Joined
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4 Posts
Please excuse me, for this is my first post.
(Background)
My husband and I were high school best friends. He knocked up a girl in high school. They had the baby, and it soon became a triangle relationship. I joined the military, was without him for a year. Now me and my best friend have been married for 9 years. We never live in the same spot for longer than 3 to 4 years. We now have 2 children of our own.
I am a control fanatic, bad quality... I want to have a plan. If we go somewhere, I want to know we can financially do it. When his daughter comes to the house, I want to have tickets bought ahead of time. If it is a Friday night, I want to know what is going on this weekend, so I can get everything together the night before. My husband plans nothing. He is a very calm guy. I am high strung.
1 of our many problems
I feel like we are just room mates. We are not affectionate. Well, we aren't the lovey dovey type of people anyways. But now we aren't ever.... (He doesn't sleep in the same room with me. He hasn't ever really. For years he worked night shift. And he gets up and down all night. We just don't sleep together.) Our room was for relationship purposes if we are in it together. Well, that hasn't happened in a while. He calls it "circuit city". I do have my laptop in my room, b/c I do my homework in there. I am active duty and I am a full time student. I usually do my homework at night.
On the weekends, I beg for him to spend time with me. His answer is always well he wants to hang out with a friend. His friends are our neighbors, but it's every single weekend. They drink all night, while I play the WII with the kids or they watch a kids movie, and I just sit alone like normal. I am not one who just likes to party every weekend. I am a mother first and foremost. My kids are not going to see me like that. Every now and then to have adult time, and I get a sitter, is okay. But I am telling you this is every single weekend that he parties like he is still a kid.
***So tonight, I got the same response, he wants to hang out with his friends. So I text him, and ask him about a place we went last year. It's about an hour away. He said what about our game - we are big football fans. I asked him if we could go before. I just wanted to get the kids out of the house, and it's starting to cool off, my fav time of year. Well, he blows me off again. So I text him at midnight, and ask him to come and talk to me for a minute. He doesn't respond. So at 3:30am, I am pissed. I call and call, and tell him that I am so tired of this. Well, he just says "I'm going to sleep." On the couch I remind you.
We just have no relationship whatsoever... I just want to sit here and cry.
(Background)
My husband and I were high school best friends. He knocked up a girl in high school. They had the baby, and it soon became a triangle relationship. I joined the military, was without him for a year. Now me and my best friend have been married for 9 years. We never live in the same spot for longer than 3 to 4 years. We now have 2 children of our own.
I am a control fanatic, bad quality... I want to have a plan. If we go somewhere, I want to know we can financially do it. When his daughter comes to the house, I want to have tickets bought ahead of time. If it is a Friday night, I want to know what is going on this weekend, so I can get everything together the night before. My husband plans nothing. He is a very calm guy. I am high strung.
1 of our many problems
I feel like we are just room mates. We are not affectionate. Well, we aren't the lovey dovey type of people anyways. But now we aren't ever.... (He doesn't sleep in the same room with me. He hasn't ever really. For years he worked night shift. And he gets up and down all night. We just don't sleep together.) Our room was for relationship purposes if we are in it together. Well, that hasn't happened in a while. He calls it "circuit city". I do have my laptop in my room, b/c I do my homework in there. I am active duty and I am a full time student. I usually do my homework at night.
On the weekends, I beg for him to spend time with me. His answer is always well he wants to hang out with a friend. His friends are our neighbors, but it's every single weekend. They drink all night, while I play the WII with the kids or they watch a kids movie, and I just sit alone like normal. I am not one who just likes to party every weekend. I am a mother first and foremost. My kids are not going to see me like that. Every now and then to have adult time, and I get a sitter, is okay. But I am telling you this is every single weekend that he parties like he is still a kid.
***So tonight, I got the same response, he wants to hang out with his friends. So I text him, and ask him about a place we went last year. It's about an hour away. He said what about our game - we are big football fans. I asked him if we could go before. I just wanted to get the kids out of the house, and it's starting to cool off, my fav time of year. Well, he blows me off again. So I text him at midnight, and ask him to come and talk to me for a minute. He doesn't respond. So at 3:30am, I am pissed. I call and call, and tell him that I am so tired of this. Well, he just says "I'm going to sleep." On the couch I remind you.
We just have no relationship whatsoever... I just want to sit here and cry.