As some already know, my fiance and I are going through hard times. She has pulled back with the talk of "I love you but not in love with you right now". Though there are accusations, Her affirmation and me knowing her pretty well firms up that cheating is not in the mix here.
Most of our problems stem from her seeing me as someone that has failed to commit or act that I truly love her. All things I am working on. She has told me point blank that she is on the fence and does NOT know which way it will go.
However, we have talked about my needs and how I am a physical person and kisses and hugs each day are important to me. Though she is having a hard time with emotion, she is still allowing me to touch her, about anywhere, kiss her, and we even had sex for an hour last night. She likes when I am sort of demanding and take charge so I just got behind her before we went to bed, and went after her. After which she guided me through oral on her with my hands that lasted 15min and her moaning in happiness.
She has made it CLEAR that we are having sex, not making love, but I also wonder if this is a sort of door she is purposely leaving open to make sure I walk through? She said that touching is OK but our big, passionate hugs and such are out but sort of leading me, IMO, that I need to keep her on the path right now and keep leading her.
We are starting MC next Monday. After reading some comments here, I feel that our sessions will go MUCH better than a lot of people. No screaming, no unknowns, we know where each other are, just not sure how to navigate them now.
I am really sorry if I sound like a broken record about now. New emotions everyday but I think now that we have broken some walls in the sexual boundaries, it will help because I seriously think it is hard for her to "just have sex" and not have emotions.
I guess I am sort of thinking now that she has thought I did not love her for so long that she just wants to see me WANT her and see that I am going to do things to change before she will turn the faucet back on.
Most of our problems stem from her seeing me as someone that has failed to commit or act that I truly love her. All things I am working on. She has told me point blank that she is on the fence and does NOT know which way it will go.
However, we have talked about my needs and how I am a physical person and kisses and hugs each day are important to me. Though she is having a hard time with emotion, she is still allowing me to touch her, about anywhere, kiss her, and we even had sex for an hour last night. She likes when I am sort of demanding and take charge so I just got behind her before we went to bed, and went after her. After which she guided me through oral on her with my hands that lasted 15min and her moaning in happiness.
She has made it CLEAR that we are having sex, not making love, but I also wonder if this is a sort of door she is purposely leaving open to make sure I walk through? She said that touching is OK but our big, passionate hugs and such are out but sort of leading me, IMO, that I need to keep her on the path right now and keep leading her.
We are starting MC next Monday. After reading some comments here, I feel that our sessions will go MUCH better than a lot of people. No screaming, no unknowns, we know where each other are, just not sure how to navigate them now.
I am really sorry if I sound like a broken record about now. New emotions everyday but I think now that we have broken some walls in the sexual boundaries, it will help because I seriously think it is hard for her to "just have sex" and not have emotions.
I guess I am sort of thinking now that she has thought I did not love her for so long that she just wants to see me WANT her and see that I am going to do things to change before she will turn the faucet back on.