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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
We are married for over 20 yrs and have 2 grown children. We had a happy and active sexual relationship. 3 years ago I had a medical negligence issue that rendered me 2 years in coma. I spent 6 months therapy to learn to learn to walk and talk again. Past 6 months had made good progress. We both have own careers and now I am on pension due to my condition.

Now, I found I am facing a new person. She is very active in gym at our condo (Mon-Fri) before heading off to work. I complimented her on her good body (lost 30 lbs from 3 years ago). I am hurt by her actions ....

1. She have new attire sense and she no longer wears our wedding band.

2. Initially, I noticed she was surprised I woke from my coma. But slowly beginning to be lovey-dovey with me when she found I have taken her off my will. She opened lawyer's letter to me regarding the will. Every now and then she asked if I have put her back in my will. I answered "Soon, dear."

3. She said she need to go clubbing with colleagues 3 times a week. (never go to clubs with me in our 20+ years of marriage.) I asked "Any gentlemen in your group?". She replied "Of course." but will not tell me before hand which club they are going. When I call, she will not answer the phone, claiming "Music too loud !".

4. I am suspicious of her and asked if she wanted a divorce ? She said "No."

5. One late evening she left her mobile in the living room, I took a peek at her chat with her divorcee sister. The sister is planning to take her on an European tour in spring to "spring free from your in-capable hubby". I was hurt and shocked ! She (wife) just told me this morning she will be going to England to visit her sister.

Am I imagining the worst of my wife due to my condition ?
 

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Surely you can see your wife is shopping for a new man?

I am sorry about what has happened, but even perfectly healthy people have had wives that turn out to be disloyal and unworthy of remaining in a marriage.

What you should do is file for divorce and try to cut your wife out of everything you possibly can financially, although it sounds like money is the only thing she wants from you.

Face reality and file for divorce. What your wife is doing is disrespectful, deceitful, and will eventually ruin you mentally.

Get out while you still can.
 

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She is having an affair. Plays out over an over on here. If you are real you should just give her her divorce papers now. Tell her you understand that she wants to be single but then she has to pay for it herself. Move on life is too short. Thank her for helping to raise your kids. Find someone younger and more loyal. This always gets worse and worse.
 

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Am I imagining the worst of my wife due to my condition ?
No, she is definitely up to no good. Most likely she is looking for your replacement or a lover on the side. I am sorry to say that it appears she never expected you to survive your coma and, your awakening from that state interrupted her plans. If I were you I would immediately cut off her access to your funds, except for day-to-day living expenses. Or, let her fund her plans with her own paycheck if she works.

Question:

When and why did you cut her out of your will?

Can you explain what you mean by medical negligence a bit more? Do you mean doctor/hospital error?
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Thanks for all the replies.

Here are answers to Red Sonja ...

1. I cut her off my will when I found she took the $500K settlement (from doctor/hospital to me) and banked into our joint account and then took it out and placed under FD in her name. This happened 4 months ago.

2. Doctor did an unauthorized surgery on me and complications caused me to fall into a coma for 2 years.
 

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What is your background?
What is the age difference between you and your wife.
What was your married life like before the coma?

I ask because based on the limited information you have shared it sounds like she is a gold digger who married an older man for his money.
 

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Did you get your money back from her ?
 
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Thanks for all the replies.

Here are answers to Red Sonja ...

1. I cut her off my will when I found she took the $500K settlement (from doctor/hospital to me) and banked into our joint account and then took it out and placed under FD in her name. This happened 4 months ago.

Who CARES if she is having an affair?

YOU cut her out of the "will"?

How does one do that with a community property state?

Why in the world are you still married to this person ?

You were in a coma, got a payout for negligence, she stole the payout and you are now fretting over whether or not she is having sex with someone other than you?

1) You are in a coma
2) you get a payout
3) she STEALS the payout
4) you cut her out of your will

Sounds like a solid relationship worthy of R.

Yikes.
 

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Thanks for all the replies.

Here are answers to Red Sonja ...

1. I cut her off my will when I found she took the $500K settlement (from doctor/hospital to me) and banked into our joint account and then took it out and placed under FD in her name. This happened 4 months ago.

2. Doctor did an unauthorized surgery on me and complications caused me to fall into a coma for 2 years.
I'm not sure where you live however this would be illegal anywhere in the USA. Have you spoken to a lawyer about forcing her to return the money and/or pressing charges?
 

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On a different forum, when you told your story, everyone advised you to get an attorney to help get your money back under your control. I think this was a few months ago. Have you taken any steps in that regard?
 

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