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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
After reading the thread in the womans section about porn in relationships it got me thinking about how different people view porn. What exactly do you consider to be porn? What is okay, what is not? There are obviously porn sites out there and then there are other types of sites that have pictures of regular people and model type people in clothes (a varying degree of clothes), but not actually doing sexual acts. Just pictures of them.
Where is line, what is porn?
 

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Forget about content, let's look at the big picture.....

Porn is a second sexual option for men and a leveling of the sexual playing field.

No longer do women hold the exclusive power of sexual gatekeepers demanding payment (in a myriad of forms) before they will shell out sexual favors. Men finally have a choice of sexual activity. And for many porn and masturbation will actually come to be preferred to the jumping though hoops one needs to do in order to have partner sex with a woman. For some men the chains of sexual frustration will finally be broken and kowtowing or paying outright to get their sexual needs met has finally be a thing of the past.

One reason porn and masturbation is now so popular is that for a lot of men the sexual experience itself is actually more intense and sexually stimulating than partner sex. And it doesn't come with the various pressures to perform that are demanded when one has sex with a woman or the need to do and say what is expected, even demanded and there will be no need to enter into a relationship in order to enjoy regular sexual activity.

With porn and masturbation there is no pressure, no anxiety, no unmet expectations, no anxiety induced sexual disorders no fear of disease.It is sex that is more in tune with the way men like their
sex- orgasm centered, quick with an enormous amount of the one thing key to the male sexual make-up.....never ending newness and variety. This is big part of which makes it so intensely stimulating and something that simply cannot be replicated in a heterosexual relationship unless the couple are very sexually free and open which is rare.

Now men have a choice and those who find it difficult to obtain partner sex for whatever reason do not feel so left out of the game. It might even benefit them because in order to compete women will have to become more sexually open, not be so picky when it comes to sexual partners. They will need to make themselves more freely available. We already see this in the new "hookup" phenomenon on college campuses where women no longer demand a relationship or other kinds of "payment"
in order to grant sexual access. And for those in sexually bad relationships, who prefer having sex outside of the relationship paradigm, porn is a godsend.

Sex is becoming more recreational and free and not so caught up
in puritan moralistic nonsense, feminine teasing, and demand for payment. I believe this is the future of sex, freed from the bonds of procreation and false morality and stripping women of a good deal of their sexual power over men.

Marriage is changing, relationships are changing and now sex is changing spurned on by free and easy access to other forms of sexual stimulation for men.And this is just the beginning as technology gets more sophisticated
so will these other means of male sexual stimulation. People scoff at those who claim that orgasms obtained through masturbation and porn as simply more intense than with partner sex. But if some men are claiming that now imagine the future with interactive cybersex using 3D immersive technology
and then, in the not so distant future, android technology which will allow any man to to have sex with the girl of his dreams.Her physical and sexual characteristics ordered up like Chinese food.

So to answer your question Porn allows men to be able to experience a level of sexual freedom unknown to them before. Not having to rely on the whims and demands of women in order to have a sexually satisfying experience. Yes romance, relationships and intimacy together with that kind of sex will always be with us but for men who prefer sex unencumbered by emotional attachments porn is becoming their sexual outlet of choice. Safe, cheap and plentiful with unlimited variety.

Porn is here to stay and so are the changes it has brought.
 

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I did not grow up in a porn-saturated environment, so my take is a little different with Mr. B's eloquent article above.

I think, since the existence of easy-to-obtain Internet porn, then it divides men into three camps:

(1) Those who prefer porn and masturbation than real woman
(2) Those who prefer real woman than porn and masturbation
(3) Those who enjoy porn but also enjoy real woman (with various degrees of enjoyment either way)

Therefore, it is important for woman to avoid type #1 man, and focus on finding type #2 man. And maybe, to a certain extent, tolerate #3 man.

Some type #3 man eventually converted to type #2 (some men do get bored of watching porn).

Off course, conversions could happen across all three types. 1 to 2, 2 to 3, 3 to 1, 2 to 1, etc.
 

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Where is line, what is porn?
Porn is by definition sexually explicit or obscene. It includes any and every form of media from the printed page to movies
 

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According to Websters:

the depiction of erotic behavior (as in pictures or writing) intended to cause sexual excitement

material (as books or a photograph) that depicts erotic behavior and is intended to cause sexual excitement

the depiction of acts in a sensational manner so as to arouse a quick intense emotional reaction <the pornography of violence>

So this includes pretty much everything from romance novels, movies, soap opera's to rated X movies. I've debated this with my husband before and lost. LOL
 

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"Obscene literature, art or photography...."
The Random House Unabridged Dictionary


"Obscene writings, drawings, photographs or the like..."
Webster's Encyclopedic Unabridged Dictionary


"Obscene literature, photographs, paintings, etc.... "
The New Lexicon Webster's Dictionary


