Where do you start??? My husband is self-centered, self-absorbed and unlikely to change. We have been together and married almost 25 years. Where we arein life he believes it is because all he does, forgetting that I had anything to do with it. When ever I have a great job he wants me to be a stay at home mom, when I am a stay at home mom he insists that I work for health insurance. I have accommodated him many times with each. However when I am a stay at home mom he does not give me any money to do anything but grocery shop. When I work he never feels like I pay enough of the bills. We do not have any financial problems we both make good, maybe even very good money. To date he pays for the house bills, mortgage, electric, gas, garbage, and I pay for the groceries, health insurance and all of our children’s needs (twin 16 years old are expensive) he does not purchase anything for me because he feels he is doing so much already, when we fight he always states that he pays all the bills, each time I need to remind him I pay my share. He has a newer rig 06, and when I wanted a newer rig(mine 94) he was sure we did not need any additional bills then he went and purchased a new truck 08, then a new dirt bike 08, and then more this and that for himself. He was not like this when we met or while we dated it started after we were married. He will not take a vacation with me and the kids (they are very well mannered and great kids, very mature) he only takes time away from work to vacation with his friends hunting, fishing, bike riding, 4x4ing. Then explains that these are guy things, perhaps however these are things I did when I met him, dated him and it was no were in the marriage papers that I would have to stop doing what I love when I got married. He will not engage in this conversation, he explains that he loves me and wants to be with. I make vacation plans and he sabotages them so that we cannot go. Last year I had the hotel reservations, travel plans and everything put together, he had agreed to go with me and at the last minute he changed his plans and went with friends to do something else. He talked to me as if I would be staying at home and canceling the reservation. No I went alone and had a great time, granted, it would have been better with company however he made sure all our friends knew he wanted it to be just the two of us. I have tried to talk to him about our relationship being in the toilet and he agrees and then gets angry, however he has still filled his time with other people. We were 4x4ing together and my run was better then his consecutively he took the truck away from me. He now has another person drive that truck, it is not our truck it is his truck and he make sure I know this. I do not know what a man means when he says “I love you and want to be with you” and his actions are to do nothing with me????? Please help me to understand or should I give it up and leave? I have been a good wife, not a great wife, I do my very best, our house is the house where the kids hang out (downstairs family room)My house is not always perfect, I have dogs, I do not always cook dinner, like I said I am not perfect on the other hand most people like me and enjoy coming over to our house for dinner parties, BBQ’s and game night. I am not over weight, I do take care of myself, however I do love my sweat pants in the winter. He is not running around on me, he is not cheating on me his friends would tell me. They tell me more then I care to know. But I do listen and smile….. Other men friends tell me that they want to meet a woman like me, then why does my husband keep his distance?