How does anyone ever know if their H/W is truly sorry?Watching and helping him get the answers might help you to come to terms with it and gain some basis of assurance that it won't happen again. If - and only if - your husband is genuinely remorseful.
I get what you're saying, but surely it is WH that needs the lessons in remorse, not me.No you shouldn't - and the thing is if he wants to cheat again eventually he will. The fact that he's trying to figure out why is a good sign.
Read around here, you can find lots about what remorse looks like. It's taking ownership, it's being willing to be held accountable, it's complete and voluntary transparency, it's doing anything and everything you need, it's doing whatever is necessary to never do it again.
Being sorry is different than remorse. Sorry is wishing you could make it go away or take it back. Remorse is accepting that you can't undo it and resolving to yourself to do everything in your power to repair the damage you've caused and never ever do it again.
Ditto.I can't get away from the 'you're sorry because I know about it' and I was never meant to find out. So it would have continued on know doubt, and still may do if the opportunity is there.
But i bloody well shouldn't have to be with him to stop him screwing another woman!
blah blah blahThe failure is definitley his, I know I'm there right now with perfect wife and family who I want to rebuild. It will be a hard slog but I'm prepared to do anything to repair the damage, I love my wife and family and none of it has Ben an act, the only act was trying to cover it up. Stay strong he will get there
Incidentally my wife did counsel me after I had a breakdown after I revealed my (revenge) affair to her. She has a PhD in psychology, and is a trained counsellor.I truly hope so. I cant bear anything more.....it would surely kill me off.
I can only do what I am able to, if it isn't enough, then it isn't enough and I will wrap it up quick!