Just stumbled on this website and thought it might be a good place to get some thoughts and opinions on my wife.
Some quick background: married for almost 10 years, no kids.
In the early stages of our marriage, both of us worked hard. Regardless of what job she had, she would find herself stressed out, often taking the stress out on me in the form of temper tantrums and blaming me for making her work.
As my career/business improved, we got to a stage where she no longer had to work. This was a relief to both of us as she would now be stress-free (from work) and I would no longer have to put up with her tempers and constantly blaming me for her having to work.
She has now not worked for about 2 years now. She sleeps in daily and spends her time cooking (which she loves) and doing basic chores around the house like laundry, ironing, etc.
The house is still very much a mess though as she doesn't seem to have much motivation in proactively doing anything that doesn't appear to be urgent. In fact, I find myself on weekends having to clean up parts of the house that have just gotten to be too much of a mess during the week while I'm away at work.
During her free time (which she has a lot of), she spends on facebook, twitter, playing ipad/iphone games, online shopping or going out for lunches with her friends.
With our extra income now, she has gotten herself luxury bags and watches, items which she has told me she deserves as a sign of my love for her.
She comes from a poor family whom she is very close to. Her brother's business is failing/bankrupt and she uses part of her monthly money/allowance I give her to give to her mother, who then uses it to pay for her brother's babysitter. She also regularly gives her parents and siblings cash gifts (guess where the money came from?) annually e.g. Christmas, usually ranging from several hundred to a thousand dollars or more.
If I display any indication of resentment about this (seriously, why is it my responsibility to support her brother's family?), she'll accuse me of being selfish or calculative when it comes to her family. She says as her husband, I should be generous to her family. I have never given my own family even half of what I've given to hers (directly or indirectly).
She is now pressuring me to buy a new house for us. She says she hates our current house. Doing this will put both us about $500k at least in debt. She gets upset if I tell her I need time to think about it. She says she wants a new house ASAP.
Wow, after writing all that out, it actually seems a lot worse than I thought. I wish I could say I was exaggerating, but I'm really not.
I have a feeling nobody here is going to think much of my wife after reading all that. I guess I put up with it because I do love her, although I have very often thought of leaving. Even though I love her, I think I'd be perfectly happy just living by myself.
We have other issues with our marriage, but I'll leave it at that for now. Please let me know what you think.
Some quick background: married for almost 10 years, no kids.
In the early stages of our marriage, both of us worked hard. Regardless of what job she had, she would find herself stressed out, often taking the stress out on me in the form of temper tantrums and blaming me for making her work.
As my career/business improved, we got to a stage where she no longer had to work. This was a relief to both of us as she would now be stress-free (from work) and I would no longer have to put up with her tempers and constantly blaming me for her having to work.
She has now not worked for about 2 years now. She sleeps in daily and spends her time cooking (which she loves) and doing basic chores around the house like laundry, ironing, etc.
The house is still very much a mess though as she doesn't seem to have much motivation in proactively doing anything that doesn't appear to be urgent. In fact, I find myself on weekends having to clean up parts of the house that have just gotten to be too much of a mess during the week while I'm away at work.
During her free time (which she has a lot of), she spends on facebook, twitter, playing ipad/iphone games, online shopping or going out for lunches with her friends.
With our extra income now, she has gotten herself luxury bags and watches, items which she has told me she deserves as a sign of my love for her.
She comes from a poor family whom she is very close to. Her brother's business is failing/bankrupt and she uses part of her monthly money/allowance I give her to give to her mother, who then uses it to pay for her brother's babysitter. She also regularly gives her parents and siblings cash gifts (guess where the money came from?) annually e.g. Christmas, usually ranging from several hundred to a thousand dollars or more.
If I display any indication of resentment about this (seriously, why is it my responsibility to support her brother's family?), she'll accuse me of being selfish or calculative when it comes to her family. She says as her husband, I should be generous to her family. I have never given my own family even half of what I've given to hers (directly or indirectly).
She is now pressuring me to buy a new house for us. She says she hates our current house. Doing this will put both us about $500k at least in debt. She gets upset if I tell her I need time to think about it. She says she wants a new house ASAP.
Wow, after writing all that out, it actually seems a lot worse than I thought. I wish I could say I was exaggerating, but I'm really not.
I have a feeling nobody here is going to think much of my wife after reading all that. I guess I put up with it because I do love her, although I have very often thought of leaving. Even though I love her, I think I'd be perfectly happy just living by myself.
We have other issues with our marriage, but I'll leave it at that for now. Please let me know what you think.
