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16 Posts
I'm in a marriage that has been unraveling for a long time. I will avoid the whole long story. The bottom line is I still love my wife and I believe in some messed up way, my wife still loves me.
Counseling is not an option as my wife won't go. I can't discusss anything either with her. She gets immediately defensive and the conversation never ever is meaningful or fruitful.
Despite all this, I can't seem to gather the courage to leave. Leaving means, I give up my life as it is. No more home, no more hopes and dreams of having a family with my wife, I will have to pay exorbitant attorney's fees and surely will pay some kind of alimony to my wife who has not worked (her choice over my objection) for 6 years. She quit her job as soon as we got married (a unilateral decision which I had no input about). We do not have kids. I'm a professional and so is she. She merely quit her job after we were married because she said she didn't like her job and I could afford to pay for everything. So, I work (my regular job and a side job) and she stays home doing whatever she likes.
All objective signs point to the fact that I should leave. If I had a friend in my position I'd tell him to get out. I know this relationship is not good nor has it ever truly been good. I guess, I've always been hoping things would get better. Always hoping to no avail. In fact, they have only gotten worse because I've chosen to confront her with my concerns about her not working and her controlling nature. My wife doesn't take criticism well and gets defensive and nasty.
The thing is, I can't seem to gather the courage to leave. To tell her that it is truly over. What is wrong with me!!??? At work, I'm an aggressive leader. I'm home, I'm nothing.
I'm writing to the universe for some words of widsom, encouragement, anything. I feel like someone is kicking me in the stomach every minute of every day. Help.
Counseling is not an option as my wife won't go. I can't discusss anything either with her. She gets immediately defensive and the conversation never ever is meaningful or fruitful.
Despite all this, I can't seem to gather the courage to leave. Leaving means, I give up my life as it is. No more home, no more hopes and dreams of having a family with my wife, I will have to pay exorbitant attorney's fees and surely will pay some kind of alimony to my wife who has not worked (her choice over my objection) for 6 years. She quit her job as soon as we got married (a unilateral decision which I had no input about). We do not have kids. I'm a professional and so is she. She merely quit her job after we were married because she said she didn't like her job and I could afford to pay for everything. So, I work (my regular job and a side job) and she stays home doing whatever she likes.
All objective signs point to the fact that I should leave. If I had a friend in my position I'd tell him to get out. I know this relationship is not good nor has it ever truly been good. I guess, I've always been hoping things would get better. Always hoping to no avail. In fact, they have only gotten worse because I've chosen to confront her with my concerns about her not working and her controlling nature. My wife doesn't take criticism well and gets defensive and nasty.
The thing is, I can't seem to gather the courage to leave. To tell her that it is truly over. What is wrong with me!!??? At work, I'm an aggressive leader. I'm home, I'm nothing.
I'm writing to the universe for some words of widsom, encouragement, anything. I feel like someone is kicking me in the stomach every minute of every day. Help.