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hey everyone, I am new to forums, i write cause i feel really down on my marriage. i have been only married for 7 months now, not much time to base the status of a good marriage but I remember when i could not even stop thinking about my wife. I know thats the love stage, and now i feel i don't love her anymore. to be honest i am not doing much to help but i think its because i don't want to be with her anymore. my wife is not really the most sharpest tool in the shed, and i knew that, actually i kind of liked teaching her things that were just so comon sense, and thats another thing, comon sense just doesn't register with her.
I don't want to bash on my wife but I am not exaggerating. I think my biggest fault i have is that i care too much for her that i hate to see her sad, and we have gone at it with divorce and seperation rants before, usually they end up being squashed with i am sorry and i will never do it again. but i think i need to ignore the fact that i know she will make me sad for leaving but i have to know that staying is killing me inside.
i have known my wife for almost a good 2 and a half years, thats including our marriage, i sometimes wonder if we married to soon. there are many factors that come into play with our relationship, our work, our lives at that time, stress, and maybe i think to myself that the only reason i did enjoy her so much was because evrything around me was so wrong that she was only thing that made me happy. I just turn 28, and i want to refuse the fact that this is it. I deserve to be happy even if i made a mistake, am i right?
Has anyone ever been or is in my position right now?
 

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Hi there,

I'm in the opposite position to you. After 7 months of living together (5 years together all up) my (ex) boyfriend has told me he just doesn't love me anymore. It's nothing that I have done wrong etc, the love just died so he says. for the past 5 years we were happier than we had every been (especially him as he is a 'depressive' sort of person) but now he's ended it saying that I deserve to be trully loved. (check out my other posts for background)
All I can suggest is that you give it your best shot. One therapist that I went to had a different spin on it all, mainly that men have trouble moving into the 'companionship' phase of love - women do it easily - and with this phase can come the horrible feeling of 'nothing' because the passion etc has slowed down (ie honeymoon period is over). We still had the passion but I think the general bits of life had got in the way.
He never wanted to hurt me - was crying when he told me - but for him it is just what it is... We are going to attempt to be 'friends' but I'm so emotionally attached it's not right for me atm.

All I can say is if you still care for her then I think you owe the last 2 and a half years at least a month of trying. The one thing that I think destroyed my relationship is that he fought the idea in his head for two months before telling me. Perhaps if he had told me at the start then we could have saved it by working though it together, with a therapist etc instead of him just dropping the bomb that he'd actually been feeling this way for such a long time....
 
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