[walkonmars]

Devestating news for you.
Would be moreso if it turns out she paid for any part of his trip.

Forgetting the betrayal for a moment (as if it were possible) i'd hate to know that some scuzball (and his ilk) know where i live. Who knows what other personal info he has about you that you dont know about him.

 

[Baffled01]

Wow, this is a bad one. Alot of info missing though. 7 mos. pregnant and records of contact for at least 6 mos. Yeah, he could be the father.

Do you know if she invited him, or did he just seize the opportunity and show up at the door as soon as he found out you were out of town. He could be an airline employee or something and be able to hop on a flight anytime for free.

What site did they meet on,,, facebook, skype? Is he an old friend or just some sleeze from a Yahoo group of somethin'?

 

[Malaise]

Devestating news for you.
Would be moreso if it turns out she paid for any part of his trip.

Forgetting the betrayal for a moment (as if it were possible) i'd hate to know that some scuzball (and his ilk) know where i live. Who knows what other personal info he has about you that you dont know about him.

:iagree:

 

[Sara8]

Title says it all. I found out when I noticed her being all types of shady. Snooped in her email (bad I know but bite me). Found 6 months worth of chats and emails.

I went home to visit my sick brother on August 24th and was gone through Sunday. This dude flew in from Chicago and gets here Friday afternoon and they have a ****fest in our bed until Sunday AM. Its pretty ****ing disgusting. I confronted her with the barebones and after grilling her she finally confessed to all of this. Swears it was only this one time. Swears she has never cheated before.

We've only been married for 11 months. Who the **** cheats while pregnant and less than year of being married? I asked her why and she says she was lonely and he paid attention to her so she felt like she owed him. Apparently she never met him IRL until the ****fest.

I emailed this guy myself and he is a douche's douche. Blames me. I eventually say something to the effect of you can have her if you want. He says he doesn't care about her and that I can keep her. This is who she risked our family for. I don't know what his deal is. Its mind blowing to me that someone would pay for a flight ticket to have sex with some other man's pregnant wife. And not even lightly pregnant. My wife was 7 months pregnant at the time.

I don't know where to go from here. A strong part of me just wants to say **** this and bail. Get a quick divorce and let her raise the kid and pay child support. Just move the **** on. I don't see how our marriage can survive this.

She is outwardly remorseful but I had to catch her. She didn't confess anything. There are so many levels to her betrayal. In our home. In ourbed. While pregnant. With my child. Planned. More than once.

Has anyone been through anything like this? Is there any hope? Any advice?

TL : DR Pregnant wife had an affair while carrying my child.

I haven't yet read the entire thread.

Cheating this early in a marriage is a very bad sign, IMO.

Also, get a DNA on this pregnancy. She may have cheated prior.

You are right there are so many levels of disrespect here.

Most men who cheat do not want to marry the affair partners. They just want a little extra curricular sex.

Very often, too, as I found out by reading the OW's emails to my STBEH, the housewives, usually bored and without the ability to keep their mind's occupied on their own,,are throwing themselves at other married men, and practically begging for sex.

Cheating housewives with children seems to have risen dramatically in the past ten years, by my observation and according several EDU studies.

It may be the internet, it may be shows like desperate housewives.

Sorry you are here.

 

[Baffled01]

One other thing is most OB's don't recommend sex beyond the 7th month for pregnant women, and then add sleeping with a sleezy stranger who probably sleeps with other women as well really has put that baby in danger.

 

[Sara8]

Whoooa , not only cheated but but put the baby at risk for catching an STD. Get a Divorce and a Paternity test. This women is trash and a simple minded gardening tool.

Yes, the STD thing is sick. Some viruses can go through condoms and can damage a baby. Herpes can do great harm to a baby if it is caught prior to being born.

If the child does turn out to be your child, you may be able to get full custody based on her irresponsible behavior.

I am so sorry.

Why do we BS's always seemed to be blind sided by this behavior.

