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Wonder if any of you will believe this is a problem. Before my H left, our sex life had diminished ALOT. Several reasons-he works pretty much everyday, very high stress this past year, I'm tired at night and he can't get up in the morning as he is so shattered. I'm better in the morning. Other problems, he doesn't share much and I think there was a lack of intimacy between us. The other reason is that my vagina is ridiculously small. I mean it takes ages for him to get it in and it hurts. Once in, generally ok. But it takes the passion out of it when you're trying not to wince. Last time I had a cervical exam the woman asked me if I'd ever had sex! (really tactful).

He's left now and it's been six weeks but I really want to sort my problem. I just want to have proper sex. This has also made me more inhibited and I don't initiate sex. Might be a stupid question but can a vagina shrink from lack of "use"?
 

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It's made of muscle. I always thought it was the other way around... the more contractions \ exercise it gets, the tighter it can be. That' sbeen my experience, anyways.
 

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are you lubed? if you are, why would it take ages to get in? you're vagina can't be as tight as your anus and people have anal sex, with a lot of lube. maybe try using a dildo the same size as your husband's penis just to practice getting it in there with lube.
 

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I believe arousal is a big part of the comfort. With my partner unless she is aroused penetration is painful to her. Artificial lube may allow me mechanically to slide in but it doesn't alleviate the pain. Getting her thoroughly aroused however causes her to self lubricate and feel no pain whatsoever, even with hard thrusting.
 

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My wife and I had the same problem till after her second childbirth. I mean tight is good, but having to be TOO careful gets to be a drag...

Sometimes you just want to NAIL it, and it is just too tight for it to be comfortable for her.......

I am sort of thick so that might have been some of the trouble.........

Now (year 47) it is just PERFECT!!!!!
 
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