Talk About Marriage banner

Status
Not open for further replies.
1 - 17 of 17 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
4 Posts
Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
Hello. My wife and I have been married for 4 years and we have been together for 8 years in total. She was my first and when I first had sex with her i asked her if I was the biggest penis shes ever had and she started laughing. After that we kept having sex, but we keptWithin a year, we were sharing dildos together and after a while I enjoyed anal more than she did. We started doing things like pegging and using double sided dildos together which I had always considered more of a gay/lesbian thing, but we both enjoyed it. Anyways, a few years into our marriage she asked me to try on her panties and lingerie. After that she was all over me and got really excited so the sex was amazing. The next week she surprised me with matching lingerie for the both of us. She taught me how to shave my body hair, including a landing strip to match hers. Now, we pretty much dress up together every time we have sex. Our sex life btw has turned into having a lot more outercourse and a lot less intercourse. I usually just rub my penis against her clit and we grind against each other until we both orgasm. I admit that all of this has been fun, but I wonder why she likes it so much? She has said that she would like to have a threesome with another woman, but she said it would hot if I dressed up like a woman for it too. I wonder if she might be a total lesbian?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,325 Posts
My advice can be taken with a grain of salt as I have never been down any of those roads with my wife.

I think your hanging on to a bit of too much "penis focus". Your gonna fall down the dark rabbit hole if you keep that up.

10" dildo ..... this is back to your penis insecurities. I don't look like The Rock .... but I don't worry about it....know what I mean?

Less of a man? Are you a man around the house in general? Yard work..tools..take care of the man stuff ?

I'll say that if she gets a wiff of your penis issues it won't help...not one bit.....don't do that.

The real question is: Does any of this bedroom stuff carry over to problems in your domestic life? If yes then maybe ya'll have some stuff to figure out together.
If no .... then maybe you guys are just into that stuff and she wants to take it to the next level.

Maybe you can just take the easy route and tell her your not much into taking up the feminine roll and discuss that with her.
 

·
Super Moderator
Joined
·
5,452 Posts
I admit that all of this has been fun, but I wonder why she likes it so much? She has said that she would like to have a threesome with another woman, but she said it would hot if I dressed up like a woman for it too. I wonder if she might be a total lesbian? I also wonder if doing things like dressing up with her and pegging have made her see me as less of a man? Has anyone else ever had a similar experience or do any other women find that kinda stuff arousing to do with their man? I admit it makes us feel really close and sexual, but I just never imagined I would ever have a sex life like the one I do. Also, I was NEVER into cross dressing or being so submissive before trying all this stuff with my wife.
You say the sex is great, the sex brings you closer, and you're enjoying yourselves immensely so why do you care the whys? Just enjoy it.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
15 Posts
PLEASE forgive me if I am wrong or if my reply comes across as rude. But I have a fair amount of experience in this particular area, and your story comes across as more of a fantasy than reality. Sometimes mates who have this particular fetish will join groups and post the reality they *wish* they had, because just the dialogue back and forth with others feeds the fantasy.

Again, please forgive me if I am entirely wrong. I have a husband who is into this, and as a result I have searched the internet high and low, sought counseling, etc. in hopes of understanding and dealing with it. I have learned it is very difficult to find actual useful information because of the number of fantasy posts out there. :)
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,939 Posts
PLEASE forgive me if I am wrong or if my reply comes across as rude. But I have a fair amount of experience in this particular area, and your story comes across as more of a fantasy than reality. Sometimes mates who have this particular fetish will join groups and post the reality they *wish* they had, because just the dialogue back and forth with others feeds the fantasy.

Again, please forgive me if I am entirely wrong. I have a husband who is into this, and as a result I have searched the internet high and low, sought counseling, etc. in hopes of understanding and dealing with it. I have learned it is very difficult to find actual useful information because of the number of fantasy posts out there. :)
I was thinking much the same myself.

Most people in this world have some self-hatred towards bits of themselves, their identity, and have some self-destructive tendencies. Having it come out sexually is, often, rather healthy.

The OP posts as a man who is uncomfortable with his masculinity, but rather than indulging in transvestitism or humiliating himself, instead takes those urges out of his agency and plays the passive role. There is part of him that hates his masculinity, and this indluges it. On the other hand, the OP does not want to identify with it.

