Talk About Marriage banner
Status
Not open for further replies.
1 - 4 of 4 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
9 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Its been a couple of weeks since I confronted my wife about her affair. Things have actually been going as well as I think they could. Our two therapy sessions have been possitive she has been up front about any meetings, or conversations with the other man (her co-worker) and thankfully he is going back to Zurich this weekend (for 6 months). I can honestly say she has done almost everything I ask when it comes to working it out. Here is the problem. First let me say that my wife is and has always been a private person (I can live with that). So living a transparent life while we patch things up is very hard for her. The problem is I am still checking cell records and her blackberry every now and then just to make sure I am not missing anything that I am not aware of. I then ask my wife if I find somthing questionable. We had a big fight over me "sneeking" a look at her blackberry ( there really has been nothing of interest) because she says that I have too deep an interest in her professional life. I told her that I would not be as interested in her career but that is where affair happened. She stormed out of the house the morning mad but I feel like I am owed every bit of her privacy at least for a short time until I can start to trust her again and I do believe I can. My question is do I have the right to check her e-mail, cell records, etc... or Do I need to respect her and give her a "little" privacy". Has anyone been through somthing similar or is there a compromise position I can take. I did tell her that instead of sneeking a look I would ask her first she said fine but you know how words like that somtimes have double meanings.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4 Posts
I think you have a right to look at those things, and if she wants the relationship to recover from the affiar, she should try to lead a transparent life for a while so you can build your trust back.

While it may be uncomfortable to have a spouse putting your 'affairs' (literally & figuratively) under the microscope for a while, it's a lot more uncomfortable being the one that got cheated on and a small price to pay to help your relationship recover.

If she doesn't allow this it could also be a sign that she wants to continue her private life in some way.
 
1 - 4 of 4 Posts
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top