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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi guys, Im new here. I was searching the internet for a support group such as this because I am really desperate about my wife's situation. My wife an i are married for 5 years already and during the time where we had a financial crisis. She was introduced to MLM (Multi Level Marketing) we were promised a lot including riches and financial freedom. Freedom from employment etc.. My wife took me to this seminar and sadly i was convinced and decided to quit my job and pursue this MLM. To cut to the chase things didnt go well, we were evicted from our house, I dont even have a single cent to buy a milk for my kid whos during that time was only 2 years old. and i decided that this should not happen again so i went back to the folds of employment and I asked my wife to stop engaging with those MLM folks. My work flourished and we were able to get our lives again for 2 years i worked my ass off just to get to where we are right now. Little that i know that my wife is still engaged with the MLM. 1 day she asked me if she can have money since she wants to start MLM again and she already learn from her mistakes so i went for it and gave her what she needs because i love her and even though i don't buy the idea of going back to MLM but still because my wife is so confident that we would be earning more so i went for it.Our agreement was she has to pay every penny that she borrowed from our savings soon and i noticed all of our savings is gone and i asked her about it she said she invested it with MLM and my company closed down so in short i have no work again. luckily i used to work in a call center before and i was an I.T i landed a home based job. it pays fairly well and it would suffice our daily needs but my wife who still addicted to MLM wants my whole salary to be invested. I told her we already failed and lost huge amount of money because of this and there are bills that needs to be paid and loans that you applied that i need to pay as well (the loaned money to invest yet again)I just dont know what to do with her anymore. I dont want to leave her because i love her i just want her to get out of that MLM.
 

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OMG... no advice, only to chime in. I feel for what you're going through.

I have a friend who is on her TENTH MLM scam... She has shelled out thousands of dollars to buy the "inventory kit"... only to lose her investment because she never sells a d*mn thing!!

And her husband just keeps shelling out the money to buy into the next scam.

Her "office" is a graveyard of Mary Kay, Monavie, Rodan & Fields, 31, Longaberger, Party-Lite Candles, Pampered Chef, Amway, Shaklee, and "Jewelry" products...
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Thanks for the reply. I am really desperate on how to get her mind out of MLM. there are times that i want strangle all her friends who encouraged her to invest. i notified my bank and told them not to entertain any more withdrawals from her. I am really fed up. with just had an argument earlier today. My salary is due to arrive tom from paypal and she wants to borrow everything so she can buy products and promised me again that she would pay it back. I just cant do that i told her. We have a lot of bills to pay loans that she applied and sadly i am the one who's paying. I dont know how long i can keep. To be honest sometimes I just dont want to see her and only then i would get some sanity.
 

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Your wife needs help. Any therapy that helps deal with addiction can help.

You need to take control and cut her off.

Unfortunately, addictions can often destroy a marriage. Life will be unpleasant for you to stand up to her but she will destroy you and your children if you don't.

Have you told her she has a problem and needs help?
 

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Mykice...

Don't fall for it again! It's an endless marketing ploy, and your wife is prime for the picking of available suckers. (Sorry to be harsh, but true.)

These MLMs know JUST the personality type that will fall for "the next best thing"... sadly, your wife is in the bullseye.

Stop throwing good money after bad... you know where it gets you --> further in the hole. She will never sell the products. She will never "pay you back."
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Your wife needs help. Any therapy that helps deal with addiction can help.

You need to take control and cut her off.

Unfortunately, addictions can often destroy a marriage. Life will be unpleasant for you to stand up to her but she will destroy you and your children if you don't.

Have you told her she has a problem and needs help?
yeah many times I told her that she needs help at the end of the day we only solved nothing. she keeps insisting that these MLM is the true way for us to be free financially. I wish there are laws that would put this MLM down the drain.that's what i am planning to do to cut her from having money. She was offered a part time job which pays a lot she declined it and just settled for that cursed MLM.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Mykice...

Don't fall for it again! It's an endless marketing ploy, and your wife is prime for the picking of available suckers. (Sorry to be harsh, but true.)

These MLMs know JUST the personality type that will fall for "the next best thing"... sadly, your wife is in the bullseye.

