I have been happily married for 21 years. 2 months ago my wife and I decided to get a home refinance loan to update our house. We deposited a $48,000 check into our bank accounts. Shortly thereafter, I came home from work to find my 19-year-old daughter crying. She had found a romantic text on mom's phone that was not from me. I confronted my wife about this, and she admitted to being in an online relationship with a guy who had contacted her on Facebook messenger. I also discovered that he was supposedly a UN doctor stationed in Syria who had a son going to school in Nigeria. Long story short, I discovered that my wife had been wiring money, sending new Iphones, and Itunes gift cards to Nigeria. My wife finally gave me a picture of this man. After running a google facial recognition search, I discovered it was a stolen picture. I showed my wife the data proving that this man was a romance scammer. She started crying because she realized that the person that she was in love with was not real. I told her that I forgave her and that I thought we could work together to make our marriage better. I thought this was the end of her communicating with online romantic scammers.
Two weeks later, I was at work and I decided to check our bank accounts. I discovered that there was a $15,000 and a $5,000 withdraw from our bank accounts. I called my wife to ask her about this. She said that the $5,000 was donated to a church and a school in California and that she still had the $15,000. After I hung up the phone, I made an appointment with a lawyer. I told the lawyer my situation, and that I did not want to divorce my wife because I loved her and was worried about her. My wife had been going through a lot of stress related to her physical health and family issues. She had experienced an auditory hallucination and was seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist. I suspected that my wife was experiencing a delusional disorder or some kind of psychosis. My lawyer informed me that I should move all of the money to an account that my wife did not have access to. Before I could get it moved she withdrew $10,500 in cash. After looking through my wife's emails, I discovered that she sent $10,500 in cash via overnight FedEx to a person in Atlanta. I had the address and the name of the person. There have also been multiple 1000 dollar purchases at Walmart. I later discovered that these were Itunes gift cards. The entire $48,000 from our home refinance was gone. I then found out that my wife had withdrew $60,000 from her retirement account. She told me that she no longer loved me and that she was in love with someone else. She also accused me of cheating and physically abusing her. I have never done either of these things. I was devastated.
At this point, I filed for divorce. I also served my wife with a court order that prevented both her from spending any marital assets on things other than normal household upkeep. One day after I served her with this court order, she sent another $5,000 in cash to Atlanta via FedEx. I informed her that she could go to jail for violating the court order. She became mad and told me that she would tell the court that I had abused her and that I was being investigated for molesting my daughter.
This has been incredibly hard on me. I still love my wife so much and I think that she has delusional disorder. I have proven to her multiple times that the people she has been involved with are scammers. Multiple times she has broken down crying and told me that she was done with the scammers. However, days later she is again sending money. She also told me that the compassion and love that one of these guys has given her in three months is more that I gave her during our entire marriage. I have emailed her mental healthcare providers with all of this information. However, I feel like they are not listening.
We are currently in a 90-day waiting period for the divorce. I still hold out hope that we will reconcile. The other day I wrote my wife a love letter. I wrote that I would work on making her feel more special, that I forgave her, and that the money can be replaced. She said that some part of her still loved me and that she would be go to a therapist to work on our marriage. A couple of days later, I told her that I want nothing more to spend time with her and work on our marriage, but I needed her to break all ties with her online love interest. She informed me that she could not do this because she loves him. She informed me that he cares very much about her and that they talk everyday. I am heart broken. My wife is choosing a Nigerian romance scammer over me and I cannot do anything about it.
Two weeks later, I was at work and I decided to check our bank accounts. I discovered that there was a $15,000 and a $5,000 withdraw from our bank accounts. I called my wife to ask her about this. She said that the $5,000 was donated to a church and a school in California and that she still had the $15,000. After I hung up the phone, I made an appointment with a lawyer. I told the lawyer my situation, and that I did not want to divorce my wife because I loved her and was worried about her. My wife had been going through a lot of stress related to her physical health and family issues. She had experienced an auditory hallucination and was seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist. I suspected that my wife was experiencing a delusional disorder or some kind of psychosis. My lawyer informed me that I should move all of the money to an account that my wife did not have access to. Before I could get it moved she withdrew $10,500 in cash. After looking through my wife's emails, I discovered that she sent $10,500 in cash via overnight FedEx to a person in Atlanta. I had the address and the name of the person. There have also been multiple 1000 dollar purchases at Walmart. I later discovered that these were Itunes gift cards. The entire $48,000 from our home refinance was gone. I then found out that my wife had withdrew $60,000 from her retirement account. She told me that she no longer loved me and that she was in love with someone else. She also accused me of cheating and physically abusing her. I have never done either of these things. I was devastated.
At this point, I filed for divorce. I also served my wife with a court order that prevented both her from spending any marital assets on things other than normal household upkeep. One day after I served her with this court order, she sent another $5,000 in cash to Atlanta via FedEx. I informed her that she could go to jail for violating the court order. She became mad and told me that she would tell the court that I had abused her and that I was being investigated for molesting my daughter.
This has been incredibly hard on me. I still love my wife so much and I think that she has delusional disorder. I have proven to her multiple times that the people she has been involved with are scammers. Multiple times she has broken down crying and told me that she was done with the scammers. However, days later she is again sending money. She also told me that the compassion and love that one of these guys has given her in three months is more that I gave her during our entire marriage. I have emailed her mental healthcare providers with all of this information. However, I feel like they are not listening.
We are currently in a 90-day waiting period for the divorce. I still hold out hope that we will reconcile. The other day I wrote my wife a love letter. I wrote that I would work on making her feel more special, that I forgave her, and that the money can be replaced. She said that some part of her still loved me and that she would be go to a therapist to work on our marriage. A couple of days later, I told her that I want nothing more to spend time with her and work on our marriage, but I needed her to break all ties with her online love interest. She informed me that she could not do this because she loves him. She informed me that he cares very much about her and that they talk everyday. I am heart broken. My wife is choosing a Nigerian romance scammer over me and I cannot do anything about it.