Hey folks. So I've finally decided to write out my full story. I had hit on some of it when I first joined. Granted I was all over the place emotionally at that time.
It's a long one and I'm going to be short about each area of it and discuss or answer questions that may come in more detail.
PART 1. We have been married 40 years; fact. I served in the Navy for 20 years, 6 months and 9 days. Retired in 2003. Fact. I am who I say I am,fact. I have never trolled anyone here. Fact. Here goes.
I'll begin sort of in the middle. Was in the summer of 1998. I was stationed.in Everett, Washington on a Destroyer. We had a learning resource center, with computers. What a concept. The internet was pretty new to alot, in it's infancy. Email was king. Cell phones were basic dumb phones. No texting as yet. Chat rooms seemed to be the rage. One on my workers goaded.me into opening an email account, so I was learning.i discovered chat rooms, it was a novel idea. I frequented one site in particular. Started chatting in open rooms with a specific person often, often enough to create our own private room.
Had been married 14 years at this point. No home PC. So anyway, I'd hit the chat room on lunch breaks or on duty nights. The other person was a woman. I'm sure you know now where this went. Got in to deep. Remember all was done through chat. Never have i seen what she looked like or met IRL. She wanted to meet. I freaked out. Told the wife about it. Didn't defend what I did. Felt horrid for it. I was completely honest, even went the to the site and opened up the room and let her go through all the messages. To say she was hurt was an understatement. There were never any I love you's or talk of leaving our partners. Just mundane things and sexual fantasy talk. My wife had been worried something was up with me, and unbeknownst to me 2 days before this she and her niece had cracked my email at her sister's house and found this. So there was the added humiliation and shame she endured at the both of them seeing this as well! The next couple months were very rough with us, obviously. I never evaded any questions. I took all her anger and lashing out, I deserved it. However we never talked of splitting up.
This was something very uncharacteristic for me. No matter what, it was what is called today, an EA. I still feel a deep shame inside to this day. Now a couple months later I deployed on a 6 month forward deployment to the Persian Gulf. Slowly things normalized over the next year or so. If she has ever to this day asked anything of it, I do my best to answer, given the length of time, to the best of my ability.
OK, so that cats out of the bag now, I cheated. No other way to say it! But wait, there's more, much more to this. I will contnue over several posts to today's current issues.
It's a long one and I'm going to be short about each area of it and discuss or answer questions that may come in more detail.
PART 1. We have been married 40 years; fact. I served in the Navy for 20 years, 6 months and 9 days. Retired in 2003. Fact. I am who I say I am,fact. I have never trolled anyone here. Fact. Here goes.
I'll begin sort of in the middle. Was in the summer of 1998. I was stationed.in Everett, Washington on a Destroyer. We had a learning resource center, with computers. What a concept. The internet was pretty new to alot, in it's infancy. Email was king. Cell phones were basic dumb phones. No texting as yet. Chat rooms seemed to be the rage. One on my workers goaded.me into opening an email account, so I was learning.i discovered chat rooms, it was a novel idea. I frequented one site in particular. Started chatting in open rooms with a specific person often, often enough to create our own private room.
Had been married 14 years at this point. No home PC. So anyway, I'd hit the chat room on lunch breaks or on duty nights. The other person was a woman. I'm sure you know now where this went. Got in to deep. Remember all was done through chat. Never have i seen what she looked like or met IRL. She wanted to meet. I freaked out. Told the wife about it. Didn't defend what I did. Felt horrid for it. I was completely honest, even went the to the site and opened up the room and let her go through all the messages. To say she was hurt was an understatement. There were never any I love you's or talk of leaving our partners. Just mundane things and sexual fantasy talk. My wife had been worried something was up with me, and unbeknownst to me 2 days before this she and her niece had cracked my email at her sister's house and found this. So there was the added humiliation and shame she endured at the both of them seeing this as well! The next couple months were very rough with us, obviously. I never evaded any questions. I took all her anger and lashing out, I deserved it. However we never talked of splitting up.
This was something very uncharacteristic for me. No matter what, it was what is called today, an EA. I still feel a deep shame inside to this day. Now a couple months later I deployed on a 6 month forward deployment to the Persian Gulf. Slowly things normalized over the next year or so. If she has ever to this day asked anything of it, I do my best to answer, given the length of time, to the best of my ability.
OK, so that cats out of the bag now, I cheated. No other way to say it! But wait, there's more, much more to this. I will contnue over several posts to today's current issues.
