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Incase you wonder , he definitely finds me attractive and he is definitely not as attractive as I would have gone for in my younger days when I had a wider selection 😅
 

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I'm going to give you a different take in Tinder. I am not cut out for online dating but if I had to choose an app, I would choose Tinder.

I experimented with online dating in 2019 and tried Match (21 days), e harmony ( <2 weeks), hinge (9 days) and bumble (2 days). I tried Tinder in late 2020 for 2 weeks.

I had the worst luck on Hinge.

E harmony was just as everyone else has described.

Match was full of guys claiming to want a relationship but who were really looking for nsa sex (I could write a book). I did meet my first "boyfriend" post divorce on Match but that's a sad story in and of itself.

I didn't like Bumble (way too many polished profiles with professional pics. Spidey senses screaming fake profiles) so didn't give it more than a glance.

I had the best luck on Tinder. Found more men there who shared my values and relationship goals than on the other apps combined. I think it's the sheer volume of profiles - numbers game for sure.

I would not give up on Tinder but maybe give a different app a try based on what's popular in your area.
Very interesting that you have had the most success with Tinder. Just curious...perhaps I set up my profile incorrectly....did you not find couples looking for someone to join them, married men looking for hook-ups, men with girlfriends who were looking for an extra friend, or men just wanting FWB relationships? That was my experience. I was thankful that these men were honest in what they were seeking but it also turned my stomach at the same time.
 

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I doubt I would refuse to date someone who was cheated on — not that I meet many in my age group who have been — since I know too well what that’s like. But I prefer casual dating and am not interested in a relationship and maybe I would feel differently about that if I did. And I don’t use dating apps. A field of bleating sheep doesn’t appeal to me. If I don’t run across someone in real life to date I’m not interested. Yes, that can take awhile but I find the thought of dating apps weird — like the old newspaper ads from my day that I thought were weird then.
Tell us how you meet a potential date. Are you in any groups or classes? You go places where there are singles? I would much rather meet people in person but I am not going to hang out at some club, don't want to meet someone who likes to drink for pleasure in his off time. When I go out to eat I do sit at the bar instead of a table and I have had a few men approach me....had one guy pull up his chair right next to me one time and with little conversation that would have lead him to ask, he asks me if I would like to go find a hotel.....lol!!!!! I just laughed and told him no thanks and I can only imagine the look on my face!!! That was bizarre! Had another over weight, older bald man that kept trying to get my eye and I could see his actions out of the corner of my eye. I made no eye contact and we did not engage in conversation. When I went to pay my bill he had paid for my dinner without me knowing before he left the restaurant. I felt bad that I had ignored the guy. That was especially kind of him.
 

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Very interesting that you have had the most success with Tinder. Just curious...perhaps I set up my profile incorrectly....did you not find couples looking for someone to join them, married men looking for hook-ups, men with girlfriends who were looking for an extra friend, or men just wanting FWB relationships? That was my experience. I was thankful that these men were honest in what they were seeking but it also turned my stomach at the same time.
Those things you mentioned were not exclusive to tinder. I ran into all of the above on every dating app I tried at about the same rate.

The benefit of using Tinder is volume. So as an example, I may have only 10 potential profile matches on match.com or hinge, but I had hundreds of potential matches on tinder. Assuming 10% of those were men with whom I shared common values and relationship goals, that's one potential profile match on match.com or hinge, but 10 or more profiles on Tinder. Does that make sense?

I also found the men on Tinder to be way more honest about what they were looking for and what they wanted then on any other dating app I used. I didn't waste half as much time trying to get to the truth.
 

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Tell us how you meet a potential date. Are you in any groups or classes? You go places where there are singles? I would much rather meet people in person but I am not going to hang out at some club, don't want to meet someone who likes to drink for pleasure in his off time. When I go out to eat I do sit at the bar instead of a table and I have had a few men approach me....had one guy pull up his chair right next to me one time and with little conversation that would have lead him to ask, he asks me if I would like to go find a hotel.....lol!!!!! I just laughed and told him no thanks and I can only imagine the look on my face!!! That was bizarre! Had another over weight, older bald man that kept trying to get my eye and I could see his actions out of the corner of my eye. I made no eye contact and we did not engage in conversation. When I went to pay my bill he had paid for my dinner without me knowing before he left the restaurant. I felt bad that I had ignored the guy. That was especially kind of him.
I live in a very large metro area with lots to do. Meet-ups, unmarried neighbors, church, community events, friends, hobbies. I have occasionally done classes. I have no interest in clubs or bars or single/mingle places. There’s no appeal to me in a “forever” relationship again — or anything close to it — so it doesn’t matter how long it is between meeting men. That’s not a priority. I just continue on with my life and if I meet someone to date for awhile, great. If not, also great. My very casual way wouldn’t work for anyone who is seriously looking but I’m not so, for me, it works well.
 

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I live in a very large metro area with lots to do. Meet-ups, unmarried neighbors, church, community events, friends, hobbies. I have occasionally done classes. I have no interest in clubs or bars or single/mingle places. There’s no appeal to me in a “forever” relationship again — or anything close to it — so it doesn’t matter how long it is between meeting men. That’s not a priority. I just continue on with my life and if I meet someone to date for awhile, great. If not, also great. My very casual way wouldn’t work for anyone who is seriously looking but I’m not so, for me, it works well.

