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Which would you prefer?

  • Independent!

    Votes: 18 38.3%
  • Traditional!

    Votes: 29 61.7%
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
My last thread identified that we may all see traditional or independent women differently! :unsure:

What type of women do you say you prefer - if any? And by that how would you define a traditional or independent woman?
The stereotypes so far seem to range from kitchen appliances to man-haters 馃槄
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
My wife is my ideal combo. She comes from a male dominant segment of the Aussie culture and is good with the man running things. However, she is feisty and can handle domineering men who cross the line. She has an independent quirkiness which drew me to her.
There's a reason I omitted a "both" option on the poll, I want to see preferences lol

Which side of the fence do you lean most towards etc etc :p
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
On the previous thread it was noted that the traits of a traditional woman included being the rock for the man, nurturing and not comparing him to other men etc. At the same time I know I look at women who aren't financially independent a lot differently than a woman who is. So I voted independent.

Yet if that's what a traditional woman is like, then I guess I've missed out my whole life.
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
I've had a bit of dating experience over the years and that experience has made me treasure a more traditionally minded, feminine woman. I'd rather not have to worry about a woman that scoffs at the prospect of her cooking dinner. I don't want to worry that my wife might raise our kids to be LGBTQ just because she can earn clout online. No thanks. Gimme a Conservative, Trad-wife.
I'm thinking what is resonating in my thoughts right now is about respect when mentioned on the other thread. A traditional woman respects her husband as principle. An independent woman, demands that respect be earned.

Sometimes to earn that respect you will have to put the foot down. My mistake was tolerating a lot of crap, but what else can we do as men but weather their bullsh-t out of love? They are already guaranteed their crazy phases each month.

Meh, this is why I threw a wrench at the whole thing.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
I grew up in a very traditional home. My mom never worked, cooked dinner every day, cleaned, raised children. My dad worked and was in charge of bills and house maintenance.

I think the ideal is to keep a balance in between independent and traditional. It's not easy, but it's possible. I'm more traditional and I feel independent. Maybe it's because I don't feel emotionally dependent? I don't feel threatened if I have to change roles in order to keep my family happy.
From my experience most of my partners were both, all the independent women in my life cooked and cleaned for example. Makes me curious about preferences though.
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
..and when you DO put up with a lot of crap, they see it as a weakness, lose respect for you, and treat you accordingly. Take it from me, man, never be afraid to walk away or at least call someone out for poor behavior.

My wife was just raised in a very Conservative culture and while she feels she has to adapt a little, she still carries those values with her. She was raised to believe certain things were just her job and she takes great pride in that job. I was feeling pretty dead inside too and ready to just go be awful in the world but sometimes when you meet the right person, that changes. I got faith in you, man. I hope you find your happiness, whatever that is.
I've walked away from them, called them out, we just fight, and she makes up. Last one even though she starts the fight she complained that "it's always me trying to bring us back together" :rolleyes:
There's only one solution and it was the final one. Guess the relationship just had to run its course.

As for dating if I want to go back I know exactly what to do and which approach to take. Maybe one day I reach down and find something left to give after all, but it won't be much. I was already exhausted with a lot by the time I reached my last ex and I reached in as far as I could go.
 

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Discussion Starter · #30 ·
Oh so funny! What does this has to do with the question???

How boobs obsessed men are always so proud that they fancy boobs.
As if that makes you manly. No, it doesn't!

Yo mummy didn't breast feed you, little boy? That is why you are looking for a mummy (titts) and not a partner.
You still got the reflex of a baby to look out for boobs, since you haven't been breast fed until you were fed up with breast milk. That is why you kept that craving for boobs and develope an idee that big boobs mean a lot of food and will satisfy your hunger.

You know the bigger the boobs, the more used up and less functioning the ovaries are?

That is why we women get very large boobs once we go into menopause and beyond. Once we aren't fertile anymore.
So your instinct doesn't goes towards reproduction, rather towards sadisfying a premature urge you have since you were a baby and that never has been eased like it should by the age of 1 year...

A lot of women also don't like men obsessed witht their boobs. Makes them feel like the guy is a baby.

So I suggest from you mentioning boobs that you are for traditional (homely) women. One who is like a mother and maybe unlike your own mother always available to nurture your needs.
Hey now, you can't blame a man for subscribing to boob power! 馃槄

Cartoon Poster Thigh Fictional character Art


It's obvious where the power comes from!
 

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Discussion Starter · #71 ·
These seem like narrow, binary choices.

Is there not a happy medium?

Lots of women work but like having doors opened for them and like having a masculine guy around. Sure, I can handle a lot of things but that's because helplessness isn't a good idea. It doesn't mean a strong guy isn't a huge plus.

As for spiders...I don't need no man to kill spiders for me! But that's because I quite like spiders and have the spider relocation program in my house. They eat bugs and I appreciate that so they get swept onto a dustpan and relocated outside.

