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Hello there,
Hope everything is going well with you guys. So here is my problem. I posted a month ago about it but obviously i couldn't solve my problem on my own.
I have feelings for this friend of mine who isn't into me at all. I have been advised to stop this friendship and just move on. Well, i tried many times but failed. The last time i told him frankly that i have feelings for him and that i can't be friends with him. He texted me later despite of this and i texted him back !!!

Now i don't know what to do. I know in my heart of hearts that i have to stop this. It is consuming my energy. I am starting a postgraduate study next week and i can't continue doing this. I love him dearly but i know i have to stop. I was thinking i should go for counseling in order for me to know why i am so weak ?

I have got a fight with my sister last week and i stopped all contact with her right away ( no difficulty at all ) . A bit of guilt but that's all :(

feel free to be harsh if you need to :(
 

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Honey, You have to consciously DECIDE not to contact him again.

Decide he is not respecting you to keep texting you back.
If you have to , say something very mean & spiteful to him, so that he will leave you alone.

I promise after a few days, you'll feel better.. Then a week or two, it will get easier... After a month.. You'll still yearn to talk to him, or wonder what he's up to, but by then, you will have broken the chain of consuming every minute with thinking of him. You WILL start to be able to think of other things first.. and eventually down the road it'll just be an occasional "what's he up to?" thought. When that happens. Tell yourself he's doing fine. If there was something drastically wrong, you'd have read about him in the paper.
 

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What did he say when you had feelings for him? Have you known him a long time? Is the crush sudden or has it been happening a long time now?

Like Chelle said--you will have to consciously make an effort to go no contact/not be around him. Don't stalk his FB or other networkings.

I would not recommend saying something mean or spiteful to him like C said--just go no contact and keep a low profile w/ him.

Crushes... they are so fun but they can suck sometimes when not reciprocal.



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Ok I just went back through your previous posts.

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/general-relationship-discussion/53337-he-getting-married-how-cope.html

You really need to stop this, Jane.

He is getting married. IMO, it was wrong of you to spell your feelings out to him while he was engaged to marry another (and soon).

BUT it's done now. You NEED to end all contact with him. If you have to, block his # and FB and however else you're keeping in touch.

This is a disaster waiting to happen. How would you feel if you were his fiance and this was going on???

Save yourself and your sanity and go no contact.

You aid "he doesn't have feelings for me at all" but that is even MORE irrelevant now because the truth is: he's getting married to someone else.

Jane.... this is a 2x4. STOP ALL CONTACT WITH HIM IMMEDIATELY.

Block him from every single way he can get a hold of you. You can do this if you truly WANT to do this.

It's very unhealthy to pine after someone who is unavailable to you emotionally and betrothed to another.



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"I was thinking i should go for counseling in order for me to know why i am so weak ?"

DING! DING! DING! We have a winner!

Yes, try counseling NOW
 
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