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Just realized my STBXW might have been having an affair. Pretty good chance actually.

But for some reason, if true that is, it might even come as a relief because in some twisted way, it might validate our upcoming divorce (which was due to different reasons).

Also, the fact that she may have someone to be with rather than by herself helps to alleviate any guilt I may have.

I'm not even interested in digging deeper anymore. I just want it to be over.

Is this a sick way of looking at it?
 

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Same here, I suspect STBXH is having an affair, or at least wouldn't be surprised if I found out. I don't care either, because if anything, that means he'll be less clingy with me and let me out easier. So far the divorce process has been really easy, and he didn't throw a fit or beg or anything when I said I wanted out, so it's either an affair or he doesn't care either.
 

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I feel the same way, the more sh-t she does, the easier it is for me to convince myself to let go and move on. It's hard at the moment for me though, my STBX isn't able to let me go yet, wants to change etc etc.
 

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I suspect that many marriages are killed by undetected affairs of one kind or another.

I think what is so very unfair beyond the unfaithfulness itself is that the WS allows the other spouse to think there was something wrong with them. That is perhaps the worst indignity of all.

There are better times ahead.
 

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Dont think that STBXW is having an affair.... but would not be surprised based on the fact she is lying to me now. And her spending and partying is outa control.
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I suspect that many marriages are killed by undetected affairs of one kind or another.

I think what is so very unfair beyond the unfaithfulness itself is that the WS allows the other spouse to think there was something wrong with them. That is perhaps the worst indignity of all.

There are better times ahead.
This. No one should have to spend a lifetime with someone who would let the person he/she promised to love for the rest of their lives to go through this immense pain and self-blame.
 
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