MJJEAN thanks for clarifying that. I really have to read more carefully.@kindMe77 and @Manchester
This man hasn't worked BY CHOICE for approximately 8 of the last 10 YEARS. That is quite a different sitaution than a man who has lost his career due to circumstances. He isn't doing very much at home, bare minimum re: chores and below the bare minimum re: the relationship. OP clearly stated this "man" isn't even looking for work (one application a week on average) and spends most of his time "at the gym" while she works.