Great advice. I'm trying not to just focus on the negatives. I need to tell her praise for all that she does. Which is a lot.
Dates haven't been all that frequent. Last one was not great as she was on her phone most of the time. (Did not like me bringing that up).
The fact that she says she is happy when I say I am not is tough to get by. I don't understand how she can be happy knowing I'm not.
Reading between the lines, it appears as if you think it is her responsibility to make you happy. I am sorry to burst your bubble but the only person who can make you happy is you. If something is making you miserable then confront it and deal with it. Being passive aggressive and stonewalling are sure fire ways to turn off your wife and for her to look for her bliss elsewhere. Stonewalling has got to be one of the worst things anyone can do, and is often a precursor to a failed marriage. You need to see your role in all of this.
You sound like a petulant child 'how can she be happy when I'm not happy....?" maybe she chooses to overlook your bull**** and fill her life with things that bring her joy, perhaps you could learn something from her. You sound far too intense. She could well be on TAM complaining about this husband who never wants to see her point of view but shuts her down, so she ends up raising her voice, but then he gives her the silent treatment......see where I am going with this? Get over yourself and deal with your issues like a mature adult.