Stop throwing good money after bad... you know where it gets you --> further in the hole. She will never sell the products. She will never "pay you back."
I tried that we only ended up arguing. The children were the one who suffers and she doesnt have any idea that what she's doing is destroying our family. I have some addiction as well like video games but i've learned to control it and just do it on my free time. I just dont know what\s with MLM that makes people like my wife go crazy
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Considering leaving my wife because of her obsession with networking

Hi all, im new here and I could surely use a good advice coming from all of you. I've been married for 5 years and sure married life has its ups and downs and sadly i am on the verge of dropping to the bottomless pit. you see my wife has this obsession about MLM (Multi Level Marketing)and i am not a big fan of this ****ing scam. my hard earned money went down the drain because my wife thinks we would get rich by doing the MLM. and she wants me to quit my job and support her instead. I want to support her but not on this endeavor. we always ended up arguing and she couldnt see what its doing to us. sadly there are times that i dont want to see her and i want to be left alone so that i could still have a bit of insanity. but today was really hard. She wants me to quit my job and give her my months paycheck so she can use it to invest and buy products. She's been doing this MLM crap for over 4 years and right now she havent gotten the results which those bastards from MLM promised that she would get if she would do the business. I am already at the brink of leaving her but i love my kids. should i wait and give her another chance maybe it would change her point of view? its destroying our relationship. Should i leave her because sometimes i think she's dragging me down. any advice would be appreciated. Thanks a lot:(
 

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Re: Considering leaving my wife because of her obsession with networking

yeah, that's basically a pyramid scheme that gets around the law by adding in a salable item

have you tried compiling evidence and showing her how the companies are all scams?

I'd try to get a hold of a lawyer asap to see what can be done to protect yourself financially
 

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Re: Considering leaving my wife because of her obsession with networking

I’m sure to draw fire and flack for this but the whole MLM thing, notwithstanding the issue of whether or not the particular program is a Ponzi scheme, really operates on the same underlying psychological principles as a religious cult. And I say that having worked for a number of years in the investigation and prosecution of white collar crimes.

People (some) just go in deep on these schemes and literally it’d take a cult de-programmer to pull them out.

Mind you I’m not just talking about the seemingly innocuous ones, that everyone has heard about which allegedly focus on the sales and marketing of soaps and household sundries, there are MLM “programs” out there in the hundreds of thousands covering everything from consumer goods to sophisticated equity and market “investing”. The people who run these tend to pick-up, pack-up and head to a new jurisdiction every couple of years – one or two steps ahead of the law if the law ever does take an interest in whats going on.

My suggestions . . . . keep your job, guard the family money (seriously) and contact your state’s Attorney General, Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, local police department and etc.
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Re: Considering leaving my wife because of her obsession with networking

yeah, that's basically a pyramid scheme that gets around the law by adding in a salable item

have you tried compiling evidence and showing her how the companies are all scams?

I'd try to get a hold of a lawyer asap to see what can be done to protect yourself financially
I explained to her to what happen with us back then. I was caught up with the promise of financial freedom that i quit my job and do the MLM business back then. and financially we hit rock bottom that we were evicted from our house. I told her about how bad MLM and how it affects our relationship but she wouldn't listen. my wife is definitely living in a world of make belief made by her friends who introduce MLM to her that the promise of financial freedom is within reach. Oh how i would love to strangle these people. I told her that doing this business wont pay our bills wont pay our debts(she actually made several loans since she squandered all our savings for the sake of MLM but still i remained and understand her)my wife is stubborn she's use to make decisions on her own. yeah she consult it to me but for the sake of telling me but she doesnt consider my opinion because she already made her decision..
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Re: Considering leaving my wife because of her obsession with networking

I’m sure to draw fire and flack for this but the whole MLM thing, notwithstanding the issue of whether or not the particular program is a Ponzi scheme, really operates on the same underlying psychological principles as a religious cult. And I say that having worked for a number of years in the investigation and prosecution of white collar crimes.

People (some) just go in deep on these schemes and literally it’d take a cult de-programmer to pull them out.

Mind you I’m not just talking about the seemingly innocuous ones, that everyone has heard about which allegedly focus on the sales and marketing of soaps and household sundries, there are MLM “programs” out there in the hundreds of thousands covering everything from consumer goods to sophisticated equity and market “investing”. The people who run these tend to pick-up, pack-up and head to a new jurisdiction every couple of years – one or two steps ahead of the law if the law ever does take an interest in whats going on.

