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On the first valentines with the mother of my children, I bought ruby earrings and a matching necklace and we cuddled on the couch. We had been dating for for two months at that time and I said, "I love you" for the first time. She said something about liking me too though I don't think she was really ready to.

In the beginning of the relationship, I would take her out, buy her flowers, and she'd usually get frisky with me.

Later in the relationship, I would usually cook her favorite meal (baked salmon, rice, sauteed asparagus, and white wine), usually get flowers, and we'd watch one of the "romantic" movies she'd been wanting to watch. It was a coin flip if she made it to the end of the movie before falling asleep.

The last few years we were together, I'd arrange babysitting, we'd go out to eat, and come home to watch the movie she wanted to watch. If she was still awake when it was over, she'd insist on starting another one.

This is the second V-Day since she moved out. Over the last couple years I have gotten over the excitement of "celebrating" it. I have some frozen salmon in the freezer. I'll probably make it for irony's sake.
 

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Not a damn thing. Stopped doing anything 5 years ago after telling her she could have a divorce if she wanted it.
 

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So she'll make you steak for breakfast then. Steak n eggs and then a bj. Nice way to start the day.
You are a kind and generous soul. No, what this means is that since we are waking up early for some work thing of hers, that I'm required to attend, She will skip the steak, and eat biscuits and gravy at her favorite place. I can have steak and eggs if I'm up to it. Lately I eat a small fruit for breakfast. She promised sex Wednesday night. I'm not counting on it. But, after all it is valentines, not Mar 14th.

The confusing and frustrating bit is not the "promises you don't intend to keep", it is the assignment for me to plan all dates, recreation, and vacations, and her hobby of changing every single facet of every single thing I plan. Which brings us back to Saturday . . . .
 

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I'm frustrated that I have no SO and I'm still concerned about vday.

Like ... I'm afraid to ask a girl I'm dating out on that day because it may mean too much... ugh. F#@k hallmark :)

I think it would be better if vday was like thanksgiving, only on a Tuesday.... Only the people who really cared would feel it necessary.
 

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I'm frustrated that I have no SO and I'm still concerned about vday.

Like ... I'm afraid to ask a girl I'm dating out on that day because it may mean too much... ugh. F#@k hallmark :)

I think it would be better if vday was like thanksgiving, only on a Tuesday.... Only the people who really cared would feel it necessary.
Just ask her out, it doesn't mean what you think it means.

Whereas deliberately NOT asking her out so as to not give her any ideas will be obvious to her!!

Trust me on this.

Just treat it like any other Friday night date. Clink your glasses and say "happy vday" once and drop it. No gift, no flowers. That's all you have to do in order to acknowledge the date without her getting any ideas about what it means. It means you wanted to take her on a date, that's enough and that's plenty good.

If she brings you a gift or a card, just say aw that's sweet and don't make a big deal out of it.
 

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So are you saying that you have always knowingly refused to acknowledge a day that you knew your wife regarded as soecial?

How did you expect that to go over year after year?
Yes, because it's a stupid day. Don't worry though, she found someone else to celebrate with and **** one Valentine's Day long ago. That started a 4 year long affair, so I guess she got a few more Valentine's Days out of it. Or I could celebrate a stupid holiday and the start of her affair all at once. That'd be fun!
Wrong guy to throw that on.
You probably should have read his backstory before that accusatory post.

IMO it's just another Hallmark holiday to boost the bottom line at card and candy companies.
 

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I'm frustrated that I have no SO and I'm still concerned about vday.

Like ... I'm afraid to ask a girl I'm dating out on that day because it may mean too much... ugh. F#@k hallmark <a href="http://talkaboutmarriage.com/images/smilies/smile.gif" border="0" alt="" title="Smile" >:)</a>

I think it would be better if vday was like thanksgiving, only on a Tuesday.... Only the people who really cared would feel it necessary.
Is this the lady that asked you if you could take on her ex in a throw down?
 

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What are you doing for your significant other for valentines day?
Giving him a card.

What WOULD you like your significant other to do for you?
Exchanging a card with me.

