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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Ok so i know im a little young to be married but me and my wife have been married for about 5 months. We met in the 2nd grade so its not like i dont know her at all. Anywhos to get the situation, every time she is on her period she completely changes to a violent person. Im a very calm person so i deal with things calmly. She is on her period at the moment and last night we got into an argument over a very stupid situation. Really she was the only one talking while i was just quiet. Well she got really pissed at something that i said and threw my $800 Toshiba laptop at the wall, then had the nerve to throw my $1400 iMac "20 Apple computer off the desk onto the ground. AHHH! she hasnt paid for NOTHING!! i do not believe she should have went this far so i put some clothes on and left and shes all wondering if ima divorce her. So my question is: since this has been happening every month and is not improving...what would you suggest i do. Keep in mind that my computer is part of my income and i worked hard just to afford it. I am no where near rich. I pay for everything and she only works part-time 3 days a week for like 5-6 hours. We have no kids. PLEASE HELP!!

-finalcut
 

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Wow, it sounds like things really got heated there last night.

I know that hormones can really wreak havoc on a woman's personality and ability to control her feelings. And I know that there is medication (usually a form of hormone therapy, like bc pills) that can help. I would recommend waiting a day or so for her to calm down and not be so volatile, and then sit down with her and tell her that you're concerned about her outbursts and that you've noticed they coincide with her periods. Let her know that you understand that she might not be able to control herself as much as she'd like when the hormones get going. I say this because it will be easier to take (I think) if you recognize that it's not entirely under her control. Then ask her to see her doctor and see if she can get some medication to help the problem. I suspect that will help a lot. A friend of mine had a similar problem, got the right dosage of the right kind of bc, and she's like a new person. She recognizes the difference now that she's on them too.

Just my two cents.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Thanks for your input. She is on Birth Control at the moment but during her period she doesnt have to take any BC. I thought maybe since she isnt taking the BC during her period its like a withdrawal effect.

Thanks Again.
 

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she definitely needs some counseling. have you asked her about going?
 

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Sounds like she has violent times, and the question is why would you want to bring children into the world with someone like that for a mother that might hurt the child every 3-5 days a month.

If you stay with her insist she gets anger management.

draconis
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Exactly. She wants kids but i feel im too young at the moment and would like to mature a little more. Thanks All for your input!
 

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Yup, no kids yet. You def need to get this under control first. Has it always been this way? I suffer from a similar problem, only I'm not violent, but during PMS my family KNOWS to stay far away from me. Last month I was so moody and couldn't control myself that I scared myself. I was talking to a male friend of the family about it and he said that it's a good thing that I can recognize it... that his woman thinks the whole problem is him and nothing's wrong with her. Sure, I do know I get a major attitude each month, so I got some mood altering VITAMINS. Drugs and hormone replacement scare me, I wanted to go as natural as I could, as drugs and hormones have side effects. So far I've been calmed. I'm taking St. John's Wort once/day and B-6. I can actually feel the angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other, both trying to persuade me, and the angel always wins. But I've got PMS week coming up this week, so we'll see how good the vitamins do. Maybe I'll up the SJW to 2x/day.

But I think for your case the first hurdle you need to jump is somehow (GENTLY) getting her to acknowledge she has a problem. Counseling isn't going to do anything, it's hormonal and you need to deal from the inside out, it's not in her head and not something she can really control with her thoughts. Do some research on PMS vitamins or mood enhancing vitamins or visit a natural foods store to get some advice from them. :)
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Thanks Bhappy3 for your input. she acknowledges that she has a problem but she doesnt seem to care about controlling it. I mean i was actually kool with it at first but she crossed the line by throwing my computer on the ground. Im not sure what kind of damage has been done but this really got to me badly. I will definitely see about pills to decrease this hormone effect. I know the period can be a tough time for a woman so i tend to be more tolerant with things but i believe this was too far. Its been like this from day one but i care about her enough to deal with it.

Thanks again.
 

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Your wife needs to talk to her doctor about this problem. Start by switching to a different birth control pill. There are many different hormone combinations available among the birth control pills. I also recommend that she see an endocrinoloist--they are experts at solving hormonal issues. That's who finally solved my hormonal imbalance years ago.

And there is something else to consider. There must be something bothering your wife. Whatever is bothering her is magnified during her period. She is unable to keep it bottled up during this time due to hormones. I suggest some counseling before this anger gets expressed ALL month long. Perhaps a little problem could be solved before it gets to be a big problem.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Well when she is not on her period i can honestly say she is very fun to be around which is why i married her. She is very verbal when it comes to thing that bother her so im pretty sure she would tell me. Someone else suggested that she try a different BC pill so i might try that instead. Thanks for your suggestion 827Aug.
 
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