Chill, I suggest. Most people in the world are very strange.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,229 Posts
Hello. My wife and I have been married for 8 years and we have been together for 12 years in total. She was my first and when I first had sex with her i asked her if I was the biggest penis shes ever had and she started laughing. After that we kept having sex, but we kept adding more kink. Within a year, we were sharing dildos together and after a while I enjoyed anal more than she did. We started doing things like pegging and using double sided dildos together which I had always considered more of a gay/lesbian thing, but we both enjoyed it. Anyways, a few years into our marriage she asked me to try on her panties and lingerie. I got really hard when I put on her really skimpy panties and she laughed and said that most guys erect ****s wouldn't fit in panties. After that she was all over me and got really excited so the sex was amazing. The next week she surprised me with matching lingerie for the both of us and soon after that we started buying matching high heels. We also bought a few wigs and she taught me how to shave my body hair, including a landing strip to match hers. Now, we pretty much dress up together every time we have sex. Our sex life btw has turned into having a lot more outercourse and a lot less intercourse. I usually just rub my penis against her clit and we grind against each other until we both orgasm. She also bought us a male sex doll with a 10 inch dildo to 'improve our sex life' since I am not very well endowed. I admit that all of this has been fun, but I wonder why she likes it so much? She has said that she would like to have a threesome with another woman, but she said it would hot if I dressed up like a woman for it too. I wonder if she might be a total lesbian? I also wonder if doing things like dressing up with her and pegging have made her see me as less of a man? Has anyone else ever had a similar experience or do any other women find that kinda stuff arousing to do with their man? I admit it makes us feel really close and sexual, but I just never imagined I would ever have a sex life like the one I do. Also, I was NEVER into cross dressing or being so submissive before trying all this stuff with my wife.
This will haunt you for the rest of your life.
If Spring Break is actually over.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,039 Posts
I saw the title and instantly identified with it. However not with the OP's details. I've been married 46+ years and my wife drives me nuts by dressing me up and by making sure she is there with me when I need to buy clothes.

However, my wife's issue is that she views me as her "arm candy." That is when we go out, she feels that I need to look good so that other's feel she has an attractive man at her side as it gives her more status and admiration from others. It kind of drives me nuts, to be told, no that jacket doesn't go with that shirt, or you need a different belt with those pants, or change the color of your shoes before we go out to dinner or a party.

So that is my issue with my wife dressing me up so much. Basically she feels that I am the ultimate fashion accessory to improve how she looks in public.

Perhaps the OP has a similar but different problem. Perhaps his "wife" feels she looks better when a cross-dressed man is next to her. If so make sure you don't look too pretty.

My advice is to either figure out what your boundaries are and explain them carefully to her.......or spend some couples time with a marriage counselor.

Good luck.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
910 Posts
i do not necessarily see a problem. She is trying kinkier things, and experimenting with you. So at least the two of you are sharing.

Where it would get a little more dangerous is if she brought another man home, while you are cross dressed, and started having sex with him instead of you.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
8,814 Posts
I saw the title and instantly identified with it. However not with the OP's details. I've been married 46+ years and my wife drives me nuts by dressing me up and by making sure she is there with me when I need to buy clothes.

However, my wife's issue is that she views me as her "arm candy." That is when we go out, she feels that I need to look good so that other's feel she has an attractive man at her side as it gives her more status and admiration from others. It kind of drives me nuts, to be told, no that jacket doesn't go with that shirt, or you need a different belt with those pants, or change the color of your shoes before we go out to dinner or a party.

So that is my issue with my wife dressing me up so much. Basically she feels that I am the ultimate fashion accessory to improve how she looks in public.

Perhaps the OP has a similar but different problem. Perhaps his "wife" feels she looks better when a cross-dressed man is next to her. If so make sure you don't look too pretty.

My advice is to either figure out what your boundaries are and explain them carefully to her.......or spend some couples time with a marriage counselor.

Good luck.
Has your wife told you she views you as arm candy? An alternative reason may be that in the old days (your generation and mine) women felt they had a responsibility to make sure their man looked good because if he didn't it reflected poorly on the wife. You've never heard people comment "How could his wife let him out of the house looking like that?". Or,
"That poor guy. His wife obviously doesn't care about him".
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,891 Posts
i suspect that she is slowly turning you into a cuckold husband....she is slowly emasculating you to the point that she will be having sex with men and you will have to watch and clean up after....
 
1 - 17 of 17 Posts
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top