Does anyone decorate and actually get into Valentine’s Day?
The first one we shared together, he went all out with decorations, plans and such. It was adorable. After we moved in together, and finances were tight, I baked him a chocolate heart-shaped cake with 'I love you' spelled out. He got me a second-hand vinyl record. After a few years, the gifts and decorations weren't really important to either of us. We do random stuff for one another at other times. However, we did continue exchanging a card (the meaning being in what we write to one another) each year for Feb 14th.
 

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My wife and I don't do anything really special for Valentine's Day. It's a made up "holiday" and in my opinion it's the other 364 days of the year that count just as much in how you treat your significant other. I don't have any problem with those who go all out for Valentine's Day, but that's just not for us.
What's your take on holding up a boom-box to the window?
 

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Discussion Starter #52
Well I love Valentine’s Day. And I will always be corny and make a big deal out of it regardless if the person I’m with cares or not. To me it’s a day to show your special someone you love them. So they will get forced fed my love if I can help it :)

My ex and I are back together and this will be our first vday together. We are making a gourmet dinner together and staying in. I’ll probably decorate with pink and red balloons, and I always make heart shaped pink pancakes in the morning.
 

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Is this the lady that asked you if you could take on her ex in a throw down?
No... that was a next.

This is a someone else that I really like. I have a dinner date with her tomorrow. I decided to duck the valentine date. <a href="http://talkaboutmarriage.com/images/smilies/smile.gif" border="0" alt="" title="Smile" >:)</a>
Dang. You've taken off with this dating thing. Good for you.
 

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Dang. You've taken off with this dating thing. Good for you.
Well... I've only been on 5 dates since the break with my 4 month relationship last month.

3 of them have been with the woman I'm meeting tomorrow. I met her at a meetup (music show).

I think we are pretty close in spirit. We've had some similar experiences.

I almost gave up on her because I hadn't found way to move it past the friendship zone, but we finally made out a little on Sunday. :)
 

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Alright, so my husband had a beautiful bunch of flowers waiting for me when I got home, ready for the 14th... and, not knowing this, I'd stopped at the store on the way home and decided to get him a little sumpn too. When he presented me with the flowers, I presented him with the equivalent of flowers - peanut m&m's and a car magazine. Cards being exchanged evening of the 14th ;)
 

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Haven't read the thread really but chiming in anyway. So basically I am probably the worst boyfriend ever for Christmas, V-Day, and anniversaries. Its just not my thing at all. Its so bad that I literally warn the woman that have the misfortune of being my significant other. I tend to focus on everyday. I am thoughtful in ways that most aren't on non holidays. I literally always surprise with gifts, trips, and thoughtful gestures all the time. But on holidays I am always awful. It simply is not my super power. So this year my girlfriend says, babe you do so much for me, don't worry about Valentines day. I believed her...

Ok...so I can hear you guys laughing. I literally got her nothing for Valentines day. Because she was adamant she didn't want anything. So I get to work and I have a Fed Ex package. Inside is a heartfelt handwritten card, and a book. Inside the book are pages and pages of boudoir photos in lingerie. My name is on the cover of the book too, and the last page has more loving words on it about us and our relationship.. Then I go to her social media page, and she has a picture of us up saying she is with the love of her life. Ughhhh...talk about pressure. I hastily arranged to have four dozen roses delivered to her, and I also sent her a gift card to a high end lingerie shop that she loves. I am an idiot!!!! Fellas...Never listen to your lady when she tells you she doesn't want anything.

How am I supposed to give her nothing when she sent me a gift! Had I known I would have had one. I should have known better. I really really should have. For some reason I believed her. When I got home from work she sent me text saying open your freezer. Inside was a Dairy Queen ice cream cake that says I love you. Good grief. I am literally never listening to a woman again when they say they don't want anything! How am I supposed to accept those things and get her nothing. Sigh...I think I did well last minute though. But not falling into that trap again.
 

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I dont need a self proclaimed retailer's day to tell me that I'm supposed to do something special for my wife. We've agreed that Valentines day is ridiculous and so it is just another day as far as we are concerned. We will do something special on a day that really means something to us - our anniversary.
 
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