"Sexually explicit pictures, writing or other material..."
The American Heritage Dictionary


"Literature in which prostitutes figure: Obscene writing..."
The New Webster Encyclopedic Dictionary


"Pornography is Greek for "Writings of Harlots"....The first masterpiece of English pornography is probably John Cleland's Memoirs of the Life of Fanny Hill (1749)"
The Encyclopedia Of Word And Phrase Origins
 

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After reading the thread in the womans section about porn in relationships it got me thinking about how different people view porn. What exactly do you consider to be porn? What is okay, what is not? There are obviously porn sites out there and then there are other types of sites that have pictures of regular people and model type people in clothes (a varying degree of clothes), but not actually doing sexual acts. Just pictures of them.
Where is line, what is porn?
SCOTUS ruled it is hard to define, but you know it when they see it. I gather they have no defined guidelines between porn, erotic art and art.
 

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SCOTUS ruled it is hard to define, but you know it when they see it. I gather they have no defined guidelines between porn, erotic art and art.
"I know it when I see it" is a partial quote of Justice Potter Stewert in the 1964 Jacobellis v. Ohio case. The question at hand was whether the state of Ohio could ban the public showing of the French film, Les Amants (The Lovers) which was considered to be 'Hard core' pornography under the state's obscenity laws.
 

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There's a difference in legal terms between porn and obscenity. At least under U.S. law, not all porn is obscene.
Yes. Obscenity is "..utterly without redeeming social value."

There's also a difference between linguistic definitions and legal definitions. The former is supposed to be objective and therefore neutral as far as what the intent of the presenter/publisher may or may not have been. Not all dictionaries hit that standard though.
 

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Yes. Obscenity is "..utterly without redeeming social value."
Which is why, when I was a kid, most "porn" movies had minimal story lines so that they had some sort of "social value".

Personally, I don't differentiate between "regular" porn and "obscene" porn, but you will when you see it.
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
So what is it when it is pictures of attractive women? Sometimes more clothing, sometimes less, but always technically covering all the important parts. Where does that fall on the spectrum?
 

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So what is it when it is pictures of attractive women? Sometimes more clothing, sometimes less, but always technically covering all the important parts. Where does that fall on the spectrum?
It could fall into the category of visual erotica, but it is not by definition, "Porn." Pornography is the depiction of sexual activity.
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
It could fall into the category of visual erotica, but it is not by definition, "Porn." Pornography is the depiction of sexual activity.
Well that sounds good. Because overall that is what I prefer. Just seeing and imagining someone really attractive or really cute. That's all.
 

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Forget about content, let's look at the big picture.....

Porn is a second sexual option for men and a leveling of the sexual playing field.
I don't think so, many many women have had issues with and will continue to have issues with low drive men, no matter what porn is around. It's an issue that wasn't much spoken of in the past, because most low drive men are embarressed to admit a problem.

Moreover sex and sexuality is an issue that concerns men and women, many women love sex too, however get told to be "good girls". and usually women face the virgin ***** dichotomy, due to societal influences. Women have been sexually repressed and denied their own true sexuality under their own terms forever. It's not women who construct societal values alone, in fact we live in a patriarchal society.



No longer do women hold the exclusive power of sexual gatekeepers demanding payment (in a myriad of forms) before they will shell out sexual favors. Men finally have a choice of sexual activity. And for many porn and masturbation will actually come to be preferred to the jumping though hoops one needs to do in order to have partner sex with a woman. For some men the chains of sexual frustration will finally be broken and kowtowing or paying outright to get their sexual needs met has finally be a thing of the past.
Wow, any men who thinks he has to "pay" for sex, has the wrong mindset to begin with, and if he is easily fooled into believing he can have a happy and fulfilled life with his hand and a computer screen, well I'm glad, because then women won't be duped into dating a man with such limited brain capacity.

One reason porn and masturbation is now so popular is that for a lot of men the sexual experience itself is actually more intense and sexually stimulating than partner sex. And it doesn't come with the various pressures to perform that are demanded when one has sex with a woman or the need to do and say what is expected, even demanded and there will be no need to enter into a relationship in order to enjoy regular sexual activity.
Masturbation has all ways been popular for both men and (gasp) women too. The difference now is the readily available high speed internet porn available around the clock, that is highly addictive and creates unrealistic expectations.

Funny thing is most men still yearn for a connected relationship with a woman. Why?

My guess is that pornography is empty, and no matter how much you masturbate to it it's cold and does not give people the bond and companionship they crave.

With porn and masturbation there is no pressure, no anxiety, no unmet expectations, no anxiety induced sexual disorders no fear of disease.It is sex that is more in tune with the way men like their
sex- orgasm centered, quick with an enormous amount of the one thing key to the male sexual make-up.....never ending newness and variety. This is big part of which makes it so intensely stimulating and something that simply cannot be replicated in a heterosexual relationship unless the couple are very sexually free and open which is rare.
Women have anxiety and pressure about sex too, it's not male exclusive.

