, and there’s meaningless suffering that isn’t virtuous.

The crap you put up with from your wife is not redemptive suffering. There is nothing virtuous about it. You gain nothing from it. She most certainly doesn’t gain any virtue or grace from it. And if your kids learn this is normal they aren’t gaining anything from it.

Stop putting up with her crap.

 

I think you should ask her, she may have a reason for doing so.

 

Huge red flag. Wake up.

 

Considering your other threads ……..

Dude except the reality. At this point it has become you are the problem not her. It’s clear what she thinks of you.

 

I guess her account is set to private. Yea, not a good sign when you won’t add your spouse. I think Beyoncé only follows one account and it’s her husband’s. I wouldn’t go that far. lol

Your entire marriage is a red flag, deadsave. 😕

 

Check out the other thread on here about how many married people have a backup plan. I commented that you'll find the backup on their social media. This is why she does not want you on there.

 

Another woman yes. @deadsave IS her backup plan. Read her life history. She hates men in general. She has a damaged past and poor uphbringing. She has tried plenty if men and didn’t like any if them. She eloped with him asap once she caught him.

She gets all she wants of everything she cares about from @deadsave. He is a compliant provider and easily controlled. What could any other man give her that he doesn’t already?

 

@deadsave. Obviously shes hiding things from you ...I'm sure you must know that ?

 

She accepted my follow request as soon as I told her my account was private. She just didn't tell me and I didn't check until this morning. I may not know what I'm looking for, but she hasn't posted any content in almost a year. There were maybe 60 posts? Mostly sunsets, the kids, and maybe one G-rated selfie. Posts went back almost a decade. Before she permitted me to follow, the post number was the same.

I looked through all of the accounts she's following and they are all churches, designers, food, pastors, authors and friends/family. Very few men, all of whom I know. I looked at the followers and there were two gents on the list that I didn't recognize-both accounts "private". I intend to ask her about those guys. But their pictures were not at all what I would guess to be her type.

Maybe she was telling me the truth...the only reason she didn't allow it was because my profile wasn't private. Again, I'm not sure why that would matter since there isn't anything on my account.

Do I need to be looking somewhere else?

 

She accepted my follow request as soon as I told her my account was private. She just didn't tell me and I didn't check until this morning. I may not know what I'm looking for, but she hasn't posted any content in almost a year. There were maybe 60 posts? Mostly sunsets, the kids, and maybe one G-rated selfie. Posts went back almost a decade. Before she permitted me to follow, the post number was the same.

I looked through all of the accounts she's following and they are all churches, designers, food, pastors, authors and friends/family. Very few men, all of whom I know. I looked at the followers and there were two gents on the list that I didn't recognize-both accounts "private". I intend to ask her about those guys. But their pictures were not at all what I would guess to be her type.

Maybe she was telling me the truth...the only reason she didn't allow it was because my profile wasn't private. Again, I'm not sure why that would matter since there isn't anything on my account.

Do I need to be looking somewhere else?

Could be a nothing burger

Could be she cleared her profile before you saw it, don't know how to track that though

Either way I believe there should be transparency

He snapping back like she did kinda sends a bad message

 

I’ll say it again. If God wanted you to grow, have more strength, and become a leader. Maybe his way of doing that would be to put you with a woman that needed that strength in you. when you become that man, you both will know the meaning of one flesh.
Nothing will change until you do @deadsave

 

Oh come on.

Norhing OP does or doesn't do is going to change this woman's personality.

She doesn't even have love for her children.

Nothing is going to change her personality dysfunction.

 

Just my opinion. But I’m not convinced that deadsaves wife is necessarily repulsed by him. She absolutely feels superior to him him and expects everything to be her way.
Her selfishness is off the charts!
I personally feel that if DS would stand up to her and express that he will no longer accept anything less that an at minimum, a mutual marriage. She may soften a bit.
I also feel that from what I read. DS is far to focused on the sex part and she has drawn a line in the sand. I realize that she is not affectionate either.But that may be because if she is, it’s an automatic sex expectation. So she shuts that down as well.
I still think that if sex were completely taken off the table and the focus put on encouraging ( very slowly) intimacy and leadership. In time, things may change.
If not, then at least everything has been played out and DS will find the strength to accept it or leave it.

But it’s also possible that this is the coldest woman I’ve ever heard of and that may never change.

 

Just my opinion. But I’m not convinced that deadsaves wife is necessarily repulsed by him. She absolutely feels superior to him him and expects everything to be her way.
Her selfishness is off the charts!
I personally feel that if DS would stand up to her and express that he will no longer accept anything less that an at minimum, a mutual marriage. She may soften a bit.
I also feel that from what I read. DS is far to focused on the sex part and she has drawn a line in the sand. I realize that she is not affectionate either.But that may be because if she is, it’s an automatic sex expectation. So she shuts that down as well.
I still think that if sex were completely taken off the table and the focus put on encouraging ( very slowly) intimacy and leadership. In time, things may change.
If not, then at least everything has been played out and DS will find the strength to accept it or leave it.

But it’s also possible that this is the coldest woman I’ve ever heard of and that may never change.

And how do you explain her absolute lack of love for her children?

 

@deadsave she seemed to marry you fast.

I don't know why.

From everything I read, (if it's actually how you say it is) then I can tell you she's never going to desire you. Maybe she'll have sex with you and fantasize about someone else, but you're not the one she wants. I don't know if she's involved with someone else, she probably chats with different men; perhaps, she not interested in them at all. The only thing I know for certain is that she's not into you.

You can work out, be more assertive, learn some alpha guy games, etc. but you're not going to fool her. A woman knows if she wants a man within the first meeting. It's a passion that the man stirs in her body. Chemistry. It can't be manufactured.

At best, she'll have sex with you to keep the marriage. If you want to stay in this marriage you'll need to face the facts. You can forget about have sex with a woman who wants you and find other things in life you find meaningful.

 

but you're not the one she wants.

If you recall his story, you will see there is NO man that she “wants”. Her mother taught her sex was a dirty business. She had a domineering fathrr. She had a fair number of sexual partners during her teens and a lt BF before @deadsave . They didn’t even know one another before they eloped.

@deadsave has said she hates men. My suspicion is she arrived at age where she decidrd wss time to marry.,@deadsave was availsble and easily controlled. I suspect for her, a man. Is convenient to have around, but a nuisance.

Maybe because of her mother, sex is to be avoided as much as possible.