[turnera]

I would tell her that you and she are going to marriage counseling. When you get there, discuss the issue. Let a professional guide you.

 

[turnera]

Women have a lot of issues when it comes to old husbands, sons, and new husbands. Be supportive of her, but show her the logic of the situation. This can't continue the way it is.

Frankly, I think her son needs counseling more than you two.

At the least, you need some tough love in the house on what's acceptable behavior. Of ANYONE - not just aimed at her son, but what ANYONE should be expected to behave like.