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Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
I recall while I was sitting with my STBXW once and she got a text message from a "female" friend (according to the contact name) that said:

"All of a sudden want to meet up. Want to open you up wide!"

To which she laughed and replied to this "female" friend, "What are you talking about?"
 

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Its dubious but not enough by itself. I myself have had many inside jokes with friends before but nonetheless, if something unsettles you, time to do a little phone snooping.

By unsettle I mean slight suspicion.

If you're like hearing a man's voice on the phone and shes saying its a female or something like that then its time to get full steam ahead on the digging.
 

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I recall while I was sitting with my wife once and she got a text message from a "female" friend (according to the contact name) that said:

"All of a sudden want to meet up. Want to open you up wide!"

To which she laughed and replied to this "female" friend, "What are you talking about?"
Truthfully, I don't believe it's a female and I think it's a sexting situation that is ready to escalate to a meeting. I think it came through at an inopportune time with you there and she played dumb.
Often a cheater will store the name of the other person as a female friend.

You need to fill in more detail for the people on this forum to help you navigate this situation.
Are ther other signs that make you wonder?
Do you and your wife have a healthy sex life?
Is she out without you much?
Does she have time that's unaccounted for?
Has she started acting strange in the recent past?
 

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I recall while I was sitting with my STBXW once and she got a text message from a "female" friend (according to the contact name) that said:

"All of a sudden want to meet up. Want to open you up wide!"

To which she laughed and replied to this "female" friend, "What are you talking about?"
I think it's a little weird to say something like that to a female friend, to be honest. Maybe my mind is in the gutter, but the last sentence has a sexual tone to it.

I'd be a bit suspicious.
 

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I recall while I was sitting with my STBXW once and she got a text message from a "female" friend (according to the contact name) that said:

"All of a sudden want to meet up. Want to open you up wide!"

To which she laughed and replied to this "female" friend, "What are you talking about?"
Could be an inside joke? Or a guy?

How long ago do you recall this happened?
 

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Hmm...I'd call the number from a pay phone (if you can still find one), or at least a number in no way tied to you. You'll probably get voicemail, should tell you all you need to know. If they answer, you'll have your answer, and just say wrong number and hang up.

Or you can pay 5-10 bucks on a reverse phone lookup and there's a 50/50 chance you'll get info in who it's registered to.
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If that contact is deleted from her contacts or if the phone is now locked, time to be more suspicious. But don't confront until you at least know if she was lying about who the contact was.
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Sorry! But is just screams as being from a man rather than a woman, strictly for its sexual connotation. Can't really see a woman sending a message such as that!

At best, it more than sounds suspicious! Fastly time to play Sherlock Holmes!
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
If she was my soon to be ex wife, I wouldn't care.

T
I agree. But we aren't getting a divorce because of an affair, it's for other reasons. Since we've now firmly decided on a divorce, she's been acting completely evasive about what she plans to do after a separation which has aroused my suspicion and has my mind racing back to events such as this.
 

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Yea the open you up wide part seems quite obvious.

Hmm...I'd call the number from a pay phone (if you can still find one), or at least a number in no way tied to you. You'll probably get voicemail, should tell you all you need to know. If they answer, you'll have your answer, and just say wrong number and hang up.

Or you can pay 5-10 bucks on a reverse phone lookup and there's a 50/50 chance you'll get info in who it's registered to.
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Do as Shamwow suggested and that'll be one less "what if" to worry about in the future.
 

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That text is defiantly from a man!
 

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I agree. But we aren't getting a divorce because of an affair, it's for other reasons. Since we've now firmly decided on a divorce, she's been acting completely evasive about what she plans to do after a separation which has aroused my suspicion and has my mind racing back to events such as this.
If you are divorcing, it really doesn't matter. For whatever reason, you two have decided to part ways. Move on with your life. Leave the past in the past.

Do you have children with her? If not, her post-divorce plans are none of your concern.
 

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Use this: Free Cell Number Search | Spy Dialer

it will go straight to his voicemail and his phone will not ring.
plus it will call from the computer not your phone. So it is anonymous and you get to hear the outgoing recorded message.
Ok, I just tested this on wife's phone, and it never rang, but it left her a VM that has some comical sounding voice saying "ha ha ha you have been spy dialed. www. spydialer.com"

Still no way it could be traced back to your computer. but clearly not totally transparent.
 

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^^Didn't do that on mine.

Just use a payphone and call that number. Ask for malcolm when answered and when they say its wrong number ask them who's number is this, I got it from bla bla regarding this and that. They should say at least the first name.
 

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Woman will sometimes say weird things to their female friends.

We had one colleague who had enormous breasts. One day a female friend of hers came to hang out in the office with her and she said, loudly, "Hey, xxxx, how are your bad boys doing?" Pointing at her breasts.

xxxx jiggled them and said: "My bad boys are pretty good, thanks for asking!"

Oh. Damn. Just remembered. They had at least one sexual encounter ("just experimenting") so even if a female does send a message to another female it might still be of a sexual nature.
 
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