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Staying in love without sex/intimacy?

1668 Views 7 Replies 7 Participants Last post by  45188
Is it possible? I don't think it is. I'm in a sexless marriage and I know I'm not in love with him any more and since we are never intimate I don't see how I can get that feeling back.

In a 'normal' sex filled relationship, if you have little arguements you eventually have sex and everything is forgotten/forgiven, but if you are not having sex I think all the little things start accumulating into resentments that eventually lead to thoughts of wanting out.

Just thinking out loud..thoughts?
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Sex = Intimacy for me...
Intimacy is food for love...
No food and the love starves...
Then dies....
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Some folks can be deeply in love without sex. I don't think it's at all possible to be "in love" without intimacy.
I love my wife in fact I'm "in-love" with her in my sexless marriage.

I will always feel that way and that is what makes it hard to handle.
I know she loves me too but for whatever reason we ended up in a sexless marriage... its ok because i feel it is temporary and that on the other side is better intimacy.

That being said if we don't resolve this in four years I will divorce her...even though I love her. Partly so we both have a chance a truly being happy again. I'm a realist.

I can't function fully in a sexless marriage. At some point I need my brain back not thinking about it. It really is an unlivable permanent situation regardless of Love or not.
Well said WW..sometimes I think I have more male tendencies then female regarding everything to do with sex! lol
Have you talked about this subject with your H? Was it this way even early on? Any way to reconnect with the feelings of old (assuming it was not that way always)?

Go see a MC?

IMHO it is very hard to sustain this type of relationship for we are all human......just wait until someone of the opposite sex catches the eye of one of you.......just go read the infidelity forum on how this happens WAY MORE than I ever realized.

My gut tells me these types of sexless relationships are very dangerous for EAs and PAs to happen.
Not just EA's and PA's... but hoping you will meet a "replacement" soon fills your thoughts. Motivation for dumping them.

Yeah, some of us don't want to live alone forever, or be single again. Dating before the separation even occurs. Shopping around. I have a feeling that happens more often than just wanting "sex". At least for women, anyways. Or maybe just me :)
I don't see that as possible long term. I think it will wither and die within a few years.
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