I am not an ignorant unaware person, and I can't believe I was fooled for so long and even after Dday my spouse was making a fool of me.

 

[Kallan Pavithran]

The worst women a man can have, A rare piece of women who dosent worry about her child born as HIV+ve, A rare women who can bang some one from internet who never told her the truth (As none says truth when they are dating thru internet), A rare women who can plan and commit the heinous act of sh!tting on her marital bed. Even wh0res worry about her child.

But the question is do you want to be with this women for another second?

It will be very tough for you to find an excuse for staying with her....................

 

[survivorwife]

One other thing is most OB's don't recommend sex beyond the 7th month for pregnant women, and then add sleeping with a sleezy stranger who probably sleeps with other women as well really has put that baby in danger.

Unless the "sleezy stranger" is actually the baby's daddy and is no "stranger" at all.

 

[Shaggy]

That was the kid's father in your bed with her. there is no way, no way at all that this was one time.

Think about it, the two of you planned and worked to have the kid. And ONE month later she's on the Internet meeting a guy to start emailing and planning a hookup with?

And he jumps on a plane to fly in for a weekend just like that?

--

Question: How did they meet?

Question: Is he married or have a gf? - DO not listen to him or your wife - find out. Hire a PI if you have to, but find out this guy's shoe size. AND Expose him. At a minimum exposing to his mother that he's a sleazy loser that flys in to do this stuff should humiliate him to his mother. But if her has a wife/gf - it will really hit home.

As for your wife - YOU need to see a lawyer immediately. I would also take her to the doctor with you in the room and explain what she has done and that you demand: 1) STD tests, 2) DNA test on the child. Do it with your wife and doctor in the room together.

Today - take the bed and throw it out, and buy yourself a new one for you bedroom. If you feel kind - buy a new twin bed for another room for your wife to sleep on.

Take the clothes and lingerie she wore for him and throw them out.

Even if the child is yours, I would file for D. What she did was so cold and heartless. It's so off the scale that I think what you've caught is her real lifestyle. Pregnant women at 7 months do not fly in guys for a sex-fest. They just don't. The way she was able to do it, without tipping you off before you left , and able to lie when you called while gone , reveal that this IS NOT her first time cheating. No first time cheater would be that cold or calculating.

Get that DNA test.

Expose the OM.

Expose your wife.


File for D - If the child is yours you can be a good dad and be divorced.

 

[SweetAndSour]

Don't count on her story a bit.

The whole chicago story may be a total bullsh!t. He may be next door, saying hi to you everyday.

"It happend just once" is a common lie that waywards commonly stick to.

Or there may really be another guy in chicago that you caught but....

 

[naga75]

kinda been through it, yes.
my wife carried on an affair for over a year with a married douche she met at the gym.
while pregnant. she quit with him (supposedly...according to his wife...who knew about it a year ago and never had the common fkn decency to let me know) from her 5th month till a few months after our daughter was born.
yes she is my daughter. she looks exactly like me, not, thankfully, like the peanut head ugly fk my wife was banging.
never, once again SUPPOSEDLY, in our bed or house, but pretty much anywhere and everywhere else.
subjected herself, me and our child to a chlamydia scare, because @sshat was banging another girl that ended up with it. funny thing is, my wife and him kept at it even after that. sick, huh?
i havent posted my tale here yet, still trying to process it myself.
i chose to stay. i wonder sometimes when i am angry, if i made the right choice. and im angry a lot. but i think it speaks volumes of MY character to stay and work through a seemingly impossible situation.
i have thought about it long and deeply, and my wife seems to be truly remorseful and trying to put forth a real effort. finally, after catching her in lie after lie and essentially telling the OM that if he didnt leave my wife alone he would be drooling on himself and wearing diapers for the rest of his life, i think they have stopped all contact.
"think" being the operative word here.
one day i will post my whole story on here to be dissected by the experts.
until then, i just wanted to chime in and say YES, there are other people that have been through something like this.
think about your choices. carefully. dont be afraid to be alone. and dont be afraid to be a single dad.
good luck man, its a long painful road no matter your decision.