My suggestions . . . . keep your job, guard the family money (seriously) and contact your state’s Attorney General, Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, local police department and etc.
how i wish we have these bureau just like what you have there( I assume youre living in the US) but here in the Philippines we laws about this but implementing it is a big problem, we dont have agencies that protects consumer welfare. that's what i am planning keeping my job. I understand the fact that doing this MLM thing would definitely put my family at risk, I just wished she realize that before its too late. I dont know how to stop her addiction towards this. I dont want to affect our marriage and leave her because of this but sometimes I thought about it. would it change her view about MLM?If not are there any other ways to get her mind off that MLM thing. I love my wife but with the rate she's going I dont know if love would suffice everything. Thanks for your reply it was really helpful
 

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Re: Considering leaving my wife because of her obsession with networking

I explained to her to what happen with us back then. I was caught up with the promise of financial freedom that i quit my job and do the MLM business back then. and financially we hit rock bottom that we were evicted from our house. I told her about how bad MLM and how it affects our relationship but she wouldn't listen. my wife is definitely living in a world of make belief made by her friends who introduce MLM to her that the promise of financial freedom is within reach. Oh how i would love to strangle these people. I told her that doing this business wont pay our bills wont pay our debts(she actually made several loans since she squandered all our savings for the sake of MLM but still i remained and understand her)my wife is stubborn she's use to make decisions on her own. yeah she consult it to me but for the sake of telling me but she doesnt consider my opinion because she already made her decision..
Sounds like you have tried everything and she won't listen to your opinion. You might have no choice but to leave.

Wonder if there is other family members that she looks up to that could speak with her. Like her father, mother, siblings, etc.

Do they know what is going on? If not, you should reach out to them for support.
 

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Re: Considering leaving my wife because of her obsession with networking

How about this. Say no and mean it this time. If she's dragging you down then your letting her do it.

Let her know that if she wants to run her life in a ditch then she should do it on her own but not yours or the kids and say it in a way she knows that your ready to pull the rug out from under her. She ran through her money and now wants yours and it you better make your mind up because your responsible for your kids lives too and since she isn't holding up her end, then it's up to you.

If she refuses then show her the door but just remember what good it will do your kids if both of you become irresponsible. You already lost your home, isn't that enough?
 

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Unless you want your kids sleeping under a bridge in the cold - STOP GIVING HER MONEY for that crap! Take her off the bank account or open a new one in only your name. Give her a pre paid card that you put money on for food or diapers...whatever your kid needs. That's it. End of story. If she wants to argue tell her to get out, get a job, and pay for her stupid investments herself.

That is insane that you keep giving her money for that!
 

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My father who was a board certified psychiatrist/neurologist with a MS in EE to boot got into Amway with my brother who was mentally ill.

Of course it does not work.

Crazy. It's an addiction, a gambling addiction to be precise.

Good news. You can lick this.

Tell your wife that you'll divorce her if she continues. Also she has to work
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
Unless you want your kids sleeping under a bridge in the cold - STOP GIVING HER MONEY for that crap! Take her off the bank account or open a new one in only your name. Give her a pre paid card that you put money on for food or diapers...whatever your kid needs. That's it. End of story. If she wants to argue tell her to get out, get a job, and pay for her stupid investments herself.

That is insane that you keep giving her money for that!
I told her that my friend from work offered her a job (part time) she would just work for 4 hours and she'll be paid roughly $400/month (home base) she declined it her reason was no one will take care of the kids and clean the house, cook dinner etc..As far as i know my 3 kids are going to school except for my youngest.i am the one who's cleaning the house during weekends and im the one who's cooking lunch and dinner the reason being is not that my wife is bad cook but i just dont like the way she cooks so i make it to a point that im the one who cooks our meal. So I dont understand why she declined the job and instead settled for MLM for me actually is the first sign of addiction to that MLM.
 

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Re: Re: Wife Obssessed with MLM

I told her that my friend from work offered her a job (part time) she would just work for 4 hours and she'll be paid roughly $400/month (home base) she declined it her reason was no one will take care of the kids and clean the house, cook dinner etc..As far as i know my 3 kids are going to school except for my youngest.i am the one who's cleaning the house during weekends and im the one who's cooking lunch and dinner the reason being is not that my wife is bad cook but i just dont like the way she cooks so i make it to a point that im the one who cooks our meal. So I dont understand why she declined the job and instead settled for MLM for me actually is the first sign of addiction to that MLM.
Because she's looking to get rich quick and doesn't really want to work hard to earn her money. Isn't that the premise of MLM's? Get in on the ground floor so soon you won't have to work and can just roll around in piles of money?

C
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
Re: Considering leaving my wife because of her obsession with networking

Sounds like you have tried everything and she won't listen to your opinion. You might have no choice but to leave.

Wonder if there is other family members that she looks up to that could speak with her. Like her father, mother, siblings, etc.

Do they know what is going on? If not, you should reach out to them for support.
Well my wife came from a dysfunctional family and her parents let her be adopted by her grandparent(which is a good thing) but her foster parents is very old already and have tons of problems and i just dont want them to get involved anymore. Her biological parents and her siblings? its not actually a good idea.
 
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