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Its sad to say but the day has come where Im not sure if I trust my husband with the babysitter. As a Social Studies high school teacher I have many connections with students within the school. I figured it would be good to have a student I admired work for me outside of school hours. It went well! Great girl, but now shes graduated and Im afraid to call her back. It keeps playing in my head that although shes nice, shes also very cute and athletic ( & may I mention , of legal age now ). I dont know her motives at all and im surely over thinking this, but what are the chances that my husband could actually take a 1 day/night chance with this young girl? What if it has already happened. No more students babysitting for me... this is yoo stressful.

To elaborate: My marriage is good, however, he does work a fair amount as do I amd 3 children * 2 boys and 1 girl * ages 7 and under - dont exactly help the romance aspect. My worst fear is that he will take his 1 opportunity with a young girl someday. I am overthinking, But is a young 18 year old babysitter really just asking for trouble?
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Please excuse my poor grammar, Im on a cell phone. Although, I highly doubt anyone cares.
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Its sad to say but the day has come where Im not sure if I trust my husband with the babysitter. As a Social Studies high school teacher I have many connections with students within the school. I figured it would be good to have a student I admired work for me outside of school hours. It went well! Great girl, but now shes graduated and Im afraid to call her back. It keeps playing in my head that although shes nice, shes also very cute and athletic ( & may I mention , of legal age now ). I dont know her motives at all and im surely over thinking this, but what are the chances that my husband could actually take a 1 day/night chance with this young girl? What if it has already happened. No more students babysitting for me... this is yoo stressful.

To elaborate: My marriage is good, however, he does work a fair amount as do I amd 3 children * 2 boys and 1 girl * ages 7 and under - dont exactly help the romance aspect. My worst fear is that he will take his 1 opportunity with a young girl someday. I am overthinking, But is a young 18 year old babysitter really just asking for trouble?
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No. A young babysitter is not asking for trouble. If you're husband is going to cheat, he'll find a way/find a person.

I'm assuming this woman drives, so why would he ever have to be alone with her anyway? She'd be with your kids, not your husband.
 

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Although I agree with SecondTime that if he's going to cheat, he will find a way...I think if you are worried about it, then don't hire her. Look for an older woman who babysits or someone who you feel comfortable with and who you would trust your children with. There are certainly a lot of people who babysit and who you could interview and get references from.
 

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How old is your husband? I'm 31 and 18 year olds look like children to me. If he can't see the poor choice that bedding a barely legal would be, I doubt you can trust him with anything.

Fix the lack of connection between you two by reprioritizing it in your lives. Perhaps then you could relax somewhat about the babysitter.


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Our babysitter is a cute young student. As said before (Rich84)...She's a little girl!!! If my H would have sexual interest in her I'd WANT to know! I'd want to know that my H is a pervert!

We live in a sad culture that over-sexualizes children...that doesn't make all men perverts. I hope :confused:
 

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Does he ever do things like give her a drive home? Or hang around her when she's in your home?
 

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Our babysitter is a cute young student. As said before (Rich84)...She's a little girl!!! If my H would have sexual interest in her I'd WANT to know! I'd want to know that my H is a pervert!

We live in a sad culture that over-sexualizes children...that doesn't make all men perverts. I hope :confused:
Finding a 18 y/o woman attractive does not make a man a pervert. She's physically fully developed. It's not smart to go after one; but you're burring your head in the sand if you don't think most men find them physically attractive.
 

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I know EXACTLY what you are going through right now. I can't hire ANY males to do ANY work at my house. Because...you know...a male worker is MALE and my wife is a FEMALE. What if she has sexual relations with one of them? I have ZERO evidence she would. But you NEVER KNOW!

I'm with you girl. I'm locking down the house.

And THANK GOD we have so many experts here that didn't take your over the top paranoia lightly. You would be CRAZY to let this go when you have ZERO evidence that anything is going on. Sad to say a 31 year old man COULD find an 18 year old hottie hot: ICK!!!

Did I enter some parallel universe where everyone agrees that a woman must keep her husband away from all 18 year old girls PURELY because they are 18?

And in this parallel universe a 31 year old man is a perv for finding a fully grown, mature, and LEGAL 18 year old attractive?

When he didn't even do anything?

Am I missing something here? Why aren't we sending this woman to the looney bin? Why are we feeding her paranoia AT ALL?
 

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Finding a 18 y/o woman attractive does not make a man a pervert. She's physically fully developed. It's not smart to go after one; but you're burring your head in the sand if you don't think most men find them physically attractive.
I agree with this... but the rest solely depends on the character of your husband..do you have reason to believe he'd take any opportunity he could (if he wasn't caught) to feel a hot woman up ??


@Brazil0916 ....Also I couldn't help but notice your words...
My marriage is good, however, he does work a fair amount as do I and 3 children * 2 boys and 1 girl * ages 7 and under - dont exactly help the romance aspect. My worst fear is that he will take his 1 opportunity with a young girl someday. I am overthinking, But is a young 18 year old babysitter really just asking for trouble?
Almost sounds like you have resigned the fact.... "Oh I'm a Mother now, things aren't what they used to be... he works a lot...we don't have time...so many kids - like it's all boring & he shouldn't expect much excitement anymore".. Who [email protected]#.. your kids don't have to slow the romance & passion down.. it's not true !! ...

You have the power to keep things adventurous & hot in the bedroom.. then when he's at work, you're at work.. you'll both be grinning thinking of being in each other's arms later... tap into this.... put your energies into spicing up your marriage...over worrying how he is looking at the babysitter..

Some books can help...

Passionista: The Empowered Woman's Guide to Pleasuring a Man (Kerner):Books

101 Nights of Great Sex: Sealed Secrets. Anticipation. Seduction

Red-Hot Monogamy
 

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Has this babysitter done anything to make you believe she would take interest in your husband??

It is not a good idea to distrust your husband BEFORE distrusting your babysitter.

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I think there are plenty of 18 year old girls that lots of men would find attractive. Lots that don't, and look like the kids they are. Either way, a decent man at 31 is not interested in an 18 year old. That's just stupid.
If you think your husband is the kind of character that would try to seduce an 18 year old kid, why are you married to him. You've typed no reason for your mistrust in either of them. However, in some cases I think this fear may be justified by subtle observations. What observations have you noticed that are causing this fear? We aren't giving you a hard time--- you just haven't explained the motive for your fears very well.
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Its sad to say but the day has come where Im not sure if I trust my husband with the babysitter. As a Social Studies high school teacher I have many connections with students within the school. I figured it would be good to have a student I admired work for me outside of school hours. It went well! Great girl, but now shes graduated and Im afraid to call her back. It keeps playing in my head that although shes nice, shes also very cute and athletic ( & may I mention , of legal age now ). I dont know her motives at all and im surely over thinking this, but what are the chances that my husband could actually take a 1 day/night chance with this young girl? What if it has already happened. No more students babysitting for me... this is yoo stressful.

To elaborate: My marriage is good, however, he does work a fair amount as do I amd 3 children * 2 boys and 1 girl * ages 7 and under - dont exactly help the romance aspect. My worst fear is that he will take his 1 opportunity with a young girl someday. I am overthinking, But is a young 18 year old babysitter really just asking for trouble?
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You've firmly stated that you and your husband are both secondary school teachers.

Having said that, exactly what rationale are you using in determining as to why your husband would be any more attuned to messing around with some voluptuous female student, much less a babysitter, than you, yourself, would be in messing around with say, some young "ripped" male/student "stud muffin?"

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