Observe.
MC and IC.
MC and IC.
Sorry MrLsick for what you are going through because I know it is scary and painful.I am not saying what she did was right, I am just saying if she was happy she would have never talked to the OM.
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MC tomorrow will be our 5th week., I will try IC. Thanks.Observe.
MC and IC.
I have thought about the VAR and keylogger. It will happen soon!Face this crap head on. I suggest you do the research and find out as much as you can obout OM.
I also suggest you plant some VAR (voice activated recorders) and even some hidden cams. My thinking here is that if you are more in the "know" ......have the tools to keep track of things around the house and know who the OM is it may help you.
I think the unkown is killing you so get educated and take the steps to give you some piece of mind. Who knows, the things you find out may give you the validation that you need to take the next step.
Knowledge is power.
Have you exposed this to her family? Exposure helps make the affair inconvienent and uncomfortable to continue or start back up.
The OM may even have a GF back home and you could expose the affair that way also....even OM family should be exposed. Exposure is also a consequences that your WW should face. Having an extra set of eyes on your wife by exposing the affair may also give you piece of mind.
These affairs are addicting so you still have your work cut out for you by taking the step to prevent the affair to start up again.
Have you asked your wife what she is doing as an individual to affair proof her marriage? The NC helps but she needs to take the step as an individual to understand why she has this behavior and learn the tools to prevent it again.
Handling a bad marriage or dealing with ones unhappiness by behaving with deciet and lies is unhealthy. Your old lady needs help with that, and being the best husband in the world won't fix her issues she has about her self.
I'm thinking once you get the information about who the OM is you might find the levage to get him out of town....especially if everyone knows he is after a married women. So do a back round check and see if you can get the goods on OM .....he might find that its is not worth the effort to screw with you if you find some dirt on him.
I also suggest you contact his wife or ex wife and ask her for her support for your marriage and see if she can bring more light to who this guy is and what he is all about. The information you get from OMxW might help your cause in running this guy out of town.
Again knowledge is power, know your enemy!
Yes, she did try to tell me she wasnt happy, I just didnt understand what she was looking for. With MC I can see where I went wrong. NO, I do not agree, no matter how bad it was she should have never went into a EA. I have told her, maybe I was only 40/60 of our marriage, but you are 100% at fault for the EA.Sorry MrLsick for what you are going through because I know it is scary and painful.
I would like to say that even if is only an EA (emotional affair), this is not something that you did that brought her to begin an EA with another man outside of your marriage. Did she give you any indications that she was unhappy before the EA started? She may not have been happy but that does not give any spouse the right to begin an EA.
The evidence you described of her coming out of the house with the OM, sounds pretty bad. Are you absolutely sure the affair did not go physical?
For the most part you will find excellent advice here. I have found it very useful and helpful for myself
Yep trust but verify for now 2 vars in the house 1 var in the car hope you find nothing.Yes, she did try to tell me she wasnt happy, I just didnt understand what she was looking for. With MC I can see where I went wrong. NO, I do not agree, no matter how bad it was she should have never went into a EA. I have told her, maybe I was only 40/60 of our marriage, but you are 100% at fault for the EA.
And no, I am not sure it didnt go to PA, I really dont.
Hidden cams would be a felony/misdemeanor. so that is a no go there. Var's on the other hand go for it. Remember this isn't about the OM, it is about getting your wife back in the marriage. The OM is just some guy really. It wouldn't matter if he was your best friend or your worst enemy. Cheating is cheating and your wife is doing that. She is walking all over your marriage, its boundaries, and your trust.Face this crap head on. I suggest you do the research and find out as much as you can obout OM.
I also suggest you plant some VAR (voice activated recorders) and even some hidden cams. My thinking here is that if you are more in the "know" ......have the tools to keep track of things around the house and know who the OM is it may help you.
I think the unkown is killing you so get educated and take the steps to give you some piece of mind. Who knows, the things you find out may give you the validation that you need to take the next step.
Knowledge is power.
Have you exposed this to her family? Exposure helps make the affair inconvienent and uncomfortable to continue or start back up.
The OM may even have a GF back home and you could expose the affair that way also....even OM family should be exposed. Exposure is also a consequences that your WW should face. Having an extra set of eyes on your wife by exposing the affair may also give you piece of mind.
These affairs are addicting so you still have your work cut out for you by taking the step to prevent the affair to start up again.
Have you asked your wife what she is doing as an individual to affair proof her marriage? The NC helps but she needs to take the step as an individual to understand why she has this behavior and learn the tools to prevent it again.
Handling a bad marriage or dealing with ones unhappiness by behaving with deciet and lies is unhealthy. Your old lady needs help with that, and being the best husband in the world won't fix her issues she has about her self.
I'm thinking once you get the information about who the OM is you might find the levage to get him out of town....especially if everyone knows he is after a married women. So do a back round check and see if you can get the goods on OM .....he might find that its is not worth the effort to screw with you if you find some dirt on him.
I also suggest you contact his wife or ex wife and ask her for her support for your marriage and see if she can bring more light to who this guy is and what he is all about. The information you get from OMxW might help your cause in running this guy out of town.
Again knowledge is power, know your enemy!