This is so sad. I would imagine that the pain would be compounded by society's stereotype about men wanting it all the time. Must have made you feel awful.I didn't hide it, but when I tried to talk about this with my XH, the rejection continued. He said we would improve, but he never did anything about it. He said that all I wanted was sex, and didn't I value him for other things? And when I tried to initiate, he constantly rejected me.
So I stopped asking, and I stopped initiating. Because withdrawing was far less painful than the constant rejection.
I think my experience is pretty common.
You did not hide it, it was out in the open. You are strong to take the risk and be open about it with your XH.