That's part of having a good loving relationship, working together, compromising and learning how to have a sex life that's satisfactory to both parties.

Now men have a choice and those who find it difficult to obtain partner sex for whatever reason do not feel so left out of the game.
But they are. because they aren't having sex, they are masturbating. They aren't learning how to interact with women, and if given the chance and choice most of them would still choose to be able to have a partner, however men men who are repeatedly rejected often come out with gems just like this one. You can tell they are obviously angry about rejection and seeking comfort in the wrong places. I feel quite sorry for them.

It might even benefit them because in order to compete women will have to become more sexually open, not be so picky when it comes to sexual partners. They will need to make themselves more freely available. We already see this in the new "hookup" phenomenon on college campuses where women no longer demand a relationship or other kinds of "payment"
in order to grant sexual access. And for those in sexually bad relationships, who prefer having sex outside of the relationship paradigm, porn is a godsend.
There are plenty of men who post on this board who still claim that they want a long term relationship and they want it with a woman who hasn't had hundreds of partners.

While some young people buy into the notion that porn sex is great and people can easily just f%^& and move on, many people try it and find it to be unfullfilling, they feel used and still crave a real connection.

In fact when we have sex with someone we all release oxytocin, and oxytocin is what bonds us to others.

Sex is becoming more recreational and free and not so caught up
in puritan moralistic nonsense, feminine teasing, and demand for payment. I believe this is the future of sex, freed from the bonds of procreation and false morality and stripping women of a good deal of their sexual power over men
.

The fact that you think the future lays in taking humanity out of the equation, I think is the down fall of your argument. Many times through history, societies have become more free with sexual exchange only to swing back to a more conservative stance on sex and sexuality. While I don't believe in shaming people about sex, I also don't believe that acting like sex is nothing special is the answer either, because it most certainly is for many people.

Marriage is changing, relationships are changing and now sex is changing spurned on by free and easy access to other forms of sexual stimulation for men.And this is just the beginning as technology gets more sophisticated
so will these other means of male sexual stimulation. People scoff at those who claim that orgasms obtained through masturbation and porn as simply more intense than with partner sex. But if some men are claiming that now imagine the future with interactive cybersex using 3D immersive technology
and then, in the not so distant future, android technology which will allow any man to to have sex with the girl of his dreams.Her physical and sexual characteristics ordered up like Chinese food.
Yes ever see the documentary about real dolls? Saddest men I've just about ever seen. They take themselves out of the game, because they just can't compete. They have never learned to interact with women, and view them usually as some strange other worldly entity, instead of other human beings, usually speak of women in degrading terms, yet then wonder why no ones interested. But hey they beat everyone, because they can masturbate to porn. Just like the crazy cat lady- she won too and doesn't need a man. :p

So to answer your question Porn allows men to be able to experience a level of sexual freedom unknown to them before. Not having to rely on the whims and demands of women in order to have a sexually satisfying experience. Yes romance, relationships and intimacy together with that kind of sex will always be with us but for men who prefer sex unencumbered by emotional attachments porn is becoming their sexual outlet of choice. Safe, cheap and plentiful with unlimited variety.
yes so free. :rofl:
Is freedom is having no real choice but to whack it off to porn? Or having the choice between your real life wife and a woman on the screen, being unable to appreciate the real beauty in life, love and connection that you would rather use your own hand. OK then :lol:
 

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Mr B seems to have this idea that men in general are constantly deprived of sex and that women use sex as a tool to control them. If that's how you think the society and real relationships work, you've been with the wrong women, and had the wrong experiences. Real intimacy isn't something you can trade for jewelry or gifts, and in today's world normal women view sex in monogamous relationships quite in the same way as men and find it enjoyable, and an expression of love, not a favor you "provide" to your man in exchange for whatever.
I weep for the future of humanity when people will be able to further distance themselves from real connections in pursuit of shallow and superficial values. Porn is getting more and more personal. It went from videos and magazines to webcams and sex chats. Eventually the line between porn and cheating will be blurred out. There's probably going to be virtual reality sex, and at that point, do you still call it porn? Or does it cross the line? I see a lot of people leaning heavily into these things and when it becomes even more real and advanced, it will become an even bigger problem for those prone to getting hooked on it. Think of way more failed relationships and more people trying to replace a possibility of a connection with another human being with a fantasy world.
It can sure be great for those that are unhappy/sexually supressed/can't find a mate, but it will open up a door into an entirely new world of issues concerning closure and artificially established overblown expectations which will result in inevitable disappointment caused by these expectations not being met when colliding with the reality, therefore resulting into withdrawal from reality, succumbing into fantasy, and inability to enjoy what is real and normal.
 
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