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Discussion Starter · #81 ·
Well I've been doing very well this is my second time around. But my first try at day trading a few years ago I messed it up by getting over exposed in a biopharma firm. I've read comments from some of my fellow traders it's considered part of the education. I have now earned more than I lost and have been consistently do well. Now I try not to get overexposed in any one stock. I have a system of using market change from established stocks. And yes it is a talent but there are plenty of us day traders that make decent bank. My account doesn't have that big of a base so as I compound each month I plan to retire in 5 years but you really shouldn't put your wife email on a forum
Glad you're making a great income. I guess it is possible but hard to believe. Uh, good point about the email. I wonder how to delete it.
 

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Discussion Starter · #83 ·
I do all the REAL cooking and the BANISHMENT!

So have you divorced her yet and when will you do this? Given you’re so proactive, know how things should be done, and are a take charge-I-know-it-all person.

Have you divorced her yet?
No. If i divorced her, she would not be here. If she gets a job, a real job, we'll see where it goes.
 

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Discussion Starter · #85 ·
I really think you should divorce. You don't treat her in a loving way.

I'm sure your wife is not dumb. If she used to make 6 figures I'm sure she can make money again. Maybe she needs to be on her own to make money again.

Talk to a lawyer and see what your options are.
I don't want to hurt the kids. If she'll get a job, we can at least stay together. Even 50K.
 

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I don't want to hurt the kids. If she'll get a job, we can at least stay together. Even 50K.
It's wrong staying for the kids when you don't love and respect your wife anymore. I'm sure your kids are wondering why mom sleeps in the basement. It will be sad for them to know she's there because she doesn't make at least 50k! Do you think kids care about college more than their parents marriage?

I don't make 50k and my husband is not kicking me to the shed. Maybe he knows I'd be divorcing him the moment he disrespects me.
 

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I think she should cut it off. She will more than likely get primary custody and very possibly the house until the children are adults and child support and possibly maintenance too.

She would have the added bonus of not being told she isn't doing anything correctly, she wouldn't be banished to the basement and her expenses probably wouldn't change that much from what she is covering now.

I'm sure you can go right out and find a suitable woman who would be really happy to do things "correctly" to avoid basement banishment.

I mean you are just hitting your prime and all.😉
 

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I think she should cut it off. She will more than likely get primary custody and very possibly the house until the children are adults and child support and possibly maintenance too.

She would have the added bonus of not being told she isn't doing anything correctly, she wouldn't be banished to the basement and her expenses probably wouldn't change that much from what she is covering now.

I'm sure you can go right out and find a suitable woman who would be really happy to do things "correctly" to avoid basement banishment.

I mean you are just hitting your prime and all.😉
Couldn’t have said it any better.
 

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Well, she birthed and nursed you two kids- how much is that worth? $1B each?

Try to be kind to her, brother, and try to be thankful for how well you're doing financially. Nitpicking is HARD on women. When you get that little itch to criticize- remind yourself what a tough/mean bastard you are and what a sweet dreamer she is, smile and mentally move on!
 

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Nitpicking?

He wants a life partner who is contributing financially--- earning money at a job--- since the kids are 10 and 12 and not little anymore, AND he does more than his fair share of household stuff and child activities.

I don't know why people are shaming that.

If the sexes were reversed, everyone would be saying what a loser the spouse was.

The women I know in real life would be ashamed to not be contributing. Ashamed.

pfffft just because you had two children (over a decade ago) does not give you a free pass to never work a full time job ever again.
 

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Discussion Starter · #92 ·
And that is not the system they set up when married. They aren't sharing. Parents don't owe kids a college education. That should be her choice if she wants to fund that. I'm not certain he knows her full financial picture but it is obvious he discounts everything she contributes, thinks she has to do things his way and that he treats her like a child or servant because he believes he has the RIGHT to banish her to the basement. I mean who does this?

They aren't partners nor have they ever been.

I agree they should divorce. I don't see him improving and we can't really know her situation as he has already changed his story once during this posting. He also hasn't answered some basic questions people have asked.

He's come for some atta boys and you're rights to bolster is ego or position.