I think you should get pretty good dates . Most of the guys seem to work that way .

I wish I can work the same way - imagine all the sex I can get ( assuming the guys are good 😆 )

Sigh , I know I can’t work that way because when it ends or if the guys turn out be asses , I will be heart broken .
 

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I think you should get pretty good dates . Most of the guys seem to work that way .

I wish I can work the same way - imagine all the sex I can get ( assuming the guys are good 😆 )

Sigh , I know I can’t work that way because when it ends or if the guys turn out be asses , I will be heart broken .
Chick, don't be discouraged. You know what you want, that's half the battle. It's up to you to stick to your guns and be ruthless in eliminating men who don't match you, regardless of their reasons.

You don't need to be an ass about it, but just like men don't owe women a relationship, women don't owe men sex. It's simply a matter of running through the bros until you find that one man who wants similar things who does it for you mentally, physically and emotionally.

Don't waste time on wishy-washy half-assers, gamer-players or duds. Yes, there's lots of dross out there, but how else can you appreciate your golden nugget when you find him? And you will if you keep putting yourself out there.
 

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I live in a very large metro area with lots to do. Meet-ups, unmarried neighbors, church, community events, friends, hobbies. I have occasionally done classes. I have no interest in clubs or bars or single/mingle places. There’s no appeal to me in a “forever” relationship again — or anything close to it — so it doesn’t matter how long it is between meeting men. That’s not a priority. I just continue on with my life and if I meet someone to date for awhile, great. If not, also great. My very casual way wouldn’t work for anyone who is seriously looking but I’m not so, for me, it works well.
yeah, I am not looking for any long term relationship either. Omiting those that do on bumble:)
 

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I was going to post this update last weekend but decided to wait until my first "gig".

Pre covid I met a woman at a singles social event I attended. She and I hit it off and became fast friends but we drifted apart when the covid lockdown happened. She went into full blown shelter in place until recently. She called about a month ago to catch up and told me that she used her Sheltering time to start a new business -Matchmaking services. Why is that important? Because she hired me to be her social coordinator 😁. I am now getting paid to do what I've been doing for free my entire adult life...... organizing social events and making sure everyone enjoys themselves. I didn't organize the one yesterday but she asked me to help get people to talk to each other. It was lots of fun. I will be happy to hear if there were any matches.
 

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Very interesting that you have had the most success with Tinder. Just curious...perhaps I set up my profile incorrectly....did you not find couples looking for someone to join them, married men looking for hook-ups, men with girlfriends who were looking for an extra friend, or men just wanting FWB relationships? That was my experience. I was thankful that these men were honest in what they were seeking but it also turned my stomach at the same time.
My profile was fairly detail and uncompromising about what I wanted. I STILL got weirdos, so it's not you. They simply see someone ****able and take a shot. Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right? I had some interesting, rather tempting offers from some tasty little treats:p if I was of that mindset.

How detailed are you ladies on your profiles? Mine was rather straightforward but clear and detailed. Similarly, I went right past any skimpy profiles, regardless of how hot the dude was.

Those things you mentioned were not exclusive to tinder. I ran into all of the above on every dating app I tried at about the same rate.

The benefit of using Tinder is volume. So as an example, I may have only 10 potential profile matches on match.com or hinge, but I had hundreds of potential matches on tinder. Assuming 10% of those were men with whom I shared common values and relationship goals, that's one potential profile match on match.com or hinge, but 10 or more profiles on Tinder. Does that make sense?

I also found the men on Tinder to be way more honest about what they were looking for and what they wanted then on any other dating app I used. I didn't waste half as much time trying to get to the truth.
That's an intriguing take, Lila. I definitely appreciate the numbers advantage. I simply couldn't make myself try Tinder b/c of it's icky reputation :D .

Maybe if I find myself single again, I'll check it out. Things have been really great with my bf though, no complaints.
 

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I was told as a man if you achieve the four 6s you are irresistible to women. I am still trying to get the 6 pack abs. My wife’s review, “I can feel them under there.” Ouch...
 

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I was told as a man if you achieve the four 6s you are irresistible to women. I am still trying to get the 6 pack abs. My wife’s review, “I can feel them under there.” Ouch...
It depends on what the woman in question is looking for. Abs are pretty if all you want is an eyeful. Even if all a woman wants is casual, abs certainly don't guarantee stamina or a great lay ;).
 

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It depends on what the woman in question is looking for. Abs are pretty if all you want is an eyeful. Even if all a woman wants is casual, abs certainly don't guarantee stamina or a great lay ;).
Don’t ruin my dream TX it is going to be amazing, haha. Being around athletes all the time I already have some of my lines picked out.

Me: Are we in Ohio?
Mrs: uh no... what?
Me: <takes shirt off and flexes> oh coz I thought we were at a gun show

Me: Hey honey do we have any band aids?
Mrs: yea, why what happened?
Me: <takes shirt off and flexes> I can’t be sure but I think I’m cut

etc...
 
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