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I went through almost the exact same thing you are almost a year ago. My wife didn't give me the ILYBNILWY speech but I did get the "I'm not happy" and "Idon't know what I want" speech.

I then proceeded to make every mistake in the book. I cried, begged pleaded and tried to talk her way back to me. I became insecure, clingy etc...

I then investigated to make sure there was no one else which there wasn't.

At that point I simply manned up and no mater how I felt inside, I didn't show it. No more crying, begging etc. I stopped trying to talk about the relationship and just acted like what she said to me didn't matter. But I also listened to the things she said that bothered her and I made an honest assesment of myself to see if she was right. Ofcourse she was in many ways so I started to slowly change those things as to not advertise what I was doing.

At the same time I honestly assesed my wife and I now see her more as she is and not the "princess on a pedistal" I made her out to be. Once you do that, you'll realize she is lucky to have you, not the other way around.

I also decided I would never let her hurt me that way again so I made a calculated effort to detach a bit, quite a bit. The thought of losing her is no where as scary as it once was. When you get to that point they sense it and the attitude changes.
 
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