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Discussion Starter #1
Rory whatever her name is says she can tell me for $500. I thought I would just ask here, and see what you guys think.
I'm 45, and stepping into that murky and scary dating pool. I want it all: real love and good sex. The latter seems to be in high demand. But that's no good to me without the former. So chime in. Maybe I should add: what makes you NOT love a woman?
Thanks for your thoughts.
 

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Discussion Starter #5
I am like "sexual Napalm" right now, but trying hard not to run away a good man by being too free, too early. Clearly, I have not learned all I need to know on the subject, and my voodoo has serious limits. Why does this have to be so hard?

Ok, so I grew up taught that you don't do certain things on a first date. Or go to a hotel. So am I still right in thinking that these are red flags, or has all that been thrown out the window?

My self respect is all I have. If a man can't wait a week or so? Wtf? And yet it is as hard on me as it is on them to wait. Hangups or morals? I'm not sure at this point.
 

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At your age I would imagine compatibility to be the thing to focus on. You’re in the second half of your life, a time when many men start thinking on which direction to take their life, retirement and the run up to their end game. Maybe a change in career, new adventures that type of thing.

So a woman who is compatible with your values and beliefs, your interests and dreams, visions and plans for the future would I imagine be attractive to you.

From a physical perspective you’ll probably attract a woman the same “score” as yourself. For example if you’re an 8 you’ll be attracted to a 7 or an 8.

Best thing to do is make your life plans and look for a partner who’ll be with you along the way.



Always keep in mind it’s the woman who chooses the man. So set your stall at in a very authentic way, be clear who you are and where you are going and for sure if a woman likes what she sees she will be with you.
Just swap woman for man etc. Except for the last paragraph of course.
 

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So, did her personality and morals change, or did your tastes in them change?
I think her true personality and morals were never revealed to me.

She may still have a great personality, just not toward me.

I never thought she would cheat. Two things she promised before marriage and I told her they were a deal breaker.

Infidelity, Lies

I found both.
 

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I'm so sorry, 2. I had the same thing happen with my ex. Never thought in a million years he would do those 2. It's devastating.

Hope you can move on eventually.
 

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What attracts me to a womans personality is how she acts. No man wants to think his girl is too easy, or will freak out over nothing. So just be cool and understanding and things should work out well for you.
 

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Ha, SA, you know very well !! ;)
skype said: Sarcasm.
To be honest, I don't get Joking all that well on forums, I misinterpret all kinds of things, can't even get the abbreviations half the time....it's down right embarrassing...:eek:

My husband, sweet & sensitive as the man is.. has always been attracted to ROUGH edgy feisty type women (so long as they also have a sensitive side too ... or it would all fall to the ground)...

What does he love.. a woman who loves him back, appreciates him , respects him ...where he can FEEL his presence in my life brings ME happiness.... in this way, I want to give back.... It would crush him if he couldn't fulfill me in these ways...

begats .....
 

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Personally the way you said you want it all and what is the kind of unrealistic and self thinking in 40's women now that makes me run like hell. Really common now you know as if they're all super models or something, they all seem to think they're still 25. But check out the date sites , far from it. You'd think 5 or 1o yrs alone and still on them should be a reality check but it doesn't seem to be.

l love and admire a good person, special, realistic with her feet on the ground, so if there's gonna be anyone new l'm really worried about finding it these days tbh.
They all seem so fkd up so far and away on planet me me la la , tell you , l've really lost the faith :scratchhead:
 

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To be honest, I don't get Joking all that well on forums, I misinterpret all kinds of things, can't even get the abbreviations half the time....it's down right embarrassing...:eek:

My husband, sweet & sensitive as the man is.. has always been attracted to ROUGH edgy feisty type women (so long as they also have a sensitive side too ... or it would all fall to the ground)...

What does he love.. a woman who loves him back, appreciates him , respects him ...where he can FEEL his presence in my life brings ME happiness.... in this way, I want to give back.... It would crush him if he couldn't fulfill me in these ways...

begats .....
SA: In a nutshell, I really think that I'm a whole lot like Mr. SA, and having read your above assessment, you are pretty well "spot-on!" Mr. SA, in my estimation, is simply one lucky guy; and you conversely are one lucky gal!

That being said, what really attracts me to a woman is: (1) her respect for her body, as well as her mind, (2) Her wit and charm, (3) Her playfulness, naughtiness, and sense of humor, (4) Her empathy for others, more especially children, (5) Cleanliness and pride about her domicile, (6) Being educated and well read, not necessarily college degreed, but having a marked sense of intelligence about her, and finally (7) An overt spirituality as well a deep-seeded reverence and love for God! And to know that, it's never really all that apparent by just the mere number of times that she comes to enter the church narthex per se, but basically by how she projects God's love to the world while she's away from the church!

And Dear Lord, I can only hope that I would do the same for her!

But isn't it rather strange how any or all of these characteristics can slowly, or even rapidly change, over the course of a given relationship! And to that question, all I can really ask is "Why?"
 

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SA: In a nutshell, I really think that I'm a whole lot like Mr. SA, and having read your above assessment, you are pretty well "spot-on!" Mr. SA, in my estimation, is simply one lucky guy; and you conversely are one lucky gal!
I always feel your posts are filled with the greatest of intentions... with the highest dream of romantic fulfillment.. in this way.... Yes.. you are a great deal like my husband... minus 2 things....1) caring about church... but he is very ethical - to a high degree.. I was the christian but he always had more of those "Fruits" about him.. over ME... that's just the truth. 2) He never liked sports, we've never even watched a Super Bowl, we'd both get more excited over the commercials...are we weird or what ! (don't answer!)

That being said, what really attracts me to a woman is: (1) her respect for her body, as well as her mind, (2) Her wit and charm, (3) Her playfulness, naughtiness, and sense of humor, (4) Her empathy for others, more especially children, (5) Cleanliness and pride about her domicile, (6) Being educated and well read, not necessarily college degreed, but having a marked sense of intelligence about her, and finally (7) An overt spirituality as well a deep-seeded reverence and love for God! And to know that, it's never really all that apparent by just the mere number of times that she comes to enter the church narthex per se, but basically by how she projects God's love to the world while she's away from the church!
I very much enjoyed reading your list here, now that sounds like a Keeper!... Reverence for things above.. to me this translates into being Grateful for what we've been given- from the hand of the divine / treating others the way we want to be treated .....I was looking for a quote & found this, thought you might like it ..




And Dear Lord, I can only hope that I would do the same for her!

But isn't it rather strange how any or all of these characteristics can slowly, or even rapidly change, over the course of a given relationship! And to that question, all I can really ask is "Why?
"
I don't know Arbitrator...can I dare say...if you are like my husband, you may be geared a little too "White Knight-ish" .... a tendency when you find Love...or get caught in the whirlwind.... you may put your woman on a Pedestal...and by doing this...your vision somehow misses some of the red flags while dating...(have you married quickly in the past?).... or just "misrepresentation" on her part....her not being fully honest / holding things from you...just not digging deep to get to know one another ...those vulnerable places many fear to tread...

..I can't imagine...if you get to know someone to this degree... if they are honest good women... their ending up cheating behind your back... . but maybe I am just naive....that is just so UGLY.... especially when she has a man who is so easy to talk to...cares about her needs... ya know.. which I assume you are THIS way.
 
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