[anewstart60]

An idiot ask me this on tinder. After texting me non stop n i didnt reply . cmon . i am a professional and he works as a low cost worker . said his wife passed n I just finally send him my regards . then ............he asked

Do you want a sleep ?

I ask what is a sleep ? Thinking he has bad English .

Then i figure out . he meant do you want a fuzk .

Wtf ?!!!!

Does sleep replace fuzk and it sounds more class ??? Wtf !!!!!!

I think I will take down my profile soon before they rub my photos on their **** . wtf !!!

I know this will get me flamed but .


Wow, you sure are full of yourself!

 

[anewstart60]

I'm pretty sure I can understand how this comes across to me. These may all be valid facts but you're "I'm too good for this guy" attitude is ****ty. People having success and money is fine but you don't have to put it in everyone's face that may not be as fortunate.
And I will continue to read whatever posts I like.

 

[anewstart60]

OOOOOOOK then!

 

[anewstart60]

I didn't crucify anybody, I told it like I saw it.
Her post that I commented on clearly states the guy was texting her non-stop and she wasn't responding because "cmon . i am a professional and he works as a low cost worker". She then talks about his wanting to fvck her after first making it seem like he obviously wasn't in her social class anyway. Had she left out the "cmon . i am a professional and he works as a low cost worker" comment placed at the beginning of her post it wouldn't look like it does.

And I'm not asking her to change the world and hopefully she finds whatever it is she's looking for but where I live this post of hers comes across as shallow.

And please keep in mind this is just my opinion, I have a right to state it.

 

[anewstart60]

I don't think there is anything wrong with that either, I just wouldn't be condescending about it.

 

[anewstart60]

It's nice to know I'm not the only one who sees it.

I'm going to get banned for this but so be it. Condescension is common place here you will come to find. TAM is a tight knit group and they are very attached to their beliefs. there is some good stuff here but a lot of BS holier than thou attitudes as well. I dont know how much you have read on this particular thread but you're hearing from (some) women who love attention from men and seek (so they say) friends with benefits relationships, no strings attached because their lives are too full and they're so sought after and busy they just dont know what they want or what will make them happy. Then they get mad because this friend with benefits doesn't treat them like a girlfriend. They end up chasing them, attaching strings and getting confused.

I have to say tripad from the little I've read is not into that....friends with benefits that is but her comment and attitude is shallow and would turn off most men so it's not just you.

 

[anewstart60]

Exactly!

No, his asking for a ****, if you understood him correctly was classless and distasteful. But you were already ignoring him prior because you felt he was beneath you due to his social standing and occupation. Your attitude about hoe and where people from your country learned English shows the same disdain and shallow outlook.

 

[anewstart60]

inarut
She clearly doesn't nor will she ever understand what we are saying, she also hasn't understood that you are a woman as you clearly stated.

Shallow ?

Be my guest , have a woman of similar tastelessness on your plate.

 

[anewstart60]

This is actually getting pretty funny.

 

[anewstart60]

This comment just enforces the fact that Tripad has no clue what was commented on.
Inarut and I both agree about the guy asking for a fvck like he did was wrong and a negative reaction from her was justified. All we commented on was her attitude that she was clearly better than this guy BEFORE he asked anything. She thinks she is better than others because she has more money and social standing, which is not the case.
She may be successful in business but as far as I have read she is not the good person she thinks she is based on income and social standing, she comes across as mean , materialistic,petty and shallow.She seems to be a perfect example that wealth and status do not make you a better person, she lacks the qualities that make a good person (compassion,humility,kindness)
I also believe finding someone in your social circle is the best match but you don't have to sh!t on someone you feel doesn't meet those standards.
Again I'll say there is nothing wrong with dating within your social circle and anyone with any relationship experience would probably agree that your odds of a successful relationship are probably better but being demeaning to someone you perceive as being lower is simply wrong.

At first I was going to chalk this up to her lack of english skills but she stated english is her first language (doesn't look like it to me though)

The above comments seemed to take offence at what I said about the d**khead rather than at the fact that he bluntly asked me if I want to f*** , after less than 10 one liner texts .:scratchhead:

I cant understand how is it that what I have said about the d***head is more offensive than what he had said to me .

Whatever . Unless my comment has hurt you in a sensitive area .

Please go on without me . especially Inarut and the other guy . I didnt bother to check out the name .

 

[anewstart60]

To quit beating a dead horse, I'm done with this subject but I do stand by all my posts on the matter.

 

[anewstart60]

I want someone to go to movies with, dinner, sporting events and maybe vacations. Don't want anyone who wants to move in or get married, but definitely want more than FWB. Which I had offered from someone I have known a long time, and actually have feelings for, so I didn't think that was a good plan.

Exactly how I feel!
I would think this would be a more prevalent feeling from women who have come out of long relationships.

 

[anewstart60]

RD, I love reading your posts but you're a bit of a drama queen. Date to have fun and if you do that then you win. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself to follow an impossible life plan that requires things you have no control of. I mean this with the utmost of respect, but if you were my little brother I'd kick you in the sack and tell you to stop whining, live your life the way it unfolds naturally, and enjoy the journey.

