I think you are correct being that your wife should not be going out with your friend without you being there. Married people should hang out with married people. I don't think that you are being insecure at all.
If my husband had never been out with women I would never go out with men. Nope, U r not insecure, its the natural feeling. Having said that, does your wife gets enough time to go out with her friends like u do? if so why would she complain that she doesnt get to go out?