Hi, I'm Joe. I just got married to my lovely wife for 5 months.
A little background on the both of us: Me and my wife are in our mid 20's. I met her on a dating site. I visited her couple of times within the 3yrs that we dated before we decided to get married. Roughly, 4-5 times a year from my part. She visited me about 1-2 a year. To sum it up, we met with each other at least 5-7 times each year and each meetings consisted of at least a week. I usually go see her for 2-3 weeks. Aside from the expensive travel meet-ups, most of the time we called and talked on the phone, we facetime or webcam with the new gadget of today's technology. I made sure the first person I talked to after waking up was her and the last person I talked to before going to bed was her, since it was a long distance relationship.
No one had hope for our relationship. They thought online dating was a hoax or maybe something that never works out. I personally did not really care and went with my heart because I've been in about 3 relationships already. Her family were against me, maybe her whole relatives were against me but we got passed that stage. She loved me and we took the big step and she relocated to where I live.
I laid out the grounds, that she cannot say anything about me smoking, drinking, going to starbucks or getting rid of my car. I smoke 1-2pack a week
. Seldom in the car. Never in the house. I usually smoke at Starbucks. I drink every other week or once a month with the guys and watching football while they bet on the games (I don't though). I seldom buy beer, only when I drink with the brothers. I go to starbucks everyday and she's fine with it because coffee heals my soul and its a good laxative to help me with my bowel-movement in aiding me with hemorrhoid. I guess I did a pretty good job in laying those down and she don't have a problem with it.
However, the problem begins when I start going to casino......:scratchhead: I don't see a problem in that. Maybe, I'm missing something here but I get free rides, free meals, and free monies (usually $100-200 each time) to play! It's a win win situation and I love playing poker. If I win, I split. If my buddy wins, he split and I'm not loosing a dime! She thinks gambling is a sin!
The church do bingo and raffles and I know some pastor do lottery-tickets and such and I believe it's not a sin. The bible does not clearly state anything regarding that. Only thing the bible talks about is the love for money and I only go to casino
every other week so I mostly go because I like poker and winning a little extra cash while i have entertainment, it is like killing 2 birds with 1 stone. It's not like I'm cheating on her or I'm not paying the bills. I pay all the bills and the gasoline and the food. I am her sole provider!! She want's something, I could get it. She wants to go anywhere I take her but she request I don't go there
It got to the level that I decided to I leave all my credit cards and debit at home even showing all my bill statement and savings. I take nothing but my driver's license and a player's card to go and I only go casino maybe twice a month since it's a far drive and I don't even drive!! I told her many times, love is loving, not controlling. When is loving or caring becomes controlling? I go empty handed and sometime bringing home some money. In this economy, it's hard making money and I'm down to whatever that makes money. I scrap, I sell on ebay, I sell on glyde, I sell on craiglist, I do whatever it takes to make money to save. So far, we've been saving good and she just got a job. I wake up everyday before the sun rises to drive her to work and picks her up everyday in my v8 and I don't mind the gas guzzling and the distance in the super heavy traffic. I give her some money if she decided to eat somewhere instead of the prepared lunch and or emergency. Money is not the issue!
She just don't want me to go casino
....she went with me couple times but since she got a job she don't go anymore. She told me not to go for money or gamble "we have enough money, there's no need for casino." I told her I go for poker, and money is extra for paying for bills months ahead or whatever dresses she wish to get. It's just extra. It's not like I"m going to parties popping bottles wasting hundreds for entertainment.
I'm not alcoholic and I don't smoke 3 packs a day. I been doing this for at least 7 years, and 4 years before I know her. My pace and habit stays the same but casino is something new....I should have laid this out before we got married....
Sometime, she puts up a puppy face and sometime I decided not to go :/ but I would love to know what is her problem with casino? It's like I'm going to war and getting ready to die for her.... We sat down and talked and always ended up in arguments...and she even threatened to divorce!! "I don't want to marry someone that gambles, later you're going to sell the house, the car, the tv, etc..."
We had this talked for awhile now, maybe 2-3 months. She hates me going to casino. It's like I'm going to hell or something...I'm the Christian one here. She's the one that got converted to Christianity and now she believes shes a saint and I'm the devil.....
when did this happened?
I'm just there because I love playing poker, its a hobby and whatever blesses me while playing is something I would appreciate but wouldn't die for.
What I forgot to tell her was about me going to casino once in awhile for fun playing poker. A big mistake on my part but it's ok, I'm writing this in need of help...I could give up poker but what could drive her not to feel like it's a sin or something....It's one entertainment I love most. I don't go clubs, bars, or strip clubs or do any drugs. What's the problem? Am I blind or something?