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I agree and disagree. It was definitely passive aggressive on my part. She is free to react anyway she wanted. I had to prove a point and my other attempts and methods were apparently not effective.
Don't sweat it. You did what you had to do to get the point across, period. I would have don't the same thing in your shoes. I wouldn't have care if it was passive-aggressive or not.
 

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I agree and disagree. It was definitely passive aggressive on my part. She is free to react anyway she wanted. I had to prove a point and my other attempts and methods were apparently not effective.
I would have just dumped her instead of leading on someone else but that's just me lol

Some things are just throw away material, if she's flirting with other guys in front of me and refuses to see that as disrespect that qualifies. Hopefully she learnt her lesson, you are more tolerant than I.
 

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Don't sweat it. You did what you had to do to get the point across, period. I would have don't the same thing in your shoes. I wouldn't have care if it was passive-aggressive or not.
It’s almost like I no longer have time to tolerate the BS. I’ve learned so much from my prior failed marriages. I see things pretty clearly now and react. Can’t be passive about these things.

My point being it supports your theory when a woman sees that you are attractive to other women. It’s like something goes off in their brain and they go into survival mode to keep what they have.
 

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I would have just dumped her instead of leading on someone else but that's just me lol

Some things are just throw away material, if she's flirting with other guys in front of me and refuses to see that as disrespect that qualifies. Hopefully she learnt her lesson, you are more tolerant than I.
I hear you and what you’re saying. However, we’ve been together for two years and what she did didn’t cross any red line for me. In the past, she’s been good about correcting things that bother me. So, for now, I’m still in.
 

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It’s almost like I no longer have time to tolerate the BS. I’ve learned so much from my prior failed marriages. I see things pretty clearly now and react. Can’t be passive about these things.

My point being it supports your theory when a woman sees that you are attractive to other women. It’s like something goes off in their brain and they go into survival mode to keep what they have.
Look I may alone here, but I do NOT find it attractive if the guy I am with is picking up other women. In front of me. And then claiming it is some type of lesson. And I doubt I'm alone in that court.
 

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Look I may alone here, but I do NOT find it attractive if the guy I am with is picking up other women. In front of me. And then claiming it is some type of lesson. And I doubt I'm alone in that court.
I’m sure. I understand. I had to do it for my own reasons. Not everyone will agree with me, I know. I’m sure you are not alone in your thinking. She was getting too complacent. Boundaries were getting blurred. She needed a wake up call, so that’s what I gave her.
 

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Look I may alone here, but I do NOT find it attractive if the guy I am with is picking up other women. In front of me. And then claiming it is some type of lesson. And I doubt I'm alone in that court.
I agree.

Having said that, she was disrespectful too, so they have a tit for tat going on - which will probably happen again, because apparently they're unable to communicate in an open, honest way.

Just now I realized she's the one who's been texting with someone (a man) and lying about it, right?
 

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I agree.

Having said that, she was disrespectful too, so they have a tit for tat going on - which will probably happen again, because apparently they're unable to communicate in an open, honest way.

Just now I realized she's the one who's been texting with someone (a man) and lying about it, right?
You are correct. That apparently ended last weekend. Message received loud and clear, so she says.
 

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See, I just don't understand this way of thinking.

Why does she offer you respect for your blatantly disrespectful behavior?

It was deliberate on your part to 'teach her a lesson'. You knew you were doing something hurttful to her.

To me, she's dysfunctional and unhealthy for tolerating it.

If she had self-respect, she wouldve instantly walked away, gotten an uber home, and not spoken to you again.
I have to agree with this. What stands out for me is she didn't respect herself enough to end things over it which further speaks to her issues of disrespect toward Rebuilding. No matter what the reasoning behind the stunt was it was all dysfunctional, all of it. Further, if stunts like that seem needed to "show" someone how it feels then that someone is seriously lacking in something vital.
 

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I want to add....to Rebuilding. I get why you did it. I just hope you're not settling because you've got two years in with this woman.
🤷‍♂️
I don’t think I am??? I enjoy the time we spend. We do have a lot in common. She checks the big boxes with no cohabitation and no marriage. She’s a good person at heart.
From what I saw, she was just a sounding board for this guy and his failing second marriage 3000 miles away. It was nothing more then that. I know how to check to the degree that I can.
 

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What’s wrong with being an adult and saying what bugs you rather than hitting on other women? If she’s that awful dump her. Who wants to be feel they are constantly trying to convince someone not to cheat on them?
She’s not “awful”. I don’t hit on other “women”. You don’t know the backstory and I don’t want to explain.
 
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