[Airbus]

We have an 8 year old son together, and I am now married to someone else; recently, my ex has started calling me the jokey pet name we used to use for one another. WTF? We've been finished for years. A little late to start back up with that again, not to mention a tad inappropriate.

Any thoughts? What should I do? If he's doing it to stir me up I don't want to let him think he's stirring me up, know what I mean?

 

[Jellybeans]

Tell him "Please do not call me that anymore. We aren't together anymore."



********************** | ***************************************** | ***************************************

 

[Airbus]

Why is it that I'm afraid to even do that???

 

[Jellybeans]

Only you can answer that



********************** | ***************************************** | ***************************************

 

[IrishGirlVA]

Tell him it makes you uncomfortable. If he continues doing it, despite him knowing it makes you feel uncomfortable, then it'll get you pissed off enough to have the guts to tell him to stop.

 

[Toffer]

Ignore it

Don't rise to the bait at all and eventually he'll stop

 

[I'mInLoveWithMyHubby]

My ex h told me to leave my husband a few years after I married my him. I told my ex that would never happen and it's highly inappropriate. My ex grew to hate me. Finally the feelings were mutual between the two of us. Except my ex h can not help himself and be civil when talking. He likes to scream at the top of his lungs. Luckily I could hang the phone up and not listen to his garbage any longer.

I'm glad that was short lived and I no longer have contact with him. He disowned and shunned his child a few years ago. My now adult child is not allowed to have any contact with her siblings.

My ex h is a cheating abusive person. I'm so glad I left when I did.

 

[Airbus]

The reason I hesitate to say anything to him (I should not have used the word afraid) is because it's such a silly name that we gave each other...it's not a lovey-duvy thing, it's just stupidity...and I don't want to rise to the bait if that's what it even is. Or he could be just being absent minded and it means nothing. I mean, the name is 'Dirt Turkey', hardly any romanticism there, eh?

It just feels funny to hear him say it, that's all. Things ended very badly between us; perhaps it's his way of trying to be friends.

 

[3Xnocharm]

Just dont mention it, and if he says it again, just say "please dont call me that". Drama free that way.

 

[Jellybeans]

You could either ignore it like it doesn't bother you (which it does) or you could say something because of the fact it bothers you.

I've found that by pretendingt like there isn't issue doesn't really resolve the issue.

Your call though.



********************** | ***************************************** | ***************************************

 

[Airbus]

I think I will do both; I'll wait a bit, see if it continues, say I'll give it another 10 days. If it stops great. If not, then I say something.

At least it gives me time to work up the nerve to say stop.

 

[CanadianGuy]

I get the feeling that if you ask him to stop he may not as he can see it's affecting you. I recommend asking him why after so many years he has decided to call you that. ( in a interested yet disinterested type of way ) Then tell him you think it's "silly" as that was so long ago.

 

[Airbus]

I know I should say something right away, but am hesitant to rock the boat. As I said, we had a terrible ending, and now that things are better between us I wand to keep them that way for the sake of our son. Maybe I'll just mention it the next time he says it. Probably a better idea than to just let him keep going and THEN say something after he's said it, like, a hundred times.

 

[SlowlyGettingWiser]

Tell him to stop as you no longer like it, you're no longer with him, and it's no longer appropriate.

 

[Jake56]

Like everyone else said just talk to him about it, you are both adults after all. You can always also just tell him to stop it in a polite way. Let us know how it works out

 

[heavensangel]

Is he married/seeing anyone? Maybe flirting with you/trying to regain your attention? I ask because my ex, sick pervert that he is, has asked me before when dropping the kids off for his visitation, if I wanted to have sex 'for old times' sake'. Disgusting A*$!!!

Because your relationship ended badly, as did mine, I'd IGNORE him!! IMO, the moment he knows it bothers you, he may do it more often.

 

[questar1]

It is his way of claiming and pursuing a special connection with you and therefore is technically a form of stalking.
Does that help you see what's really going on? and what you need to do?

 

[NextTimeAround]

I get the feeling that if you ask him to stop he may not as he can see it's affecting you. I recommend asking him why after so many years he has decided to call you that. ( in a interested yet disinterested type of way ) Then tell him you think it's "silly" as that was so long ago.

If you're good with a cutting tone of voice you could ask "and your point is?"

I would directly remind him of your proper name and if he persists simply pretend as if he calling for someone else.

 

[galian84]

I'd ignore it. Hopefully, eventually he'll see that it isn't working and he'll stop.

If he doesn't get the hint, as everyone else suggested, tell him that it makes you uncomfortable and that he needs to stop.