A question that I wonder about is if the OP also goes to therapy or does he just allow his wife to go at this alone? While he may not be invited to join a mostly one-on-one session format, he very well could ask to see the same therapist for some one-on-one work. At a minimum this would give the therapist a broader perspective and may help to identify some dynamics that need to be addressed.I agree, but she is in therapy. It can take a long time, so it's really up to the OP to decide how long he is going to "allow" this situation to last. From what he is saying, I get the feeling he is dismissing his wife's issues. I certainly dismissed my wife's. We don't really know the extent of the OP's wife issues. Having been through all this, I would say it's not easy to be in such a situation and it will be difficult to leave a vulnerable person. That said, you only live once and I would encourage the OP to take all the necessary steps if his life turns into hell.