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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
My wife and I have been together now for 7 years including dating. We have a 5 year old little girl that means everything to me. However, in the past 3 years I have had to practically beg my wife for sex. Before all the women out there tell me i need to do this or that let me explain the situation. My wife was molested as a young child. When we first got together she once told me that she was surprised we "did it" as many times as we did because she had never done so with her exes. I should have listened. There is no trying to "romance" her, as it brings up past memories, etc. At this point we only have sex about once every other month. It is driving me crazy!!! Any advice?
 

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It sounds like she was more sexually active earlier on in your relationship. Is this true?
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
She was more sexually active in the begining of the relationship. But now we may go a month or more without sex. Also we are both fairly young, I am 29 she is 32.
 

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She was more sexually active in the begining of the relationship. But now we may go a month or more without sex. Also we are both fairly young, I am 29 she is 32.
You can rule out the molestation as the cause of your current sexless marriage.

She may very well be uncomfortable around the issue of sex due to her past, but dont use it as a cop-out. You have historical evidence on your side.

You cant force her to have sex... well you can.... but really you cant change her. Only yourself. Im not a woman, but a man, so maybe this will mean more coming from me. You have to understand that its very likely that you arent giving her the affection she requires in order to become sexual with her. For a lot of women, foreplay is an all day affair that doesnt require physical intimacy.

As a rule of thumb in my marriage, signs of affection from me, are returned sexually by my wife. This isnt an agreement, but a dynamic I have noticed.

You need to take note of what goes on in your relationship. Its astonishing how many people spend soooo bloody much time upgrading their schooling, or taking new courses for work, or learning about the affects of consuming alcohol with simple carbohydrates... But we, as a society dont put this typf of effort into our initmate relationships... And thats why we fail.
 

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Therapy...may be she has fallen out of love -may be its something to do with her hormone -i am only guessing ..sleeping with you that once a month is like giving you a candy for being a good boy the whole month ...have a good discussion with her and counselling should help.
 
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