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I haven't read Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs ... but I sure heard wonderful things about it.. the reviews on Amazon are outstanding & well over 1,500 !.. Sounds a phenomenal book to read for any couple starting out ....or tying to improve their relationship...

I wrote a little on respect in another thread.. ..

One wife said "‘I think that basically, you can’t just be in love with a man. I think you have got to admire him and like him."

Just a handful...

* When listening to him... be approachable, ask questions, show interest..even if you may not agree, try to understand his point of view...

* Find out what Domestic Support looks like to him & do the things that matter to him.

* If things are a little stressful, ask if there is anything you can do for him...and do it.

* Help him de-tox from his day by providing a quiet, calm environment for him to come home to.

* Try not to get frustrated if he doesn't express his feelings well as you would..

* Understand he may need some cave time or time with his friends.. allow him this..

* Do not interrupt him in conversation, speak over him.. or finish his sentences...NEVER demean him in public, or in front of friends, co-workers, relatives.

* When he has good insight, let him know, when he does something generous, acknowledge it, encourage him in his endeavors..

The respect we show for our husbands should be based on our desire to love them the way they need to be loved. It's recognizing what's important to THEM (whether or not we fully understand it). It's looking "not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others". ...otherwise it goes something like this >>
...if you click on this link.. Respect your Husband ..you can read about the 3 cycles (Crazy, Energizing & Rewarded) ...

101 Ways to Respect Your Husband

Disrespect borders "emasculating" our men ... When a man feels emasculated ..
There are some disagreements on whether one can emasculate a man..I feel we can make our men "FEEL that way" by our actions / disrespect / reactions.. some men may be unmovable.. I can't say mine is like this.. although he is not one to complain or show emotion in a negative sense.... he is very controlled...yet my actions & how I treat him DO effect him & his outlook on us , our lives together.. whether that be "so /so" ...drudgery or something he enjoys coming home to, treasuring our time together...

I like these 3 sayings...

 

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What is considered housework? If men are performing "mommy duties" then yes women wont respect a man as time progresses. It definitely doesnt get the panties wet.

If by house work we are talking manly duties such as fixing things, whilst wearing a carhatt jacket and levi's, the yes a blueberry pie might be waiting on the windowsill along with a sexual treat.

How many times do we see women ration out sex for completing a task around the house. It's definitely not for folding laundry or washing windows. Its usually fixing something that has been deemed as a male oriented task.

A dishwashing male is a new age phenomenon. Whatever happened to the supermoms? Who worked a full time job, made dinner, cooked and cleaned with no complaints? It seems that element is missing in life. Now there is this whole equal opportunity home lifestyle, where over time the man becomes a Daddigan aka another child. They become drones and slaves to her. Jokes about who's the boss of the house bandied about to friends and family at get togethers. The woman resents him for not pulling up his gonads and she finds another man to fulfill her.

Women arent looking for a man to sparkle the china.
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I don't get this idea that women are not attracted to men who do housework. My attraction to my husband has never decreased upon seeing him do housework. If anything, it makes me feel more loved. And when I feel loved, I want to be close.
 

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Hello,

I am completely in love with my fiancee and want to make sure I do everything I can to help create the happy marriage we both deserve. I feel like mutual respect is a huge component of a healthy marriage. I'm trying to learn what kinds of things make women gain respect and lose respect for their husbands (perhaps this happens gradually over time) in order to make sure I don't unconsciously contribute to a gradual decline in mutual respect for one another.

I understand the importance of sharing chores such as laundry, cleaning the house, cooking dinner, buying groceries, etc.. etc… I make sure to help as much as possible with those items.



P.S. Have any of you ever read "Love & Respect" by Emmerson Eggerichs. I would love to get a lot of thoughts on the book and its content.

I read the book. But prior to my current marriage. I got a lot out of it and learned a lot. I would recommend couples reading it. I think there are DVDs available. You need to show love to your wife and she needs to feel it before she will show respect to her man. Avoid the cycle!!!
 

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You need to show love to your wife and she needs to feel it before she will show respect to her man.
:iagree: It starts with the husband.
 

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That could end up in an infinite loop if said wife is unable or unwilling to feel said love... You can't love someone and simply settle in that they may love you back.
 
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