This!!!!!

 

[anewstart60]

Dude, it's your attitude. You project neediness, insecurity, depression, being controlling, and having impossible expectations when want to project being happy, fun/easy going, and centered. If you were to approach life thinking about all the good it's given you and use that to develop a positive attitude, women would be far more likely to be drawn to you. Happy people don't need to vent about life not giving them everything they want, instead they find joy in what they have, and that inevitably breeds more success.

One quick example for you:
Unhealthy attitude - I want a woman so I can live a complete, fulfilling, happy life.
Healthy attitude - I am living a complete, fulfilling, happy life and would enjoy having a similar someone share it with me.

See how these project different things despite the overall goal being similar? There are a lot of non-verbals that go with a healthy attitude that will radiate off you and make you more attractive to a potential partner.

He seems alot like my Ex Wife. He needs to be unhappy and doesn't know how or really want to be happy. Lives for the Drama!

 

[anewstart60]

On Sunday night, I texted him "Hi, It is Ne, wanna have sex?

He reply with YES, then gave me a list of his schedule.... I did not want to have sex. I was egotistical and mainly wanted to see if he would want to fvck me, while dating this other woman....

That kind of behavior is a failing I have. I need to be humble, and not sh!t test myself. I should not care if he is dating someone else and still wants to have sex with me. I also wanted to test him and he failed

I have not texted him back and will NOT.

My ego needed stroking, my ego needs to be put to sleep a little....


That's kinda Fvcked up!

 

[anewstart60]

So, I need to have a talk with Real Estate, and I'm not looking forward to it. I'm afraid he will take it wrong, but the only way I will know is if I have this conversation.

I need some space.

Not like in a bad way, "I'm not sure if this is what I want and I might break up with you" space. In an, "I love spending time with you, but I'm spending so much time with you that I never see my friends anymore and I don't have time to do my laundry and focus on things that are important to me, and I need a little more balance in my life" space. We spend every weekend together, regardless of whether or not we have actual specific plans... and an entire weekend is a LOT of hours to take out of my schedule. I work full-time, plus my commute, Mon-Fri. If I spend all weekend at his place, that only leaves me with Mon-Thurs evenings (3-4 hrs per night max) to do everything else that I need/want to do, like laundry, groceries, meal prepping, seeing my friends. I've had to resort to, "Hey, friend, I would love to hang out with you, but only if you come over and we drink wine while I do my laundry and clean my room." And all this time spent at his place on the weekends... if we don't have anything specific planned, we just hang out and watch TV/movies, which really isn't quality time.

I don't think he realizes just how much time that is for me to take out of my schedule. He has mastered the Tim Ferris 4-hour work week or whatever. Literally, he works at MOST 2-3 hrs a day... from home. So he doesn't have to deal with a commute, or even showering, if he doesn't want to. He can work in his pajamas, if he wants to. It isn't like he's hurting for extra time the way that I am, so I think it just hasn't occurred to him.

So I'm going to have to say that I can only spend one weekend day... or I'm only coming over if we have definite plans to do something. Something like that. I have plans and goals that I want to work on, like writing my novel (finally), among other things. He is very supportive of these, but I need TIME to accomplish them... and he's being a huge time suck right now, and the time we're spending together isn't always quality time, and if it's not quality time, it's not a good use of my time.

I get exactly what you mean. I have been seeing a great lady for the last 10 months and we usually spend Saturday till Sunday afternoon together. Other than that we talk daily. We both have grown kids at home while they attend university and we both realize we need to spend as much time with them as we can till they leave home. Luckily we have discussed this a few times and it is not an issue for either of us, we will let things evolve and spend more time together as things go on.
I do enjoy the time I get at home alone when my son is at his mothers too and I'm nowhere near ready to give that independance up just yet. But we both enjoy our independance so it works well for us.

 

[anewstart60]

You need time for your kids. I need time for my creative pursuits. It's a big part of what makes me ME. (Some people would call them hobbies, which I think belittles these pursuits, but...) These pursuits require a decent amount of solitary time, which I am ok with, because I am an introvert. I like having an excuse to stay home! But seriously, they do require a significant amount of alone time... but I also need to prioritize managing my life. I have a job, I need to eat (grocery shopping and food prep), I need to do laundry and conduct basic self-care (I need to look professional at work), and other life-maintenance stuff. I need to prioritize and do that before I can do the creative pursuits... and right now, all my free time is going towards 1) the life maintenance stuff and 2) Real Estate. There's nothing left for ME.

After a couple years alone (with my son) getting to know myself I feel I am not even close to letting that freedom go. It's nice to be able to work on my photography or watch a movie, go for a walk by myself or just hang out with myself.
With my girlfriend I feel like I have the best of both worlds. I have time at my place with and without my son and I have the time her and I have together. Luckily she feels the same way so far. I told her if it became stressful being with her in any way I would walk away, she gets it and so far no stress.