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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
Would you settle for 2-3 times per week, with the occasional tidbit 1/3 of the month?

After a long walk and pleasant chat along the way this is where we're at. Keep in mind too, we've been together almost 15 years and we have a couple of cute little farts running around.

It'll end up being about 60% quickies and 40% gourmet. But I'm by no means a statistician.

1) Yes
2) No
3) Not sure
4) You're a fool


Cheers!
From a dude working toward getting what we want from marriage
 

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Depends on your age I suppose. Fifteen years together you're probably around 40ish.

You do realise that there are people on this forum who would give their right arm to make love 3 times a week?

As a mid fifties man, yes I would settle for that.

We tend to be about every other day, but typically will do perhaps four days in a row then take two or three days off. It varies I'd hate to have it on some kind of schedule I like it to be spontaneous.
 

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One thing you REALLY need to get through your head is that it dosen't matter what other people want or do or would settle for. With this post, you are playing a game that gets you nowhere.

THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IS WHAT IS OK FOR YOUUUUUUUUUUUU
 

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Frequency, yes but I would say more like 70% gourmet and 30% quickies. (Hubby's 45 and I'm 40).
 

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Discussion Starter #6
THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IS WHAT IS OK FOR YOUUUUUUUUUUUU
I'm not a narcissist, I'm a reasonable man and trying to find my way to what I feel is within reason for the both of us.

Nobody has all the answers...self included. But we always keep learning and keep on bettering ourselves, huh?

Nothing wrong with throwing thoughts out there.
 

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The way I see it the number of times a week doesn't matter. What matters is that both partners needs are being met.

Are you going to "settle" on 2 to 3? "this is where we're at", is that a good place or a bad place?

We've been together 20 years, neither one of us would consider 2-3 (85% gourmet) to be settling. For full discloser, her slow trend to be fine with once a week/10 days is getting alarming.
 

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H is away for work 3 weeks at a time then home for 3; with that it'd be hard to say how many times a week. We take advantage of every opportunity when he's home but more often than not, we're more concerned with QUALITY than quantity. We're both in our mid 40's with children that are grown & gone.
 

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We are about once a week. My drive is a bit low, but no major problems or ED. Some weeks are 2-3 times. Then other times we might go 10-12 days of drought. If I were to create a decimal, I would guess 1.2 to 1.3 times a week.

Quality is very high most of the time.
 

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Considering what we've been through the last couple years, and the fact that my husband is now on meds which have screwed up his drive.... I would be ECSTATIC if we had sex 2-3 times a week! We're at once a week right now. We have been married 12 years, together 13. We have three kids: 11, 6, & 4. Yea, I would LOVE 3 times a week!
 

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I don't "settle".

So for me it's not the quantity it's the QUALITY that matters.

Quickies are for times when there is no time. They have their place but we don't do them as part of our regular intimate times together.
 

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Probably the closest number I could come up with is 1.7 times a month. No children, early 30's. Not sure exactly how others define quickies, but I would say for us 75% quckies.
 

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Your wife is making a good faith effort to prioritize you and please you.

I believe you should let her know that you would also like to get better at pleasing her.
 

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2-3x/week sounds like a lot to me and is wishful thinking. I think 1x is good, although as the other posters said, it's what works for you.
 

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Once a week, occasionally twice. 100% gourmet. Quickie denotes someone hasn’t come full circle. My wife drives the boat in that matter and “If Momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy” and I like it that way.
 
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