He didn't just wake up and become a narcissist. The reason why he was interested in your in the first place was partly to do with your age difference. He thought he could control you from the beginning, but when you cheated he saw he couldn't and he tightened the screws and took out every trick in the book to make you believe everything he is saying to you, but the fact is; he is lying to you. He has filled your head with lies.This morning I read a website called ’25 Signs of a Covert Passive-Aggressive Narcissist’ on lifelessons.co and all of them fit…. He’s my husband though. I shouldn’t be thinking like that. It doesn’t change my marriage. I’m probably wrong anyway.
As a women's health nurse I have to tell you that I'm starting to think this man drugged you in addition to getting you drunk. Your spotty memory is very suspicious. The last time I said this to someone she went to the hospital and tested positive for rohypnol after swearing to me up and down that it just wasn't possible. That test saved her marriage. I wish someone had told you to get tested 3 1/2 years ago.Is that normal? He wasn’t mad that the other guy had sex with me while I was way too drunk. The other guy made sure I always had a drink in my hand. I know drinking isn’t an excuse. I don’t use it as one.
Kexpo, how was your marriage before you cheated? was your husband equally as controlling? Making you sign a pre-nup agreement when you were only 18 sounds terrible.My husband won’t do counselling. He doesn’t like it. We did counselling 7 years ago. It went well and our marriage was better. I cheated and we went back 3 or 4 times. He hated it and refuses to go again. He won’t let me go by myself. It helped before so I wish he would try again….
My husband is 5 years older than I am. We had our first when I was 17. We married when I was 18. He was almost 23.
Our kids are 12, 11, 2 and I’m 24 weeks pregnant.
My MIL and FIL put my husband through school. He comes from a family of lawyers. His family owns a law firm. My MIL retired last year but my husband works with my FIL, BIL and my husband’s uncle.
I have a degree. I have barely used it though. It’s in our prenup that our debt isn’t shared. I racked up student debt because it took me longer than normal to finish. Even though we could pay off the student loans my husband doesn’t want to. I don’t think there are any good lawyers left that I could see. My husband said he left the bad ones for me. That’s my fault though….
He could be having relationships with other women? Not only ONS’s or less? Real relationships? He went out last night from 12-3. Who goes out at midnight on a Tuesday…. He comes home and wants to have sex though.... He wouldn't if he had just had it right? I need him to be with only me…. I’m trying to make it up to him. I do everything he tells me to....
My husband wouldn’t set his then-friend to have sex with me right? No one would do that right? My husband was mad at the other guy too and they are not friends anymore. He was mad that the guy didn’t use a condom, that we had sex 3 times and a way we did it…. He was more mad at those particular details than the sex itself. Is that normal? He wasn’t mad that the other guy had sex with me while I was way too drunk. The other guy made sure I always had a drink in my hand. I know drinking isn’t an excuse. I don’t use it as one.
When my husband is mad his anger fills the room. He doesn’t hit or yell though. I don’t know what I would do if he hit me though…. I know hitting isn’t okay. He wouldn't. It would be my fault if he did. I feel stuck….
I would never treat him the way he treats me…. Our prenup doesn’t affect child support or custody. I wouldn’t get spousal support. My MIL and FIL made sure the prenup would be airtight. The lawyer I saw said not to sign it…. I was 18. I didn’t think my life would look like this…. Now I’m stuck. We have 3 children together and I’m pregnant. He GPS tracks my phone and vehicle. He records my calls and checks what numbers I call. He looks through my phone. He’d know if I went and talked to a lawyer. I’ll have a bad lawyer. Divorcing him scares me…. That could be worse than this. I don’t want to give up on him. I caused this…. Things could get better.
His family doesn’t know what my marriage is like. We don’t ever fight in public. If something happens in public we deal with it when we’re home. He acts different when we’re alone. People think he’s a good guy and husband. My parents think he’s great and say I’m lucky to have him. He treats everyone else well and people love him. It’s just me…. It’s because I cheated on him.
This morning I read a website called ’25 Signs of a Covert Passive-Aggressive Narcissist’ on lifelessons.co and all of them fit…. He’s my husband though. I shouldn’t be thinking like that. It doesn’t change my marriage. I’m probably wrong anyway.
I want to do something…. I don’t know what to do. I’ve learned to not even say no to anything. I don’t know how to even talk to him. We have a family. I married him to be with him. I didn’t want this or to divorce…. I already threw it away and it’s horrible…. I don’t want to make my life worse by throwing away the rest….
You sound like a victim, you are NOT a victim, please do something to help yourself. You have young kids who are depending on their mother, young daughters who will one day look up to their mother, what are YOU going to do about it?I shouldn't have come here. I'm sorry... I'll go. This was a mistake.
It's sound like after the first time she was too inebriated to say yes or no. The first time doesn't sound like that as she tells it. Freezing from surprise though unfortunate is not the same in my mind.I’m not so sure you weren’t raped, were you actually in a position to say NO? I think seeing a therapist to talk through the sex with the OM might be enlighten8ng, some cognitive work or even hypnotherapy?