This may be long....
I have been married 6 years (we are an older couple). A couple of years ago, while I was traveling he called me to say he had a friend (female) of a friend (female) in Canada that was in jail due to domestic abuse and both husband/wife were put in jail. This friend “W” lives out of the country and called my husband to see if he could help “S” out as she had nobody up there. Needless to say he got in his car and drove and sorted things out as much as he could considering he wasn’t family. He came back and then he became involved in the situation and was brought into the case due to seeing her physical wounds, damaged to the house, etc. No problem. However, since then and over the years he has been either flying or driving to Canada—telling me he is helping her fix up the house the ex damaged, going to court with her (still ongoing), helping her move to an apartment, helping her move again to another part of Canada. Going to China to meet her family. Then last year he was blaming me as he had issues with the custom border patrol and they took away his nexus speed pass. He told me that they told him they had a record of someone calling them telling them when you’re coming, what car you drive, etc. For the life of me I have no idea why they would be stopping and questioning him as I for one wouldn’t have called. Of course to this day he has yet to tell me what exactly happened as every time I ask he tells me he doesn’t want to get into it.
Long story short, he tells me he isn’t having an affair and that she is just a good friend. She calls numerous times a day and from the side of the conversation I hear it’s all innocent. He has told me if he was being unfaithful he wouldn’t be sleeping with me. I don’t understand why he feels the need to call her and vice versa so many times. He calls her in the morning while she drives to work, calls her when she drives home, asks her what she’s cooking for dinner, etc. The kicker is when I ask a question he gives me the minimal response and from what I can tell when she may ask the same question, he elaborates so much more in the response.
Also, a couple of times I had come home from work and she had her webcam on at work and when I asked why she would have the webcam on her while she’s working and you say you don’t know as you don’t have your webcam on and you say you totally forgot about it. I say it’s so freaky and you would then minimize the screen. btw he doesn't work.
I admit I am not the greatest communicator but I am at wits end as to what to do. To me, he may not be in a physical affair but it certainly seems like it’s an emotional affair. I brought that up and he laughed and made me feel like I was the “stupid” one for even thinking that.
The kicker is I haven’t met her and when I say I would like to meet her, his response is, I have my friends and you have yours.
Not sure what else I can do and would appreciate any input men/ladies take on the above. Am I just being delusional?
Sorry for the rambling.
Thanks
I have been married 6 years (we are an older couple). A couple of years ago, while I was traveling he called me to say he had a friend (female) of a friend (female) in Canada that was in jail due to domestic abuse and both husband/wife were put in jail. This friend “W” lives out of the country and called my husband to see if he could help “S” out as she had nobody up there. Needless to say he got in his car and drove and sorted things out as much as he could considering he wasn’t family. He came back and then he became involved in the situation and was brought into the case due to seeing her physical wounds, damaged to the house, etc. No problem. However, since then and over the years he has been either flying or driving to Canada—telling me he is helping her fix up the house the ex damaged, going to court with her (still ongoing), helping her move to an apartment, helping her move again to another part of Canada. Going to China to meet her family. Then last year he was blaming me as he had issues with the custom border patrol and they took away his nexus speed pass. He told me that they told him they had a record of someone calling them telling them when you’re coming, what car you drive, etc. For the life of me I have no idea why they would be stopping and questioning him as I for one wouldn’t have called. Of course to this day he has yet to tell me what exactly happened as every time I ask he tells me he doesn’t want to get into it.
Long story short, he tells me he isn’t having an affair and that she is just a good friend. She calls numerous times a day and from the side of the conversation I hear it’s all innocent. He has told me if he was being unfaithful he wouldn’t be sleeping with me. I don’t understand why he feels the need to call her and vice versa so many times. He calls her in the morning while she drives to work, calls her when she drives home, asks her what she’s cooking for dinner, etc. The kicker is when I ask a question he gives me the minimal response and from what I can tell when she may ask the same question, he elaborates so much more in the response.
Also, a couple of times I had come home from work and she had her webcam on at work and when I asked why she would have the webcam on her while she’s working and you say you don’t know as you don’t have your webcam on and you say you totally forgot about it. I say it’s so freaky and you would then minimize the screen. btw he doesn't work.
I admit I am not the greatest communicator but I am at wits end as to what to do. To me, he may not be in a physical affair but it certainly seems like it’s an emotional affair. I brought that up and he laughed and made me feel like I was the “stupid” one for even thinking that.
The kicker is I haven’t met her and when I say I would like to meet her, his response is, I have my friends and you have yours.
Not sure what else I can do and would appreciate any input men/ladies take on the above. Am I just being delusional?
Sorry for the rambling.
Thanks
