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We've been having a discussion about being a new couple and going to weddings and how much to spend on wedding gifts and how to pay for them.

What are your thoughts?

Thanks for your time.
 

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Over the years my wife and I have had the pleasure of attending the weddings (average 2 -3 a year) of many of our friends and family.

Since we have been married neither of us has had a wedding invite that was not at least +1 but we have had a couple that were "sorry no children" at the evening do etc. If we can go to a wedding then we do and we always take / send a gift (people who let you know who they are registered with are great).


As for how much to spend there are lots of things to consider, are you or your children "playing a role" (best man. matron of honor, bridesmaid, page boy) have you got to pay out for new outfits, travel, accommodation, drinks etc.

For us as a family we are fortunate enough to have a certain amount of money each month for discretionary spending so that (or a multiple of it) is our total budget. I would not go into debt, or raid my long term savings for a gift even if that meant I could afford only a token gift and a handmade / written card.

Choosing a gift used to be easier as most couples were setting up home for the first time together so a gift could be anything for that home but as the age of first time marriages and the number of second or subsequent marriages mean that most couple have most of what they need for the home already.

Whilst on the subject of weddings I am both alarmed and ashamed about the enormous amounts of money that some couple fell the need to spend on their “big day”. We went to a family weeding early last year that started at a local hotel for a weeding breakfast for (50 people) at 10:00, Convoy to the Church for a 12:00 service, 13:30 Convoy to a local ruined castle for the formal photographs, 14:30 Convoy to the country club for Wedding Lunch (100 people), Stay on at the country club for the evening entertainment (live band) and a buffet for (200 people). With what that little lot cost they could have paid a mortgage for a year.
 

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It actually depends on what souveniers you want to use. If you want foods like cupcakes or mini figures then the price would be different.
 

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Why not go on dates rather then attend weddings?

Are you invited to these weddings or are you wedding crashers.;) I don't know any couples who went mainly to weddings as dates.

For the gift price, it depends how well you know the couple and what your income allows. Just remember that the meal given to you at these weddings are paid by the bride/groom. The cheapest would be roughly $10-20 per plate. This is not including appetizers and drinks.
 
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