My bf would kill them though if I asked.
Of course, all the women in my life were mix of both but I wanted to see preferences. If I put a both option, majority would vote both.

Like my fav body part thread, most men would vote duh the whole package 馃槄

Now the poll results reveal that men lean more towards what they believe is traditional.

The definitions may vary, but it is quite enlightening now.
 

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Discussion Starter · #75 · (Edited)
One thing I noticed is if the cat is around she will ask the cat to kill spiders as well, but he鈥檚 also a guy. She鈥檒l go 鈥渓ook kitty, a spider! You鈥檙e supposed to kill anything that moves!鈥 So she also appreciates traditional roles for cats.
Lol my old floofy murdered anything that moved, birds included I guess she was very traditional 馃槅

If my daughter is around (and if floofy didn't murder it) she handles the huntman spiders for the household. She plays with them actually, she's true blue Aussie when it comes to this, it shames me because they freak me out too much I go for the kill route as my nerves aren't good enough to capture. You need to be fast, quick, accurate, and non reactive when the spider moves. I fail on the last part.

She enjoys watching everyone freak out and beg her to take the spider away lol, if you can picture two grown adults (me and ex wife) climbing on the sofa freaking out with a little girl coming towards us playing with a massive spider on her arms giggling at us... yeah 馃槚

But she's not around all the time, still remember with last ex a huntman spider showed up on my windshield to say hello, I was like ah hello, stay outside, maybe if I drive very fast you will disappear. Nope it already decided my car was to be it's new home and gave me frights randomly on the road.

When I picked up my ex I warned her, saying there's a huntsman crawling around, didn't want her to get scared. The second I said that, the spider went up to her seat window and said hi, and she freaked out 馃槄

Then we went to the car wash immediately, and hand washed everything. But we were both still jumpy from all the random scares. Then finally at the end of the day, we parked thinking it was all over, and she opened the door and the spider crawled into her side of the cabin. She screamed and climbed on top of me lol and we had to "evacuate" from the drivers seat. It was crawling all over the inside of the car so I had to spray and kill lol, what a day!
 

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Discussion Starter · #76 ·
I also wonder if it's because some men associate independent with ball busting career women who don't need no freaking mam.

If that's what they imagine I can understand why they don't want it. But that's not a lot of career women.
Its like stereotypes of traditional women as a kitchen appliances, we all have our associations based on our experiences 馃槉 it's interesting no?
 

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Discussion Starter · #89 · (Edited)
You are assuming that the Harpy has a real reason to nag or is just an insufferable hen who is never happy.

Mostly it's the second kind.
Unless a man can do everything that TikTok husbands and boyfriends do all around the world for their partners, regardless of what he does for her which are seen as mere "expectations", then he's not good enough 馃槄

It's not enough that you respond to me within the hour each day, when you F up even by 1 minute prepare to get nagged.
It's not enough that you listen attentively and get me whatever I want no matter the price, that's the bare minimum.
It's not enough that you spent the effort to wrap up the presents and got me multiples, the card was not handwritten.
It's not enough that you pick me up everyday, you need to show up to surprise me randomly and with gifts.
It's not enough that you take me wherever I need to go, you need to offer to do that for me without me asking.
It's not enough that you help out cooking and cleaning, you need to surprise me with a meal out of the blue.

I don't care about what you do for me when I ask, those are just my expectations. I don't care about what the late night runs to find pills for the period pain, any man would do that. That does not show me that you love me. It's all about initiative and effort, this is what boyfriend A does for his girlfriend, that is what boyfriend B does for his girlfriend without them asking. This is what I see from TikTok and what my friends boast to me about and expect for you to up them so I can boast back.

Guess I'm too childish to have a relationship! :LOL:
 

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Discussion Starter · #90 ·
Honestly looking back I still remember ex-wife switched to a more traditional mindset with our daughter, and it was my fault that I did not appreciate it. I still don't. I just lost respect for her.

I still have it hardwired in me to go for more independent women. If I was a different man maybe my love life could have been different. I probably wouldn't have divorced in the first place. But hey, just my experiences and thinking out loud.
 

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Discussion Starter · #105 ·
When I think of a traditional woman, I sure don't think of a woman who is adventurous in the bedroom, so I'm surprised to see most guys think that's what they want considering the prevailing sexual attitude on this forum. Being a traditional woman doesn't equate to doing anything you say sexually at all. If they have traditional old-fashioned ethics, it's likely they are not bent that way.

There has always been the old saying that men want a cook in the kitchen and a w***e in the bedroom, and I think that may be true for many men. Fortunately, some men now realize how boring an old-fashioned traditional woman can be, more like a mother taking care of them than anything else, which isn't sexy for either of them; but hey, if they're traditional and mild and have blinders on, then the man can do whatever he wants without her kicking up dust, can't he?
Considering I had two long term exs nag me for sex too I think I missed out on all this traditional loving! 馃槄

Maybe I could have been happier :unsure:
Oh well, will never know now, but nice to think about :giggle:
 
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