He need not bother as with his behavior he will get what he wants a divorce unless she is a doormat.
Well, kids today need a college education to amount to anything. I don't feel it should all fall on my shoulders to put them through college but I will if that is what I need to do to help them in life. And no, I don't know her full financial picture but it is obvious she is losing money. And yes, she does contribute financially by paying bills out of her savings but that will not last. She also contributes some with housework, etc. She's in the basement to get her attention. After SIX years of day-trading I finally lost patience.

3rd paragraph you said "he has already changed his story once during this posting." I haven't. If I did, will you please point out what story I changed?
 

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Although I can see OP's point of view, he comes across as a jerk toward his wife. Marriage should be the union of two to become a team. In my household, although I've been traditionally (as a male) the breadwinner, whatever my wife has made is welcome, and I never had considered my earning mine, nor her earnings hers. It has always been the household money. Respect goes a long way.
 

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She's in the basement to get her attention
Seriously, just what the ever-lovin' hell? Was this after you hit her on the nose with a newspaper? Or, gave her a time-out with her nose in the corner?

What did you do to your ex-wife to punish her?

It looks like your current wife is finding the basement preferable to sleeping with you. Maybe, that's why she isn't pounding the pavement looking for a regular job. I think she's got her **** figured out.
 

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The women I know in real life would be ashamed to not be contributing. Ashamed.
This absolutely. If my wife can see me bust it and not feel she should be shouldering the burden alongside me, how much does she love and respect me? Does she really consider me her equal?
 

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Nitpicking?

He wants a life partner who is contributing financially--- earning money at a job--- since the kids are 10 and 12 and not little anymore, AND he does more than his fair share of household stuff and child activities.

I don't know why people are shaming that.

If the sexes were reversed, everyone would be saying what a loser the spouse was.

The women I know in real life would be ashamed to not be contributing. Ashamed.

pfffft just because you had two children (over a decade ago) does not give you a free pass to never work a full time job ever again.
Every family is different. Some agree that one should be the bread winner and the other be the homemaker. In other families one works full time and one part time. In others both work full time but some may have cleaners, childminders etc.
I certainly don't think there should be anyone who feels ashamed if they don't earn any or enough money. I don't know anyone who felt ashamed, especially if they were contributing a lot in other ways.
It's not all about money it's about all couples doing what suits each best.

My main concern here is the terrible attitude the Op has towards his wife who he clearly doesn't love or even like. I have to wonder why they are even together.
 

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This absolutely. If my wife can see me bust it and not feel she should be shouldering the burden alongside me, how much does she love and respect me? Does she really consider me her equal?
This woman is helping but she isn't doing it "correctly" so she gets basement banishment.

I think it's important to note that, by OP's own admission, his wife contributes quite well. Probably more financially than the average wife.

It just isn't being done the way he wants it done.
 

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This woman is helping but she isn't doing it "correctly" so she gets basement banishment.

I think it's important to note that, by OP's own admission, his wife contributes quite well. Probably more financially than the average wife.

It just isn't being done the way he wants it done.
I didn't get the feeling she contributes quite well. I don't recall the details 100%, but it sounds like a small % of their total expenses. Groceries and some insurance?
 

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If you don't count my mortgage. Groceries, utilites, and insurance make up 50% of my monthly expenses. Actually more.

But the real trouble is they don't sit down and do any calculations. So she thinks she doing her share. He thinks she isn't.
 

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I didn't get the feeling she contributes quite well. I don't recall the details 100%, but it sounds like a small % of their total expenses. Groceries and some insurance?
She pays all utilities, food and when they eat out.

He pays the taxes and insurance.

He wants her to pay half.

I just pointed out that she does more financially than the average wife. I'm pretty confident she is above the average wife with financial contributions. She just doesn't do things "correctly" to avoid banishment to teach her otherwise.

It is misleading for anyone to make statements that she should be ashamed for not contributing anything when she does quite a lot including breakfast and lunch while he usually takes care of dinner. I actually do 99% of the cooking in our household and my youngest son does all the cooking on his days off and still fixes dinner occasionally on days he's not.

His fiance works as well but goes to school and he holds the lion's share of the financial burden on his shoulders.
 
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