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Hello all...new to the board. Felt a need to post and get opinions.

I am in my early forties, as is my wife. We have a child who is a preteen.

I honestly don't know what happened...where it went wrong. I look back over our marriage and can't find any one place where it happened, but somewhere in our 16 years of marriage (together for 20), I stopped loving her.

I know she loves me, but I find myself getting impatient and angry with her (though I bite my tongue) a lot. I look at her and feel nothing. I think she's a great mom and a good wife, but I find myself wishing that she would have an affair so I would have an excuse to divorce her. I stay at work very late so I don't have to spend much time with her and when I come home, my entire body tenses up and I get a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. I no longer look forward to weekends or time off because I have absolutely ZERO time to myself. She monopolizes all of my time.

I made a list recently of all of the reasons I should stay. I only came up with one...our child. How sad is that?

I seriously have no emotions for her. When I tell her I love her, I feel like a disgusting liar.

But at the same time, I respect her and DO care about her feelings. I don't want to hurt her.

So what do I do?
 

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It would be helpful if you could talk more about why you think you fell out of love. Is she not meeting your needs? Is she not enjoying a frequent enough sex life with you? Has she become boring and predictable? Has her appearance drastically changed? What are some of the things you two have in common, other than home and child?

Also, how much time do you two spend together, actually together? How often do you two go out together? How often do you two get away together, no kids? When was the last time she surprised you and you her with something special?

I don't think we FALL out of love, I think we neglect it do death. What are your thoughts?
 
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