 

[GotMeWonderingNow]

naga75 - it sounds like you should start a thread. Just writing stuff down and getting feedback can be therapeutic. I'd hate to be bottling that stuff up. Good to see you made your first post in any case.

 

[Entropy3000]

One other thing is most OB's don't recommend sex beyond the 7th month for pregnant women, and then add sleeping with a sleezy stranger who probably sleeps with other women as well really has put that baby in danger.

Let alone taking the chance for a stranger to beat her up and hurt the baby more directly. Or worse.

 

[lordmayhem]

Unless, like others have said, this is no stranger.

 

[SadSamIAm]

I don't believe her story, but even if it is true, you need to do the same things:

1) End the marriage
2) Expose. If anyone close to her asks why, tell them the truth. You wife needs to feel consequences for what she has done.
3) DNA test to see if the baby is yours
4) If the baby is yours, be a father. If the baby isn't yours, then never look back.

If your marriage is salvageable, this is the only way to make it work. Ending the marriage and exposing will ensure your wife knows you won't put up with cheating. If you don't do this, and let her off easy, she will surely cheat her next opportunity.

Her actions and attitude once you take action will show how she truly feels about you. End the marriage, move on, and maybe after a few months she will have earned your respect again and will deserve another chance.

 

[KanDo]

I am so sorry you are here. I am also sorry for your (maybe) unborn child. You are perhaps in the worst possible situation. At 11 months of marriage you should still be in the honeymoon phase. I would divorce her. As already stated, get the kid DNA checked before your on the hook for the child support. I agree that this is very unlikely to be her first rodeo.....
Get out whle you can with little damage.

 

[Kallan Pavithran]

Did you exposed her? Do it else she will make up some story of you abandoning her during her pregnancy.
Did you done the STD check up?

 

[Vanguard]

Throw her out. Now. What a piece of sh*t.

As others have already stated, she's lying to you- this is not the first time she's cheated on you. Tell everyone, right now. Tell her family, your family and all your mutual friends.

I am so, so sorry for what you're going through, brother. It is worse than any other pain you could ever experience. But DON'T allow her to escape the consequence of what she has done. Divorce her now. If you try to make this work you will spend the rest of your life looking over your shoulder. You will spend the rest of your life wondering if she's really going to the store.

Don't tell her you're going to do anything- just do it. Let her figure out what's going on. Divorce her pompous, self-entitled butt, and kick her out. In ten years you will be begging me to let you buy me a drink.

You do NOT want to raise a child with this "woman."

 

[MrQuatto]

As many others have said on these boards before, "you know a cheater is lying because their lips are moving."

I would be SHOCKED if it were any different in this instance.

Test test test and you might dig more into emails, txt messages and such. You might find more of the truth.

Q~

 

[Jonesey]

My first reaction was "who has sex with a 7 month pregnant woman?".. That's right... the father. Was thinking the same..There might be exceptions but you know very well that you must get a DNA test asap. This is just to see if the kid is yours.This is to freaky. i mean 7 months pregnant.
I have libido like the next one..But flying out long distance ,to F..k
with someone who is 7 mont pre go..WTF..To freaky..

OP PLEASE DIG DEEPER IN this..Check phone record´s key logg computer.. Place VAR (VoiceAcrivatedRecorder) In every room.

Furthermore... Who pays 4 or 5 hundred dollars for a ticket and flies over for a romp?... Her lover.Actually you would be surprised..How desperate Somme Dochbags really are..I use to believe ,before Like no way..BUT.. It quite possible that she's been cheating on you through out your relationship and this woman doesn't appear to be wife material.

Would not be overly surprised ,if it turned out that way
I do understand when people have affairs after 10 or 20 years of marriage.... But 11 months? No.

She's either not playing with a full deck or she's giving you a ride... And if you stay, the ride will at one point resume.