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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I don't really know what to do or think right now with my wife. Fast forward everything good that happened tonight, we had a fight. I bought her cuffs which was a gesture that I was ready to trust her again when it comes to bondage and she was very delighted at first. So anyways, went home, and she wouldn't listen to safewords. So I yelled at her and she let me go, then we argued.

She says that I'm acting up and that she didn't do anything to hurt me, I told her that it's not easy for me to regain trust in her after what she did years ago to me when I was tied up, and her refusal to listen to safewords even taking the piss outta the fact that I tried to enforce safewords to her made me just lose it.

So we went our seperate ways. No sex tonight. Fk V-day. It SUCKS *sigh*
 

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Discussion Starter · #2 ·
Hell maybe it's the alcohol, I've quit, but maybe those 3 drinks after so long sober has got into me. Hell I don't know anymore... I wanted tonight to be fun and perfect, I can't believe this happened
 

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I don't really know what to do or think right now with my wife. Fast forward everything good that happened tonight, we had a fight. I bought her cuffs which was a gesture that I was ready to trust her again when it comes to bondage and she was very delighted at first. So anyways, went home, and she wouldn't listen to safewords. So I yelled at her and she let me go, then we argued.

She says that I'm acting up and that she didn't do anything to hurt me, I told her that it's not easy for me to regain trust in her after what she did years ago to me when I was tied up, and her refusal to listen to safewords even taking the piss outta the fact that I tried to enforce safewords to her made me just lose it.

So we went our seperate ways. No sex tonight. Fk V-day. It SUCKS *sigh*
Forgive me, but I'm going to be blunt. Your wife's a nut job. Seriously. Tying you up and not listing to safe words is abuse. She sounds like she has antisocial tendencies. I'd have those divorce papers written up fast, along with an order of protection.
 

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Can't say that I fully understand what happened but not listening to safewords is a big no no.

Do you think she wanted to hurt you intentionally when she received control or she is sadistic by nature and felt you were too sensitive and scared?
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
If that's the case, she broke my heart tonight...

Everything was going good why must this happen? Of course she blames everything on me, I'm not even reading her texts after the first one she sent me.

She didn't hurt me no, not yet, I just wasn't feeling really comfortable and I thought especially now since we're seperated and trying to make things work that she would be more cautious and understanding but instead she just ignored me.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
I feel like dying, why the hell does she have to do this when I'm so VULNERABLE I was falling in love with her all over again and she has to do THIS?!
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Hell think I'm just going to try to sleep this off and hopefully I'll feel better in the morning. So much for reconciliation
 

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I feel like dying, why the hell does she have to do this when I'm so VULNERABLE I was falling in love with her all over again and she has to do THIS?!
I'm so sorry you're having a tough time. It's so sad when the people we love disappoint us and aren't the people we wanted them to be. I think you both need MC.

How long have you been married?
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Was she caught up in the moment? Had a few drinks?
A few yeah but I know her, she wasn't drunk AT ALL.

I'm so sorry you're having a tough time. It's so sad when the people we love disappoint us and aren't the people we wanted them to be. I think you both need MC.

How long have you been married?
We are doing MC, I guess this is something to bring up... *sighs*
Married 4 years, 7 year relationship.

I don't know anymore, I am home alone depressed with my wife sending me abusive msgs that I'm not even going to read after the first one she sent me.
 

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A few yeah but I know her, she wasn't drunk AT ALL.



We are doing MC, I guess this is something to bring up... *sighs*
Married 4 years, 7 year relationship.

I don't know anymore, I am home alone depressed with my wife sending me abusive msgs that I'm not even going to read after the first one she sent me.
Is MC helping?
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
It did for a while, and we've been going good actually, hell we haven't had a fight since seperation we even had a very passionate rough session a few nights ago. That's probably why it hurts so much now...

So we have all the couples holding each other tonight and me and my wife... pffft. WHAT A DAY TO PICK A FIGHT!
Fk this... I don't know what to think anymore
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
Chicken sh-t eh? It turns you off eh? Fk my wife

Hell she's PISSING ME OFF SO MUCH RIGHT NOW I SHOULDNT BE READING HER MSGS BUT FK HER
FK MARRIAGE
FK RELATIONSHIPS
FK VALENTINES
FK RECONCILIATION
FK LOVE
FK THIS!!!!

I'm FKING OUTTA HERE
 

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It did for a while, and we've been going good actually, hell we haven't had a fight since seperation we even had a very passionate rough session a few nights ago. That's probably why it hurts so much now...

So we have all the couples holding each other tonight and me and my wife... pffft. WHAT A DAY TO PICK A FIGHT!
Fk this... I don't know what to think anymore
Maybe you can contact the therapist and see if you can have a session tonight?
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
It's midnight... *sighs*

I should sleep this off... thanks though, for helping a man through this. I feel like just giving everything up now
 

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Just my opinion, but I would not be doing any bondage play during a reconcilliation. She is sending you abusive text...really no more bondage till she gets her act together. Even in the best of times "no honor safe word....no bondage!" Sounds like you spouse has some control and anger issues. I know this won't be easy but you need to ignore her behavior and not let her see your upset. That plays into her controling side. Just send her a text message back saying "play by the rules or we don't play at all". Sorry your Vday turned out so poorly...hang in there.
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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
So she went to counselling, so she decided to give us a chance after all I've done, so blah blah blah, and oh yeah, by getting pissed off over her not respecting boundaries means I'm chicken sh-t. Oh yeah I turn her off.

Why do I feel like going out again even if I'm depressed as fk and to cheat on her so I can say "chicken sh-t eh? Look who I'm fking now you fking *****"

*sighs* No... screw that, I wont do it. Just going to sleep it off
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
Just my opinion, but I would not be doing any bondage play during a reconcilliation. She is sending you abusive text...really no more bondage till she gets her act together. Even in the best of times "no honor safe word....no bondage!" Sounds like you spouse has some control and anger issues. I know this won't be easy but you need to isnore her behavior and not let her see your upset. That plays into her controling side. Just send her a text message back saying "play by the rules or we din't play at all". Sorry your Vday turned out so poorly...hang in there.
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Alright, I'm going to send that, then I'm going to call it the night.

*sighs* the cuffs was a bad idea. REALLY FKING BAD IDEA. I just thought I could trust her after all this...
 

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I dont know your relationship dynamics, sounds like she is the dom and u the sub...clearly you arnt giving her what she needs ie. bowing down to her will.

If in real life you come across as you do in these posts, whining and emo, then I can see why she isnt attracted to you. Man up, grow some balls, tie her up and spank her ass!
 
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