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Discussion Starter #1
I've been talking with a female friend about taking a road trip. We're not entirely serious about our plans, but I wanted to ask if it would be odd to take said trip without my husband.

So would you feel slighted if your partner wanted to take a trip with a friend? Would it matter if it was family? Does it matter the length of the trip, the destination or the people they're going with?
 

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I think it is all in the works. If my wife "told me" she was leaving on a trip I would be more then hurt. If she asked if we could arraign something for her to go somewhere that would be different. I would object to her going with the opposite sex unless it was family. Additionally, the less I knew about someone the more I'd dislike the idea. I'd also want to know what I have to plan for. Where is she going, how is she getting there, when will she be back. Length of the trip would matter because to watch the kids I'd have to make all kinds of plans to cover the time she wasn't home. If we didn't have kids It would be very different. But the commitment to the family has to come first. I think taking time to yourself can be helpful. The real question is what is stopping your other half from going? Their work or lack of interest?

draconis
 

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Discussion Starter #3
Nothing is stopping him from going. In fact, if I let him he'd go on every social gathering of mine. Sometimes I feel like I just want some time with friends--without him. I never mind when he goes and does stuff with his male friends or has lunches with female friends without me.

You never feel like having a time away from your significant other?

Oh and no kids.
 

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Discussion Starter #5
Hm. Okay. Was a random question.

I'm not really serious about this trip because there is more to it and taking this trip would be definitely unfair with the extra information in it. I was just curious how the basic scenario sounded.

I do wish I could take a girl's vacation or night out sometime without making the hubby feel slighted. :(

Interesting that there is more in your situation.
 

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Okay her goes. I own my own store. The wife works 40+ hours and goes to college full time. I do all the house work etc. So we plan time to be together and make the most of every minute we can share. Being away means one of us has to give up something to watch the young ones. It would be unfair for me to have to close the store so she can go out without me, or she miss work/college so I can go off. We have had times when we have done it. But to us we feel that it is important to invite the other person. If she took a night off from work to go see Kenny G in concert I'd have no problem watching the kids. If I had a store function that required me to travel (which I have) she has no problem with me going (even though it is always offered to her too. last year because both of us could not go I didn't.)

Like I said it depends on so many factors and everything has to be planned out because we juggle so much and the little free time we have is normally the "US" time.

draconis
 

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i personally wouldnt have a problem with it, as long as he let me know in good time so i could arrange everything (i dont drive at the moment so my partner drops me at work, we live 45 miles away from the nearest town)
i would wonder why i wasnt able to go along too, but i would also realize that even though you are in a relationship, people still need time out every now and then if it is possible.
i wouldnt have a problem with the length of time he was away as long as it wasnt 2 months or something, him going with a member of the opposite sex would be a no no unless it was a group of mixed sex friends, if it was just him and his friends/friend i wouldnt have a problem at all.
 

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A long time college friend and I have planned a cruise for our "40th" birthday since our 20th birthday. This is something the two of us decided on prior to our being married, kids. etc. I think it depends on the relationship you have with your spouse and what kind of relationship your partner has with their friend and where the person is male or female.
 

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A long time college friend and I have planned a cruise for our "40th" birthday since our 20th birthday. This is something the two of us decided on prior to our being married, kids. etc. I think it depends on the relationship you have with your spouse and what kind of relationship your partner has with their friend and where the person is male or female.
I concur, but there is a difference in something set up and planned for a time and let me grab the coat you are babysitting this weekend while I go upstate.

draconis
 

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I know it sounds bad, but I would have a real problem if my wife wanted to go on a trip with someone of the opposite sex for more then just going to the mall.
draconis
:scratchhead: Hmmm, and why do you think that would sound bad? That would be a normal reaction, methinks. :) There are marriages falling apart all over the place... and I suspect a lot of it is because people are TOO liberal with things like this for some reason lately. A business trip that can't be rearranged might be an exception, but a vacation? I just can't see it. And why would a spouse want to do that anyhow?
 

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:scratchhead: Hmmm, and why do you think that would sound bad? That would be a normal reaction, methinks. :) There are marriages falling apart all over the place... and I suspect a lot of it is because people are TOO liberal with things like this for some reason lately. A business trip that can't be rearranged might be an exception, but a vacation? I just can't see it. And why would a spouse want to do that anyhow?
Well the wife and I are on the same page with it thankfully. Maybe you are right way to many people are too liberal when it comes to such a thing.

draconis
 

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So would you feel slighted if your partner wanted to take a trip with a friend?
Not in the least, for after 21 years of marriage I personally could do with out hubby for a couple of days or even a full week...... it might even help the heart grow fonder and (btw) trip buddy must male only.

IMO - I think the length of time one has been together in the relationship has a lot to do with how one will feel if they were left alone by the other partner.
 

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Not in the least, for after 21 years of marriage I personally could do with out hubby for a couple of days or even a full week...... it might even help the heart grow fonder and (btw) trip buddy must male only.

IMO - I think the length of time one has been together in the relationship has a lot to do with how one will feel if they were left alone by the other partner.

Has he or you ever done that? Taken a trip?

draconis
 

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hmm, i think i'd feel a bit hurt yeah... he's considering hols end of the year... and i'm just settling down in a new job, so can't take any leave. so yeah, it is kind of upsetting. but last night he said that he won't be doing it... i'm still trying to figure out if he's saying that just to make me feel better or if he realised that i was disappointed... i tried asking him, but he doesn't really want to talk about it. so am not pushing.
 

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hmm, i think i'd feel a bit hurt yeah... he's considering hols end of the year... and i'm just settling down in a new job, so can't take any leave. so yeah, it is kind of upsetting. but last night he said that he won't be doing it... i'm still trying to figure out if he's saying that just to make me feel better or if he realised that i was disappointed... i tried asking him, but he doesn't really want to talk about it. so am not pushing.
Good for him, in time the both of you can look at taking a trip together. I have passed at chances because the wife couldn't go with me. I'd rather have my wife to share it with anyways.

draconis
 

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Discussion Starter #19
Just a small update.

I broached the subject with my husband about taking the trip with friend. He seems like he'd grudgingly allow it, but I could tell he didn't like the idea at all.

Oh well. Kinda sad about that, but it's what I expected. :p
 
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